Hello, all! Day #60. Yaaay! I just want to shout out to @anon60334405 for this line: If you can control it, can you enjoy it? If you enjoy it, can you control it? That sparked a great conversation with my son - 85 days sober - and me last night. And we reached the same conclusion about the myth of moderation: what’s the point? One drink, two drinks, somewhere the switch is going to be flipped and we’ll think, screw it - let’s get wasted. There’ll always be the next painful morning, the personal berating, the anxiety. There is nothing magical about booze except for the way it messes with our minds and fucks up our lives. Once that’s accepted, a whole other world opens. Thank you, Mike, and all of you for getting us this far.
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Panic mode is setting in now:
My surgery has been brought forward to tomorrow… F@*k.
Im not ready, I really have not thought about it and I really am Crapping myself now, Ive declined pain meds as I feel that would be cheating my sobriety…
Now Im Crapping myself, there is no one who is going to be looking after me and I thought at least I could have tomorrow to get snacks and drinks to keep beside me in my bed and now I’ve gotta run out like blue ass fly to get everything!
And what if I can’t cope with the pain from the surgery, these are the moments I hate being alone!
How on earth am I going to manage.
I am a f**ktard!
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You’ve got this. You’re one tough cookie, and you’ve got all of your friends here to lean on if you’re struggling. Get your supplies and the sooner it’s done the sooner it will be over and you can start the recovery process. Don’t forget to breathe!!!
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@Jenni @Thumper1213 @anon60334405 @Girlinterrupted @Mychelle @Northlander17 @Hailstrom @Charlie_C @marcusmaximus2000 can only do ten so next banging in another great sober day is @Desire2ChangeToday well done 
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We’re here for you, just virtually. It’ll be over before you know it.
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Oh I’m so glad to hear you guys talked it out and he gets it and just slipped up. It DEFINITELY is hard to not try to fix it when people you love are hurting.
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No way! That explains so much!!
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Nothing like a good old bag of something to eat to make you hungry in ten minutes 
I fancied a change the other day and went deluxe which apparently meant pay an extra £2 for a slice of tomato, wtf. Great sober days BTW.
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Right back at you, my friend!
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Day 1.5 Alcohol and Nicotine free. Major head fog and insomnia last night.
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Charlie, what is gonna make it stick? I agree with @Englishd, I thought you had finally turned a corner.
I want to see you succeed!
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Oh s**t. I’d freak out too.
Breathe.
Breathe.
Practicalities usually pan out.
It’s ok to be crapping yourself although no one wants to, obviously.
You don’t need to be ready, only to show up.
You’re enough as you are.
This might test your sobriety but you’ve put so much effort into it and you’re not cocky about it I’m certain you will ace this.
Keep breathing.
Focus on facts and what is necessary.
You can do this.
I’d fly out if I could 
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I’m glad I could help 
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Son of a bitch. 
You’ve been through so much. But more importantly you’ve slayed the Dragon every time it gets in your path. Your going to breathe. A lot. And your going to figure this one out too.
Make sure you got your head phones and your music ready to go. I’d say it’s ok to have some one dole out your pain pills but you don’t have anyone to do that?? You know yourself. If it’s too much temptation then you’re doing the right thing. Can you at least get something over the counter?
We all love you and are praying for ya.
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Lol right?!?! Thank you!!!
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tricky one bc obviously we have a life to live but I’m fresh to all this and have had it drummed into from day one to be of service, our recovery depends on the help we give to others and dig for gold and give it all away. I’m sure after I’ve completed my 12 steps and have a handful of sponsees I might feel a bit more under pressure by others. For now though I would like to congratulate you on doing selfless acts of kindness and doing things you don’t want to do to save the lives of others. Stop caring for 6 months and see how that works out for you 
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Lol, Paul… you’re so friggin funny~! You should be in the advertising business! “Pay extra; for a tomatoooo!” 
We’re all gonna be here praying and holding your virtual hand, sweetie! 
Day 31. Not every day can be an awesome day. I didn’t sleep very well last night, and it’s definitely affecting my mood today.
I’ve been learning to answer the phones at work, and got some feedback that I am trying not to take too hard. My training has been minimal, so it’s a matter of asking the right questions and being patient while I learn new skills. We receive calls from all over the country, so it’s going to take a minute to fully understand what’s happening.
Looking forward to picking up some groceries on my way home, then going for a long walk with Max and getting to bed early tonight.
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I agree about the water… not about to go where i can get eaten by something lol!
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