I don’t think she hates anything but she petty herself all the time. Whatever happens is never her own fault and it’s always someone else who gets the blame. I think she’s gotten away with doing so for a long time because no one have dared to take the conflicts or her anger outburst. I agree that she definitely needs to see that the actions she choose to make will have consequences. I know and I’ve seen that she’s very much capable of planning her next steps manipulating people so she gets her own will almost every single time.
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Nicely done. Felicidades! I haven’t kept up on your personal thread, sorry, but I really appreciate you checking in here. In the past, when I was in my lurking days and then earlier days of sobriety I appreciated seeing your posts here. Happy for you.
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I feel both for you and the tweenie. I’d say there’s a big need for professional help, if you want to persist in helping her I’d say help for you both. You both need safety and stability in your lives. The tweenie needs to learn some people can be trusted. Pretty clear she doesn’t trust anybody right now which seems pretty logical knowing her history a little bit. She made her own rules and follows her own guidelines which are pretty dysfunctional but what do you expect from a 13 year old. It will take a lot of work, and not just yours, and also not just hers, to gain her trust. I can imagine the impact on you and your family is way too big. Know you have my total admiration for giving it your best. I know you do and my heart goes out to you. My heart also goes out to the tweenie. Reminds me of myself at that age, lying and cheating and doing it all my own way because the world and everybody wasn’t to be trusted and I felt I had to do it all alone. She needs some serious re-parenting and you alone are not going to give it to her I think. IMO that’s impossible. Hope some professional help comes through soon. Big hugs and love to you all Sophia. This is hard.
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Thank you 
She had a lot of chances though, but she keeps wrecking them on purpose. But you might be right, it might be a trust issue. And you’re absolutely right in the fact that she’s just a kid. I had some problems in my teens too as you know. But yes, we definitely need professional help that’s why we reached out to the social service. When my now 18 y/o was younger her adhd made it hard, almost impossible for her to express her feelings and put words on them. We got behavior therapy for her from the social service (They’ve got a special unit here called family treatment) for about 6 months and it was like talking to another child. She still uses some of those tricks today and I could hear her saying to her boyfriend a few days ago that she didn’t want a hug because she felt like the gray sad hippo (That’s one of the cards used to put pictures and names on feelings) luckily he had the same issues as a teen (he’s 20 now so a young adult) and could completely understand what she meant.
I’m hoping for something likely for tweenie. She needs to learn that you just can’t set your own rules, not give a darn and blame everyone else. And we need help with how to handle the situation before it ends up worse than it already is. I’m still sober though, but it’s weighing very much on the end.
Thank you so much for your encouragement and support
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Checking in January 8th 2021
I woke up tired and soar from my workout so grateful its from working out and not a hangover
I lost 16 pounds very proud of that !still trucking wich wouldnt have been possible if i did not choose sobriety . At the moment im working for this guy who is very stressful to work for got a company who just hired me for $30 an hour ovetime every week cant wait to leave this gig and move on after being let go from my origional company ! LETS GOOOO !!!
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Day 364!! Tomorrow is the day 
Feeling stable. Trying to feel better but it’s though.
Hope everyone has a good sober friday!
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Great for you trucker that overtime is going to add up quick
210 days clean and sober today which is technically 7 months!!! Congratulations @Piglet my sober twin, what a journey so far!!! I love you all very much and I’m proud of how everyone one is moving through each day with each other, helping each other and supporting each other’s sobriety!!! Thank you everyone for sharing this journey with me, have a FANTASTIC DAY!!! 
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I had the same kind of experience a little while ago. I saw an advertisement for Canadian Club and Dry…I thought how delicious that would be…it was 9am on a Monday morning…Went to work and hadn’t thought about it again till now!!
the things we see out on the road im sitting out here with no fuel on the side of the road and this person slams right into traffic i thank god this person did not slam into my trailer they have medical and police surrounding the scene now 
everyone drive safe.
everyone drive safe.
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Finishing up day 160 AF. Sober today, sober tomorrow. Have just spent some time catching up on this thread. So pleased to be a part of this. Have a happy day/night everyone 
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Yea ambualnce took the driver to the hospital police are on scene now its a crazy way to start a friday 
When you think “you deserve it” after a long effort, it’s an half-truth thought.
You deserve to reward yourself, you deserve to do something to make you feel good, you deserve to cool down and enjoy the accomplishment, you deserve to chill, … it’s just that all the previous “I deserve it” used to be completed with “I deserve a drink”.
Good for you now when you think that, it means you have done something hard and can go have a time for yourself to enjoy life and stop working on school stuff. So the thought that you deserve a drink indicate you need something: you just don’t know what it is yet because alcohol used to be the selected action to every needs you had before.
I say “you” but I mean “I” or “us”, if this description fits you of course. Hope you’d find the reward your looking for elsewhere than in booze!
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I’ve been there a lot. Beautiful area. Located right at the base of the mountains. Small town life, but not far from bigger cities.
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Congrats, man - gotta love those big, round numbers!!!
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That’s crazy so trucker why dont you have fuel? Did you do your DOT inspection?
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Checking in sober and ditching caffeine now too. I thought I had mostly moved past the panic attacks but they reared their ugly head again. It is the worst feeling… 
hopefully more water and less caffeine will help. Here’s to another 24 hrs 
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Day 14. I’m so glad it’s Friday. I can’t wait to get out of work and hit the gym. The whole fam has joined me in my most recent attempt to stay sober. We all have gym memberships now and we’ve all been going more often than not. It has really helped me and I see it helping my kids too. For me, it has helped to have less scattered anxious thought processes and more relaxed focus. It has helped to keep be busy and away from the alcohol. It’s helping me sleep better. For my daughter who’s only ailment is that she’s is very overweight, has been eating better and feeling better about herself since hitting the gym with me, and my son, who has several of the same addictions as me, has been feeding into his addictions less now that he’s been busy at the gym and is also feeling better with the way he looks and feels and sleeps. This was likely the best Christmas present I could have given to my kids. Mom being sober, and gym memberships for everyone. And while paying for three memberships every month is sort of expensive, it is still costs less than booze for a month.
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