Day 119.
Thatās 17 weeks. If you told me this time last year that Iād be here today, Iād never believe you. Itās kookoo bananas what can change in a year. Itās not like the last 119 days have been a walk in the park, but Iād take 'em over any day with a glass in my handā¦
Change is slow, and definitely not linear, but itās little things - like realizing Iāve forgotten to think about having a drink. Iām not just visiting, Iām putting down roots here on the sober side of the fence. Glad I could join the neighbourhood
Gānight all - letās do another day tomorrow. Big love.
@Clarity you are facing your grief with such courage - so proud of you. @anon27760155 you are facing your life with courage - so proud of you! @Misokatsu no offense taken, at least by me! canāt imagine you being anything but your kind, funny, supportive self. if you had a bad day, donāt be hard on yourself. @Peace yer killinā it! @Tomek seems like youāre showing your parents what it means to love unconditionally. they are lucky to have a son to lead them through this as you are. your courage too is inspiring.
1413 days today. Wasnāt feeling it in todayās IOP therpy group. One woman had to keep giving her $0.02 without anyone asking for it. But what are you gonna doā¦!
Bahahaha too many things could kill you lol ā¦ You know what though, in Australia there have been a lot of shark attacks lately. Heaps more than normalā¦normally the ocean isnāt a concern, we grow up in it here from knee high as kids so nothing scares us here, but lately the sharks have been going crazy attacking surfers.
403 Days. I have a 3 month commitment as the chairperson at my womanās Monday night meeting. I would have never considered doing this a year ago but I think itās time I start giving back. Tonight was special. It was a celebration meeting and I gave a year coin to a very deserving lady. Sheās very quiet and it was nice to hear her speak about the past year. She brought us all to tears. The connections Iāve made here and AA are absolutely priceless. I wish I would have known how great sobriety can be years ago. Love to my awesome TS family.
And Iām going on day number 7 with no vaping or smoking cigarettes. First 2 days were really hard but itās getting easier each day. Good night every one and keep up the good work.
Reminds me of something that happened years agoā¦ I was hanging out with friends when one received a call from his girlfriend. He had set the Darth Vader theme as her ringtone I asked if the girlfriend knew about this and he blushed, looked sheepish and said nothing We almost died laughing
The story has a beautiful ending. They married not long afterwards and are still married with kid #1
Coffee. Bad night. Nervous about the ms teams meeting I have with one of the two therapists that will conduct my upcoming group therapy. I feel as if my life depends on it. Which it doesnāt but still. I waited bloody long for it. Not even sure it will happen as she hasnāt sent me a link for it yet. And not even sure the group will happen as we have a lockdown hanging over our heads.
In other news I got my third negative covid test result yesterday. I almost start wishing itād be positive for a change. But not quite really. And getting my flu shot this morning. Two more late shifts left before my vacay. Yay. Have a good day all. Sober and clean. Love from Amsterdam.
Happy belated birthday Courtney. Congratulations that you were able to celebrate your special day embracing sobriety. A most precious gift. Much love and respect my friend.
Day 3 fasting and day 3 caffeine free, 723 day alcfree I think. Anyway I feel like being 80 or so. I have all supposed fasting symptoms, backpain, migrain-like headache. Iāll got to the gym doing a light course and into sauna.
Sleep remains tricky, tho itās partly due to the small people in the household and long standing issues with insomnia not just the absence of pills. However I do accept that pills were often a good cure for insomnia - tho the price was not being present for the kids, who I love so much and want to be here for.
Without numbing as a response to complicated situations I find I now need strategies and emotional coping mechanisms. I heard someone say yesterday that in sobriety it gets easier then harder then easier. I donāt know if thatās true but I have found that initially it was easier without the guilt or fatigue but now Iām having the adjust to difficult situations where drinking or pilling canāt be a crutch anymore.
Today Iām working on patience - being present in the moment and trying to note cues when Iām losing patience.
@Thirdmonkey hits it on the head ; āSobriety is far more than just ānot drinkingā
Love hearing your getting a sponsor, this is life changing and youāll wonder why you didnāt do it earlierā¦ proud of you and well done on your sober days
Did this last night and will likely do this every day for the next month. Turns out once you start with one resentment they all flood out. Good luck and I pray for you.