10 days down. Went to aa meeting again tonight. Ive been in and out of aa many times over the years. I always try to share something but every time I would clam up, forget that thing I wanted to say and self consciously blab some semi coherent half story. By the end I’d be blushing and sweating even though I’m not afraid to share.
Tonight was my first time to really speak from my heart about my own miserable experience of multiple failed attempts at sobriety. How it affects me and those close to me. I spoke about stuff that I’m deeply embarrassed and ashamed of… and it was the first time I felt completely calm and composed not sweating or self conscious. What I said made sense and could be heard clearly by the room.
I hope it becomes the norm because it’s really frustrating when I clam up and my mind goes blank when it’s my turn to share.
Stay safe everyone.
keep it up!!
@Bomdhil Congratulations!
@anon11129033 Happy birthday!
@anon86726034 Keep trying, that voice is sneaky, but u know better now.
Practicing my numbers game for Saturday. 
Back hurts.
Not laid up in bed though.
Nice lunch.
Little depressed.
Still sober.
I’ll call it a good day.
Fuck. Let’s call it a great day.
Checking in on day 27. One great thing coming out of my sober 4th of July weekend is that I discovered Limoncello Lacroix and I love it. We bought a case on Monday and there’s only one can left after the one I’m drinking right now 
My 5 year old is outside playing with the tee ball stuff so I am going to go do some Dad Stuff.
BTW, I am really proud of you @Penguin for opening up to your friend and sharing your story with us. What a beautiful friendship you must have! It’s great to have that kind of support.
Hope everyone is having/had a lovely Thursday (or Friday for my antipodal buddies).
The pressure is on for both of us Saturday. 
Thanks. Hope so. You’re a star. Appreciate your positive vibes. Have a good one.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience with this. This was very helpful to read. I really appreciate it.
I skipped out on veterinary school. 
but that doesn’t sound too bad. Speedy recovery Luna 
I’m glad you got her in today. And least you don’t have to guess or worry about what to do for her.
I hope she eats the new food.
Thank you Stella
Wooooohooooo Tyler
Congrats on 300 days cocaine free!!!
Wow…
That’s hot.
Beautiful!
Proud of you.
I remember telling my mom last year that I was an alcoholic and just being so scared and feeling very vulnerable. Her reaction was exactly the same as your friend’s. She said “I know, we’ve all known” … it felt like I was the last to know. It was such a relief! And since then I haven’t drank. Sometimes we need that support more than we know.
Checking in.
Life is good.
I am getting myself out there, allowing people to see me as I am. It doesn’t feel bad, nor as uncomfortable as I thought it would. I feel like relationships with members from the area I was attending meetings at the begining of my recovery were not happening naturally. I don’t feel that way now…maybe I have found my home.
So there you have it folks…
That took me 18 months of meetings and homegroups and hosting Zoom meetings and 2 sponsors and three fellowships in 2 different areas. 18 months of trying on a bunch of different shirts to see which one felt best and I wouldn’t have given up until I found one.
We can not do this alone and I am not saying that 12 step fellowships are for everyone. But we definitely need like minded people in our lives and hopefully more than 3/4 of them have healthy recovery under their belts.
Keep putting yourselves out there.
Congrats on your recovery.
This is amazing!! 
Gah, I love this post! I so so happy for you and you give me hope.
Congratulations on that 300 Tyler. Great job.
I’m so thankful and feeling blessed. Today is my two week mark. It’s amazing to look back 15 days at how miserable I truly was and the changes I’ve already put in place for myself and do daily with help from this amazing community of extraordinary . Thank you all for all the shared wisdom. It keeps me sober daily
Checking in tonight. Struggling a little but off to bed sober.