My heart goes out to you Rob, at loss of what to say. Will be praying for you my sober friend.
Blessings and sobriety!
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Awwā¦ Thank you Paul. Youāre also amazing and youāre doing amazing stuff my sober pal. Keep on trucking ODAAT!
Blessings and sobriety!
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Day 250.
I woke up, made a list, planned to set the world on fire today. Got about as far as finding a match and then took a nap. 
Last week mustāve taken it outta me. Today was naps and walks in the beautiful above freezing temps. A beauty slow day. A slow sober day beats a slow hungover day - any day.
Will save the fires for tomorrow! When we do another day. I know we can.
Gānight, dear sober pals. 
@SoberWalker I like what I see too! Woo hoo on 900!
@MrsOdh oh so good to see you here and get some pink back in my world! Glad to hear you are doing well.
@Misokatsu I love how you put that - very regular, but very precious day.
@Peace 6 weeks Jen! Way to go!
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Big hug, Rob. Too, too much right now. Sending you love.
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Oh For fucks sake Rob. This is just awful. I wish I had some words for ya. But I donāt blame you for being mad as hell. And Iād be angry as hell at God and anyone or thing else in my path. You can be. Any of us would be. They can fix it. Hopefully they can re-inflate it to maintain your breathing. And probably spend a few days in the hospital. A similar thing happened to my daughter. It was horrible but it got repaired. And it really sucked. And it happened when she was getting some kind of other procedure done.
It sure doesnāt sound like God is answering any of our prayers for you but Iām going to continue to pray. For you. Iām so sorry your suffering like this Rob. Hang in there. This is more than anyone should have to deal with.
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Great share John. All really good stuff.
Fuck that poison. Good for you man.
Congratulations on 105 days and feeling good.
On day at a time.
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Great post. I identify with a lot of it and feel exactly the same.
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Checking in on day 854.
Have a good Sunday all 
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@Rockstar24777 omg, that is just terrible. Please keep us updated how things are going. U must be so angry and worried, stay strong.
@JoMarch I know what u mean. Why canāt I just have regular thought patterns, not ones that seek out negatives and obsession? I donāt know. But we have to work with the cards we are dealt. And with the right tools we can make a decent hand.
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Thanks Eric I appreciate it a lot. Iām sorry about your daughter, itās the worst pain ever for real. Yeah Iām hoping that once I get my year sober things may take a turn for the good. Most challenging first year sober Iāve ever experiencedā¦ thanks again bro have a great night 
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Day 208
Another average day. Really not much to tell, folks. Some irritating things are irritating, some sucky things suck, but there is no black cloud of guilt over things I did (or didnāt do), no fear of what I canāt remember. I have to actually make the effort to remember those times now, which is both good and bad, I guess.
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I am sorry for you that you have to get through this shit. W/o having control over it. That is awful. Despite that you gave me a smile into my face for venting correctly. I hope your are getting well soon
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Thank you so much @anon74766472 I appreciate that. Have a great night Iām checked into another hospital and they are so very kind. It will be ok
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That sounds good. Nice and comprehensive people is soo good to heal and come to rest.
No night here on the other side of the ocean. 
I am having āfunā with my tax declaration. 
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- Coffee. Sunday. Working in a couple of hours, the best paid day of the week yay! And tomorrow itās my weekend yay again!. Feeling good this morning. Spending some time with Luna and with all of you, my brave sober and clean warriors. ODAAT forever. Have as good a Sunday as you all can friends. Clean and sober. Love from Luna and me.
@Rockstar24777 Iām happy youāre in a good hospital now Rob. Thinking of you.
@Tommo Glad to see you back Tom. Big congrats on 6 months.
@cwak Iāve been looking for an article I once read on my old quit smoking forum about the void that shows itself once we quit our DOC. I canāt find it now so shortly my own ideas about it: IMO thereās two sides to it. Filling the void is one of the main reasons we addicts all use. Thereās something missing in our lives and we try to fill that by using. In the end that method doesnāt work. In fact by using we make the void inside us ever bigger because there is no substance to (ab)using (pun intended). So once we become clean and sober we are confronted with a huge void inside of us that we are desperate to fill.
We have to go looking for ways to fill that void. Thatās different for all of us. You have to look into yourself to what that could be. Just an example: what did you really like as a kid that got lost in adulthood? Maybe you can find something there. Lots of other opportunities too, go and examine yourself and the world and find new things to do. Challenging but very fulfilling.
On the other hand, and maybe even more importantly I think, we have to learn to accept and appreciate that actually the void exists inside of us, that there is part of us that is nothing, needs nothing, that just is. We actually need a void as part of us, not an overwhelming huge part but an essential part nonetheless. We need to experience life and existence just as it is. This is where spirituality and meditation comes into play. Iām a very down to earth guy and I shiver by the idea of God and HPās and all that. I do believe strongly though that we are all connected, that the universe is one and that we have to feel (more than think) we are part of it. Together. We all share the space and we all share the void. When we were using we did the opposite, we isolated ourselves. Sorry if this all too vague but for me it works. Success friend Iām sure youāll find your way.
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Some really great thoughts for me to sit and ponder. This seems like another level of intellect that I havenāt unlocked yet
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So itās said that God never gives us more than we can carry and he must know the strength in you bc your still standing and your still sober and talking about the year with no alcohol involved. I canāt help you with your life problems but I can tell you I see an amazing person going through an experience that would stop most people in their tracks. While you are learning your lesson we are all learning from you, well I know I am anyway. Iāve recently learnt myself that God is a bit fucking sick sometimes but ultimately if we remain sober through our troubles we realize heās not the one causing them heās the one carrying us through them.
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One of my therapist said once. Great feeling empty. Thereās place to fill in with new stuff. Thinking about void. The feeling of emptiness,lonely, not being enough comes up. Find joy in doing things alone. Being more mindful. It seems for me that there are so many approaches, ways to start with. This is so relieving and confusing in the same time. Is a new hobby only a replacement for the void? To keep myself occupied, busy. Thanks for your input and happy that we are all here, together, learning.
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Youāve helped me more then once
You ARE a Rockstar
Like @Dolse71 said
Your doing things that some couldnāt
Iāll be thinking of you
Iām sorry you have to go through this whole thingā¦
Your very strong
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