- I haven’t posted in a couple days but I’ve been around. I’m fighting a flare-up and I can be miserable at times. Tomorrow is my sweet Reona’s Day. I say it that way because I had her for 47 minutes and it was both her first day and last day with me. My parents are having a dinner for her. Me and the kids will spend the evening with them.
Congrats on all the glorious milestones. You all are amazing me and I’m proud of everyone fighting this fight to stay sober. Have a happy hump day TS fam
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There is power in prayer, there is no denying that. You’re welcome!
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Day 405~ Checking in. There’s so much going on inside my head it’s hard to get out what I want to say. I’m sober and I know that’s the most important. I’m trying so hard to live by it’s God’s Will not mine but it’s so difficult to completely let go and allow life to just play out the way its supposed to. Being in control makes me feel like I’m in control. In reality it’s just another flaw I need to work on. I cannot control anything but myself. I know this. I tell myself this daily. Maybe I’m just in a funk or maybe and most likely this is another lesson I’m learning along this sober journey. I’m just going to stick to the basics and take it one day at a time. That’s all I can do. Life is always going to be challenging and there are things that people will do that I’ll never understand but I need to keep moving forward and bettering myself and not allow others actions to take control of me and hold my feelings hostage.
Life’s super busy right now. The shop is booming. Business is great. I have my health and my family does too. I have many blessings. I’m lucky to have what I have and be able to give what I can give. There are waves of uncertainty but never enough to derail the work I have put in. I will keep fighting and praying because that’s what I do. Much love TS friends. Never give up no matter how badly sometimes you may want to. Always keep the faith. Sober life is the best life.
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Day 9, alcohol free. Thanks to everyone who gave sleep advice yesterday! I tried some things and slept a little bit better last night. As several mentioned to me, I’m mostly trying to be patient and set solid bed times/wake times and create a night routine. Now that I’m sober, I’m just so anxious to start fixing the things that I’ve put off for the last 8 years because of constantly being drunk - namely my weight and my overall health. Trying to give myself time and take it slow is tough. But I know I’ll get there.
Still pretty tired, but not as bad as yesterday. Today’s looking good.
Hope everyone has a productive, sober day!
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I’m right there with you, @Dragonflygirl82. I ask out loud every night, help me to do thy will not mine. Letting go of control is so hard. Thanks so much for posting this.
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I resonate with this so much. I’ve let so many things go living in a drunken fog for several years that I’m in some sort of relay race with my self to knock out and reverse all of the damage done over the past few years. All I can tell you is that it takes small consistent actions over time and patience. A year from now you will feel a bit better and notice the progress, it just becomes more noticeable over time. All you can do is do the right the right thing today and the interest will compound eventually as long as you stay on track.
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Checking in at the end of day 80.
Not a lot to report.
I have one eye on Friday when I start a two week holiday from work. That was always the start of 14 days of oblivion. Could be a trigger. Watch this space.
Have a great sober day, wherever you are.
Goodnight. 
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This was really encouraging to me last night. You’re totally right and maybe I just need to be centered on the fact right now that being tired is still infinitely better than waking up hungover. While it’s been hard and I’m tired, I am enjoying my days more than I have in almost a decade and maybe I just need to be happy with that for now. Thank you!!
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Day 286 clean and sober today. One minute at a time sometimes but I’m doing it. I’m having a hard time passing the state test for entry level certification that is needed to start in the field of counseling here in California I think because I have so much going on in my brain I can’t concentrate like I would be able to normally so one of the counselors next door will be coming by today to help me pass my exam. Very grateful for that. I’m all over the board and everything is so up and down throughout my days it’s very exhausting. I hope everyone has a great day today, love you guys 
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I can totally relate to the levels of loneliness Sarah. It’s one of the tougher emotions to have to walk through in my opinion. I too wish I had someone that would walk through this life with me, especially now. I’m proud of you for staying sober you’re AMAZING!
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I do the exact same thing when I get intense cravings @Jennajen, I just go to bed and know things will be different in the morning. My old sponsor said that if the best we can do is just go to bed, that’s still another day sober won. Proud of you always, have an awesome day
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Thanks. Really glad I have this place to come to. I can’t imagine where I would be without everyone here. Reading everyone’s stories and trials and tribulations helps a lot.
Im super excited for you becoming a counselor, you are gonna be great! The fact that you are even up to taking the test right now shows your strength and your desire to help people. You are a truly incredible person.
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Awwww thanks Sarah that means a lot
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281 days. Although I’m feeling better, I need to keep my bitchiness in check. I have gone from not saying anything about or to the one roommate and am now bluntly speaking my mind. I know this isn’t healthy and pray for the ability to have no desire to react to his stupidity. We have “got into it” a couple times over the past few days and his immaturity gets to me. Thankfully my man has been doing a lil venting about him as well. The fact of the matter is that he won’t be moving out anytime soon so I need to somehow accept his presence without totally ignoring it. Reached out to an old friend and went for a visit on the weekend. It did me good to hear her say that nobody could be going through my current situation and not feel the stress. There are days that I feel like I’m going insane but hitting my pillow sober is a great victory. Today is a new day and I plan to stay in my own lil world focussing on diffusing the bomb within.
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Feeling you, feeling you hard. We can be our own worst downer. Maybe an audiobook of self worth and self kindness. As sometimes we just need someone to remind us that we are worth it and we are amazing…BTW… you are amazing and you are so worth it🤩
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Aww thanks! I just downloaded a podcast by Brene Brown about loneliness and connection! LOL… Going to listen to it on my way home. I am going to find some more uplifting ones too. Thank you @MagicMama you really are magic!! Hope you have a good one today in your beautiful garden. 
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I love her podcast she’s amazing keep up the good work!!
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Thank you
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Thank you, Shay. I’m so glad I came back to this community. You guys are so encouraging it’s ridiculous lol.
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@Tommo congrats on 200 days 
@TSan thank you so much 
@CapriciousCapricorn congrats on 450 days
@Girlinterrupted congrats on 300 days
@Complicatedmama sending strength for tomorrow 
@Singtone congrats on 80 days
226 days no alcohol.
194 days no cocaine.
0 days for binge-eating.
I was really proud thinking I’d be coming here to type a little something about 3 weeks with no binge-eating but I decided to ‘treat’ myself to 3 large bags of crisps (chips to some) whilst watching the final on The Voice UK. It’s done now though and I’m confident I can start again now and go much further, progress still.
The relapse feelings have thankfully passed. I’ve enjoyed watching the episodes on The Voice UK that I’d missed. I was pleased with who won too so that’s a bonus.
Going to carry on with some decluttering tomorrow morning and take the stuff that’s gathered in my hallway to the recycling centre. Then it’s zoom support group in the afternoon.
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