Checking on a sober Monday night. Spent the weekend away from being social. Just got with my brother on Friday, he nearly died from COVID last month, was on a vent for 2 weeks and he’s finally out and recovering well. Then took a long hike with my sister Saturday morning. It felt good to be near family and shoot the shit. Tonight my almost 6 yo made us sprinkle chocolate chip cookies! She’s growing up way too fast.
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From what I’ve read and experienced that is totally normal. There’s a ton of sugar in alcoholic drinks so cutting that out will make your body crave it from other sources. I think there’s a decent amount of info around TS on the subject. I agree, it sucks lol
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Day 21! It’s been real rough. I feel much more in tune with my emotions in the sense that I am very sensitive. I was usually too drunk to care. But I know it’s a good thing. 
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Day 57 Alcohol Free
Tonight I had another big event (virtual). Have a presentation and led a discussion on one of my all time favorite topics. It was well received and I felt super happy. And then when it’s over, I’m alone because it’s a virtual event and there’s no mingling on the way out as you might have in person. It’s just me packing up my equipment and driving home. There is that post-performance drop that happens (musicians, theater people, etc. can probably relate). I felt the sinking feeling even as I still felt satisfied about the event. And I remembered that when I would do these events as a drinker, I would typically get really wasted afterward. I didn’t really drink during it because i had to be “on”…but afterwards? I’d go home and get drunk, often by myself because it would already be late. Then stay up later than I needed to and be hungover the next day. I realize now that I was trying to fill that empty feeling that can come at the end. But it’s impossible to fill, and alcohol will definitely never do the job. I just have to feel it and accept it and know it will pass. Tonight it didn’t last for very long. If I was still in my old habits, I’d be drinking and trying to suppress the feeling when I’m reality I’d only be letting it grow. And the next morning it would still be there. I’m SO glad to have broken that cycle. What a relief…
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Are these doctor prescribe? Does someone else have control of these? If not I think you could be on a slippery slop. Be careful.
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Day 1105 
Early out of bed because I wanna walk before work. Have to work a lot this week because we’re too short in coworkers. We hired a new one but she decided one day before she started she won’t come 
It’s hard to find a new one.
Loads of people who want to work but not with this salary and not with the amount of training they have to do in their free time.
Picture of my walk yesterday, I like the lines in this photo.
I wish you a good day!
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@siand ah yes, acceptance, something for me to think about in today’s meditations Good luck with your sale and starting work again. 
@Mno congratulations on 6 years 
I’ve quit a few times over the years but since I’ve quit everything else I’m seriously struggling to stop this last addiction, it really is as you describe it, relentless.
@Misokatsu you are right, it’s just so disappointing and frustrating, and with my friends and family constantly digging at me saying all my problems are because of my weight and if I lost it they would go away 
@Rockstar24777 thank you 
love you too man. I hope the interview went well
@Amawat88 congrats on your week
@Hotic congrats on 1000 days 
@KevinesKay congrats on 3 weeks
@al2017 I so glad you’re brother is recovering 
@aemb congrats on 3 weeks and feeling your feelings
@MagicILY congrats on recognising your progress
413 days no alcohol.
381 days no cocaine.
19 days no disordered eating.
Checking in for yesterday.
In the morning I had the dentist, I had to have a filling without any anaesthetic 
it hurt like hell and still does, I can’t eat on that side without extreme pain, she did say it will probably be sensitive for a few days so I’m just really hoping it settles down!
In the afternoon I had my private consultation for my feet. He said that PF does usually settle down on its own, but can take up to two years, no one has ever told me that before. He said there have only been 1 or 2 patients for whom the shockwave treatment hasn’t worked. He also said he could do the treatment but that his fees are double what the fees are for his physio department, and they use exactly the same machine, so he’s referred me to them for it, and I should hear in a few days. Hopeful
Because of these appointments I also brushed my teeth and showered today. Depression/suspected ADHD makes it so hard to do these things unless I have a ‘dealine’ like an appointment or social occasion, I hate it because I used to be so on it with my hygeine and housework before mental illness got in the way circa 2013, and it’s just been progressively worse regarding things like this ever since, I’m due to speak with my doctor, so I think my job for today is making that call to book an appointment.
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Thanks. This strength is available over the counter so they are not prescribed, but you are right. No one else has control over these. Pain is a funny thing and can sometime be subconsciously turned up or down depending on what other gain comes with it. I’ll stick with paracetamol, a hot bath and some yoga stretches tonight
Thanks
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Hope you hung on ok and are feeling better. When I have urges to SH overloading my senses in other ways seems to help.
Sending love and light.
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I do a lot of ice for my back pain. I invested in some good refreezeable ice packs. Not the cheap drug store brand. Sometimes I alternate heat and cold.
The pain going down the leg is not good. Sorry you got that going on. I’ve been fortunate to just have it central lower back. No leg pain. Back pain sucks
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9 months today
@RetainKingII good to read you worked through it, using your learnings
@anon27760155 hi Danni life is good and I am happy you living it, always helps when we busy for sure
@icebear amazing 
photos
@LeeHawk congrats on 200 days
@Lisa07 what an amazing age and certainly a good reason to celebrate
@HoofHearted I loved every word in your song so much said in every verse
@M-be-free49 loved the chain anology
@CATMANCAM thank you, good luck with Dentist and best wishes you feel better soon as you deserve 
@Mno 6 years, you really do inspire me, I find Smoking hard, I am not smoking weed or tobacco gave that up 9 months ago, but rely heavily on vape, that’s my next hurdle but got to get in right head space, your post has made me revisit the issue
did not hit send yesterday morning to my check in, so sent today
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Comeback…
Good morning.
Checking in alcohol free day 2.
I will not drink with you today. Instead of this, I will go for an easy 4 km jog. Still recovering after removing cataracta in my right eye almost 3 weeks ago. But thats ok…life is good.
Have a nice day beautiful people.
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36 days and I feel great! I’m so excited for the Holidays. My youngest daughter and I are decorating the house together this year. It’s been a good improvement for me. I’m so excited.
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Day 7 today another meeting tonight got to keep on pushing have a good day
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Day 413
Staying on top of data entry, a troublesome part of teaching, and motivated with Japanese study. Noisy (the cat) still has fleas, a bath, drops and flea combing have not worked completely.
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- Coffee. Last day of my work marathon coming up. 5 Days off after that. All of which will be sober and clean because no substance will make my life better. Never again. Well except some painkilling stuff for my shoulder. Naproxen seems to be working OK. Getting a bit better but not over it. Bad for exercising but it is what it is. Have a good day all, or as good as you can all make it. Clean and sober. Love from Luna and me.
Some great stuff shared here! Makes me glad.
@Hopeful777 Congrats on 9 months + 1 day Marie! Yay!
@LeeHawk 200 days! Yay you! Congrats!
@Hotic 1000! Quadruple digits! Huge! Awesome! Thanks for sharing! Congrats!
@Twowaymirror & @ChicagoT Great to see you guys!
@Classix Good to see you friend. Better to see you sober. One day at a time like it is for all of us.
@MagicILY Congrats on 57 and yes on the insight.
@Dolse71 Exactly that Paul. We’re not alone. Thanks.
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Day 10. Grateful for this double digits. Despite all my failures I still have hope
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Thanks I’m just very stressed out and anxiety it really gets to you I’m clean and hope it stays like that
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Welcome back.
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