Day 215: Feeling a lot more peaceful than I did most of last week. There really feels like there’s some stress energy in my different worlds and man, do I feel it in my core. I declare today is take-a-damn-breath day! And take a break from my phone and internet, too. Wish me luck with that! 
Gonna spend some time in the kitchen, hopefully tidy my zen den (it’s not very zen at the moment), and call my mom. Hope you all have a successful sober Saturday. Much love 
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@Piglet congrats on 300 days 
@Complicatedmama sending prayers for your health 
@Harold congrats on your soberversary 
@Nordique congrats on 300 days
@icebear & @Misokatsu congrats on 8 months
@Rockstar24777 congrats and I think you’ll be really great in this role 
@RosaCanDo good luck with the technology downtime 
243 days / 8 months no alcohol.
211 days no cocaine.
Feeling really peaceful in this moment. Had a very productive day before doing my meditations then coming here. Packed 9 boxes of stuff from my kitchen! Still another 2 cupboards to go but most of that is items that are in their own boxes already so I’ll finish that off tomorrow with any other random bits I’ve missed along the way. It feels good to be nearing the end of this side of the moving mission.
One week today it will be 25 years since my mum passed away. I am trying to pay close attention to how I’m feeling and what I’m thinking because in a few days time it will be the anniversary of my relapse. I don’t feel at risk of repeating the same mistake but I’m being cautious because I know how deceiving it can be and how impulsive I can be.
It’s so nice when it’s the weekend and I haven’t got the anxiety of waiting for an email to come through saying we’ve exchanged, as much as it can’t come soon enough, the anxiety during weekdays is very suffocating at times. It’s a relief to feel some calm.
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Thank you @CATMANCAM I appreciate that and I will be keeping you in my prayers this week. Have an awesome weekend! 
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Yay… Congrats on a year sober, keep on trucking ODAAT! 
Blessings and sobriety!
Bravo on 300 days and thank you for letting us share in your recovery journey. Keep on keeping on ODAAT.
Blessings and sobriety!
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Thanks again to everyone for all the congrats and support! Too many people to count at this point but I appreciate each and every one of you guys 
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Here’s to 8 months alcohol free, keep on sobering!
Blessings and sobriety!
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I’m here I’m, I’m alive and I’m sober.
Day 223
. Today we’ve been away helping an old lady (a friend to the family, her husband passed away from Covid-19 in December)
She’s moving out if her house. It’s supposed to be empty at May 1st. The problem is that’s it’s a house with two floors ans it’s like an extended version of extreme hoarders.
My husband has been there for weeks trying to fix the garden up, and the storage units there.
Today I cleared the dining room except for one bookshelf with vases. She’s got a company coming to pick up the big and heavy stuff, and things that’s going out on auction next week.
After that I decided to clean the bathroom to make it at least decent. It took me three hours. And I still had one cabinet left to clean when I was done. But it feels good to have given her a nice and clean bathroom at least. No one should have to live like that.
I told her I’m going to clean and clear the kitchen next week. She didn’t really agreed. She wants to save everything and sell the rest. We neither have time for that and most of it isn’t in usable condition anyway.
I don’t know how I’m going to make her realize that. My husband got a container to her property two weeks ago, but she doesn’t want to throw anything so it isn’t even half full.
I couldn’t stand the thought of cooking in that kitchen and definitely not eating in there so I invited her for dinner in our house instead. Saying that I didn’t want her to be left with the dishes from all of us. She happily accepted, and when she walked into the bathroom after I cleared and cleaned it she almost cried because it was so tidy and clean and smelled so good.
When she moves (she’s moving like a 2 hours one way ride from here) I’m going to make sure that she has a cleaning lady coming 2 times a week, even if I personally have to ride my bike there to clean it.
Besides that tweeniea mother have started to harass and threat us. We’re bad parents, we don’t care for tweenie, we’re going to make her want to take her life, we hates here, we psych her out and so on. With every accusation she can come up with. And according to her, most if it is definitely my fault. For making my husband hate his own kid, and her mother (Tough shit finding someone you can’t manipulate because she sees right trough you and always has I guess)
It’s got to that point that the social service have forbidden her to take contact with any of us. She’s only allowed to talk to tweenie.
The mother have said to us multiple times the past few weeks that she’s coming to get tweenie out of here. Social services said to us, and the mother ans tweenie that if she does they are going to use a special law called LVU in Swedish (That easily explained means tgat the if your young and in some kind of danger due to parents abusing you, or due ti your own behavior, you or your parents doesn’t have to agree, the authorities will come by police and take you somewhere else, either to another family or a youth facility home, and you as a parent will need to go to court to change that)
Because it’s best for her to stay here until summer holiday, so she’ll have a chance to Finnish the school year and say goodbye to her friends.
The social service also said to the mother, to us and to tweenie that the reason for her moving to a foster care home has nothing to do with us being bad parents, we’ve done everything we can to protect her from self harm (she isn’t allowed to use her phone or computer as you guys know, and her Ma is raging against us because of that to) we’ve been taking her to her psychiatrist and done more than parents usually do, and still it doesn’t work. Because we’re “just” that, normal parents with normal jobs and no special education handling tweenies kind of problems. The home that they are hoping to find for her, will have that special education ans constant acess to more help via the social service. Because that’s their job (The foster family home’s job)
I can’t even try to explain how it lightened my heart to get that kind of credit from them. For the first time ever it actually feels like they are on our side. And the mean Social service lady even said she was sorry for being blunt.
If the mother keeps harassing us they are going to move tweenie immediately anyway, and forbid the mother to have any kind of contact with her. But I know a lot of the things the mother is raging about comes from tweenie. Every day in school she’s been using the school computer writing messages to her Ma, with lies about us.
However the mother actually tried to be nice to us today via text messages. I’m not buying it, so I’m just waiting to see what she’s up to now.
Sorry for another really long post. I can’t really help myself.
I hope y’all are having an amazing weekend
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@CATMANCAM @icebear
Yes, 8 months, we made it.
Today we are driving to a nearby castle, and then going to watch my husband’s friend’s band. Maybe two years ago I had to be physically carried out of this friend’s Christmas party because I was too drunk. For your imagination, I am a fairly tall and clearly not missing any meals Western lady, and it was my skinny Japanese husband and two of his friends who carried me out. I don’t know if I have briefly seen this friend since or if today will be first time. Feeling a bit awkward.
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Checking in, it’s been a while, far too long infact.
Day 1010. Life is very good 
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Call me OCD but can you edit your post and put the word, Alive, at the beginning. it just doesn’t feel like you without it 
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Love the new couch 
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Way to go Harold!!
So happy for ya 
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Please join us all again my good man…
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Want check see how every one is doing
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Kudos to you for 8 months sober, you’ve got this!
That has me smiling silly. That is the past Fleur, we’ve all done that and more, recovery is about moving forward. I hope you enjoy the band.
Keep on trucking ODAAT!
Blessings and sobriety!
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Walk tall and feel proud, lady! 
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