Checking in, at 40 days in some hours. A few more days now and it will be the longest stretch I had in years. Last year I made it to 41 or 42 days, and wanted to enjoy some wine, because I did so good and it would not be a problem to drink like a “normal” person now.
Yesterday I talked about preparing for my birthday and to stay sober. The first one in years. I never have a great day on my birthday, and thats also why I drink at it, so I can wander off in my mind.
I will make this day a sober day, and even if I dont feel others making it a good one, I will try to do it my self. Make dinner I want and like, make a dessert. And insted of thinking its a shitty day and wish for it to be all about me and everyone doing it Great for me, I will be sober and proud, and that will be more than Great
Day 1092
Doing good these days. Feeling more confidient then usual about myself. I’m very good in hiding my incesure, always have been.
I used alcohol to help me with that in my old life.
What helps me now?
Podcasts about dealing with negative feelings, reading selfcare books. And telling myself I’m good enough!
I’m reading this book right now, do you know it? It’s called “Think like a monk”.
I like it so far, it’s easy to read and gives a lot of eye openers on behaviour and how to change it.
I’m goinig to start this day as good as I can. I will finish my coffee, get dressed and make a long walk before I start at work at eleven.
I love being in nature, it loads my battery!
A few hours off day 16…feels like 100. Decided to teach myself how to macrame and I must say, it’s pretty good way to keep the mind focused on the present. Here’s my first wall hanging I made for a friend. YouTube has great videos to learn.
Coffee. Feeling a lot better this morning. Might have something to do with my 5 day mini vacation that just began . A bit of time for myself. Need that. Therapy tomorrow and scattering my mum’s ashes on Sunday, some cycling and going to the gym in between. Will try to pick up mindfulness. Write a little bit. Cuddle with Luna. Will get through my free time just fine. Sober and clean.
There’s no place for stupid drinking and drugging in my life no more. Never again. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Love from the flower garden close to my work. Still overflowing with beauty.
@Misokatsu 400 Flo! Huge numbers friend! Congrats and hugs. @Charlie_C 10 months yay you Charlie! @SoberWalker Jay may think like a monk, he doesn’t look like one… . Hope you had a nice walk friend.
OMG. I can relate to this. My wife did not quit and since I’ve gotten sober, the dynamics of our relationship has changed. I wonder if sometimes I drank to be “with” her because now I see how different we are. I love getting healthy, being active and around people. She prefers to sit on the back steps smoking cigarettes and drinking. Most evenings she is out there while I sit in front of the tv alone. I hope she sees the light because her health is going. We are both in our early 60’s and the years of abuse have worn us both down. After 2.5 months though I am feeling rejuvenated. Lost 20#, lowered my A1C, and BP and feeling 10 years younger.
Rewarding yourself with a peaceful night off full of self care is just the best, isn’t it?! Looking forward to it during the day is like magic. I still can’t believe what is happening in my life/head.
Checking in with 38 mornings not drunk, hungover or waiting for the liquor store to open at 0900. Waking up early is still weird. I’ve started to see regulars on my morning walk-jogs and that’s kinda neat, we don’t talk, just throw up a howdy hello hand sign. I’m off now to a morning meeting, coffee then beachtime.
Thank you Emm!!! And no I haven’t heard from him in a long time. I had messaged him a few months back and have never gotten a response. I hope he’s ok.
Day 413
Finally got a call back from my doctor yesterday. Confirmed my torn meniscus. His schedule is filling up with the end of the year approaching so planning for surgery come January. I’ll get to enjoy a little bit of playing in the snow then before post op recovery starts.
Mum’s surgery is in a month and luckily falls on the start of one of my off weeks so I’ll be going with and hanging at the hotel with my stepdad, helping with the dogs, and staying at her house the entire week after.
For now everything is idle waiting — watching leaves change color while the nights get colder, harvesting and preserving the garden, and staying sober.
Congrats on 413 Jess.
FWIW. My recovery from my torn meniscus repair. If it’s a repair you’re having, was pretty easy. Wasn’t bad at all. I’m glad you can be available for your mom for her surgery.
Checking in
626 days substance free
8 days sugar free
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all of our affairs
NA is a spiritual program of action in order to stay clean I need to be out there helping others stay clean too. When I cleaned up in 2005 I thought that would be my next job, an addictions counselor. Little did I know that I had 12 more years left in the clutches of active addiction. I didn’t understand addiction 16 years ago, I didn’t understand myself. Through doing a set of steps and going to meetings, sharing my story there, here; I am learning a lot. I am growing daily, it blows me away at times.
Last night I managed to do something I could have never done 2 years ago. For many years my anxiety was so bad I couldn’t leave my house most days. On the days I did leave my house I would be drunk and still have panic attack after panic attack needing to pull over while driving, sit down in grocery stores, I could not function. I couldn’t go to people’s houses, my life was awful. Now my life is amazing and last night I was able to stand infront of a room FULL of addicts at a podium with a MICROPHONE and share at a treatment center as a guest speaker.
I was super nervous and started doubting myself as soon as I saw how massive the set up was. Feelings of being unworthy and not having a strong enough message started flooding me. I managed to pray for guidance and meditated my anxiety away. Everything ended up being fine.
We are all capable of recovering if we put every damn thing we have left into it.
@carlito2 wow, all those addictions at once, congrats on all those 2s @ShesGotMoxie sorry to hear this, sending prayers and strength @Rockergirl92 sending strength @ChristineCarol congrats on your week @Charlie_C congrats on 10 months @JustAlys congrats to your, your sister and her bf on triple digits @Claartje congrats on a sober vacation @Wakikki congrats on 40 days You’re gonna be so proud on your birthday night when you go to sleep sober
@Its_me_Stella thank you and what you did last night is huge! So proud of you. I’m still in the place you were in 2 years ago, slowly putting some feelers out with grocery shopping and exercising (until 5 weeks ago), so I can recognise how far you have come, you are amazing
401 days no alcohol.
369 days no cocaine.
7 days no disordered eating.
Today I hoovered all the bedding then washed it. Put clean bedding on. D-ehaired the cat’s blanket. I also had a shower and went for my scan. I know the next part is the stressful part because I have to make lots of phonecalls to ensure my results get to my GP, then from my GP to the Podiatrist, then I need an appointment with the NHS Podiatrist before my appointment with the private surgeon on the 27th. If I can’t get it all sorted in time, I’ll ask if I can postpone the private appointment.
I’m feeling unusually happy today, so I’m just enjoying it
. A bit of time for myself. Need that. Therapy tomorrow and scattering my mum’s ashes on Sunday, some cycling and going to the gym in between. Will try to pick up mindfulness. Write a little bit. Cuddle with Luna. Will get through my free time just fine. Sober and clean.
. Hope you had a nice walk friend.
