Makes my heart feel good reading this. It seems a little weird to say “happy for you” but I am soooooo happy for you that you have this support. Yay for the internet and support groups in person and online! You are not alone. Take care.
Love it! I agree with everything you said. It’s crazy what our addict minds will make us believe! I spent half my life thinking sober people were boring… thats the farthest thing from the truth!! It’s actually the other way around. There is nothing more boring and lame than destroying our mind, body, and spirits with drugs and alcohol!! Great job on your break through.
Thanks @JuliaLuna
You are right. I need to be more open with my feelings. I’ve always suppessed my feelings, been too eager to please and have been passive aggressive. This is unhealthy and has led to disproportionate outbursts at inappropriate moments. I realise that now, after being sober for a while. I need to learn how to accept myself. Too much social conditioning of the wrong kind
I am trying. Baby steps. Fingers crossed. This forum has been a big help.
thanks so much @Clarity!!
@manishc your level of self awareness is incredible, and so useful for figuring out what works for us when it comes to improving all the aspects of our heath. i’m so happy you’re finding that by utilizing your methods of release, rather than suppressing your feelings, you feel more stable and less alone — i say that because being “eager to please” is something i too have struggled with and it seemed to only lead to further isolation. yes not only accept yourself but celebrate and honor yourself for the unique and magical individual you are. there’s always work to be done, yes, but that’s all of us! and we are all still worthy, no matter where we are in our journey, of self-appreciation. you’re doing great, keep going
I know I sound like a broken record, but your check ins just make my day. Every single day. @DLS too. We all struggled together, and now we are sober together. It’s really just so amazing
I’m literally in tears and I’m so incredibly grateful that it’s been helpful already. We can all sit here and love you and empathize, but you need to be surrounded by those who have been through it and truly understand the heart wrenching grief you’re enduring. The thought alone is overwhelming. I don’t even know what to say, just know you’re in my heart
Thank you @JuliaLuna
lozenges helped me quit, just leave it in the side of your mouth and away you go. OK on day 3 I still wanted to kill someone, cry and was having a stroke or heart attack but it does pass.
Makes one hell of a difference when we do the things we never thought we needed. Great to see this and well done, it works if you work it
I wonder what happened to all those plans I made 2 minutes before the first smoke of the day
Thanks Paul I guess it’s just a matter of being really committed and riding through the emotions. I have to admit, the lozenges do help me the most but I can’t expect them to do all the hard work for me lol. Just like quitting drinking, we have to dig deep and go through the sweat and tears to really appreciate coming through the other side.
735 days with no alcohol, yes I believe you know the basics
“Russian roulette mummy” how true is that! It really is a great feeling knowing we can be there for our kids. I’m the same when my eldest 2 need to be picked up at night. No more giving them money for an uber or telling them I can’t drive to get them, I always felt so guilty and it would stress me if they were going out because I would feel pressure to behave and control myself that night
Hope your daughter isn’t feeling too sore today
A lot of great insight here and some real thoughts of what it feels like to be enslaved to the System as an addict. It still ends up being our own choice to pickup, but as you alluded to, our society, environment and culture promote and glorify alcohol…without showing the ugly side. The influence, pressure and the social acceptance is non-stop and always in your face. But we are better than this. We just have to work a little harder…love ourselves a little more…look ahead and not back…
For so many years I held myself from the gifts and talents that I was born to use. For so many years I felt useless in this world…what was I contributing to this life…to humanity to make the world a better place? I was to busy selfishly destroying my potential, my worth and my life for the last 30 years…
Sobriety really is a beautiful gift. And I long to see how each and every day builds upon each other…restoring me to the beautiful person I know deep down I am.
Great read and congrats on Day 3!!!
Giving lifts to my kids has become my favourite thing to do. No idea where that came from. I hate driving.
Maybe it’s just because I can. Maybe it makes me feel like a grown up. Maybe it reminds me of the thousands of lifts that my dad gave to me as a youngster. Not sure what it is, but it has become one of those simple things about sobriety that I absolutely love.
Feeling a bit sheepish today, having received a few messages from a few people that I really admire and look up to in the last 24 hours.
My residual self-loathing (it’s a lot better, but it hasn’t disappeared completely) means that I feel bit uncomfortable with the light shining on me - but I must confess that I am really happy with, and proud of, my 5 little months.
I won’t mention people by name, but I think/hope you know who you are.
I cannot believe what a difference this forum has made to my sobriety. I can say with absolute certainty that I would have blown it by now without you excellent people. Thank you.
And I find that as kids get older they talk more when in the car with you. At home its grunts and shrugs lol but for some reason they start to chat and open up more when in the car, it’s a time I can reconnect with them…
Celebrate and be proud!
You’ve worked on you x