You, my friend, are a gift ! I’m glad you let your feelings out and I’m glad today is another day of probably not today.
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We need you here and present, Pal. That’s the fucking point. 
You had a really bad day and the shenanigans are piling up with your Love. Sending out as many good vibes as I can spare. Luv ya, Eric. See ya around the gratitude table.
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Checking in, grateful that we are getting closer to COVID vaccines for kiddos so that my niece who has a heart condition can spend more time with her cousins. I’m happy that her maternal family had finally all gotten vaccinated and she has been able to see them more lately. She has spent the first two years of her life in a small bubble of family who is willing to take precautions and she deserves better. I am struggling with some thoughts and feelings related to the political state in my country while trying to keep my generally optimistic self intact - sometimes we have to go through shit to come out the other side better off, huh? Anyway, the thing I’m really happy about this morning is that we had a big weather shift in the last 24 hrs and I. DO. NOT. HAVE. A. MIGRAINE! This is huge! Whatever I’m doing seems to be working. Awesome.
Edit to say I just found out my SIL’s niece has COVID, she is 11. She has flu like symptoms so far, fingers crossed for little Susie, and appreciate any good vibes.
Much love, amigos. 
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I have been a bit behind the thread and feeling like I can’t catch up, but at least you I want to reply to personally. The point is YOU. The lovely you that supports people so much on here, and obviously loves your wife so much that you are worrying about her. I am sorry you are struggling now. Just goes to show there are peaks and troughs for all of us. I guess you have to take the great advice you are usually handing out. It does feel unfair sometimes. But do you really want to be the sloppy asshole? Especially when you know you can be better than that. I know you don’t.
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8 days now. Been getting better at resisting. Definitely still have the desire to that’s for sure. Take each day one step at a time.
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Before anything else, I want @Dazercat to know he is loved. I love you, Eric. I’m happy when I see you overflowing with support for everyone here, and I’m also happy when I see you letting go of your own crap so we can work through it together. I’m sorry you’re hurting. My heart hurts with you, and I pray for you and Kelly every day. 
Today, I’m 70 days sober. That means…
- 70 days of hangover-free mornings
- 70 days of getting to know myself better
- 70 days of reminding myself that I am not my thoughts
- 70 days of being present for my family
- 70 days of making conscious decisions
- 70 days of remembering the previous day
- 70 days of reading and retaining the words
- 70 days of mindfulness
- 70 days of facing my emotions
- 70 days in on becoming a better me
I’ve been feeling pretty low the past few days, but I’m still holding on to my belief that life will get better. Much love to y’all for being here.
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Day 496 clean and sober today and official 3 months I’ve been at my job!!! Not one day missed, wow… I used to not be able to hold a job for more than a couple weeks at the most due to my drinking and using. Feels really good. Have a beautiful day everyone, love you guys! I’m getting ready for work so I didn’t see your post @Dazercat I just saw @ShesGotMoxie’s post that you were hurting. Sending huge hugs to you bro, love you Eric!!! 
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19 days 23 hours. Today I will be 20 days sober. I feel really good, my brain is still sick and twisted. But my conscious wins over my subconscious today.
Have the best day y’all!
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@Dazercat i hear you. It’s hard and frustrating to watch someone you love stuck in the cycle that we worked so hard to get out of. It’s hard not to be angry at them and think “ why do I have to do all the work alone”. And I wish there was something I could do to help with the feelings you are having. The quote “ do the best you can until you know better- then when you know better do better” or something close to that stays in my head a lot. We know better now- we can never go back to that. And I know you don’t want to. But it sucks sometimes.
I hope you slept good, and your back feels good today so you can power walk, maybe with some angry rap music:wink:. See you on the gratitude thread
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I don’t know what the point is. I do know the alternative is much much worse. And you know it too. Hope venting helped Eric. Have as good a day as you can. BTW, nothing wrong with being an asshole every now and then. Just don’t drink. There is certainly no point to that. Love ya friend.
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Here is the quote from one of the most amazing people I got to see speak in person.
I love this. Thank you for sharing, Sunflower. You caught the essence. Sending @Dazercat Eric a big hug. It’s so hard to go through this journey with a partner that drinks and to want the best for them.
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Heyyy guys checking in day 454 sober.
This place keeps me sober. Reading all your posts keeps me sober. So thank you everyone for coming here and sharing.
Still lonely. I got tired of complaining about it but lately I can go whole days without any human interaction. I mean, I go to meetings sometimes but I don’t really share and I go to my work out classes and tell the instructors how amazing they are, and that’s it for me. But I am just gonna keep going. I am not going to think about it too much. Maybe today is the day. I’ve been trying harder to smile at people, I realize that takes strength. I am so thankful for all of you.
Also, coming up on one year since my best friend passed away from overdose. I miss her a lot. I could tell when the weather started to change that all these feelings were coming for me.
Anyway, coffee is made! Time to start my day.
Great job everyone! 
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Checking in on day 2. I’m going to be honest whatever happens. I’m back. Feeling good overall, clear-minded, confident, determined, focussed, conscious… Nothing can take the present away from me! Here we are family, one day at a time. Life is what it is, and we find ourselves in it for a spark of time with infinite questions and answers, who are we…? You’ll see my ups and downs, I’m just human, but persistence makes perfect! 
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Thanks Rosa!
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“DAY 2”
My mindset is still strong with the despise and hate I have for drugs. I’m so sick of that shit and what’s its done to me and my life etc. Got into abit of an argument last night with hubby about money. Our financial struggle/debt is realistically due to drug use. This is another huge reason to stay on track and that’s what I told him… things are only going to get worse if we continue to spend hundreds n hundreds n hundreds of dollars on stupid shit. Anyway, this put me in a mental funk last night and waking up this morning. I wanted to eat crappy comfort food this morning “thinking” it would make me feel better (it definitely wouldn’t… and would make me feel shitty physically and mentally). So I didn’t. I’m sticking to my 16:8 intermittent fasting like I planned and will eat healthy at noon. All I wanted to do this morning was to lay in bed and sleep to forget my issues. Not doing that either. What good would that do for me. I decided to get up n go on TS 1st with my coffee. Going to do my 5 min guided meditation and my affirmation for today. Then I will go from there and take my next steps. It’s when I’m in a funk, that I NEED to take action the most. My 1st instinct is to either “fix” my issue with something that quick n easy or to “forget” it by sleeping it away. I’m making changes to my life and how I do things. I’m reprogramming my brain and way of thinking. Not falling into this trap again. Hope you all have a wonderful day/night! Will be back on again soon
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Congrats on day 2! I’m on day 2 as well feeling in a funk mentally about other things but confident and sure of my desire to quit drugs. Glad to see u posting too!
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I’m so happy to see you back, lady! Get after it, it sounds like you have a good plan.
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Eric! Hugs my friend! Let that shit out!! 
You are staple in this community and are always here for us! We get it, we get you! Thoughts, prayers, good vibes! Whatever it is you need I’m sending your way!
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- Thinking of everyone that is struggling. Life can be hard and exhausting. Just know you’re not alone! Quick check-In lots to do today. Have to finalize my presentation so I can present to my super tomorrow. Before I present to Council
. Nerves…nerves…nerves 
! Have a blessed day TS fam 
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So glad to hear u sharing about what’s going on. I’m sorry to hear things are tough right now. I do remember when I did have my 3 years clean (many years ago), that I remember feeling this way. It’s a shitty place to be in 
But as you probably know… drinking/using definitly doesn’t get rid of the problem and in fact makes things worse. You probably have so much more knowledge than I do use that recovery toolkit and everything that’s in it to help you get through this. This too shall pass and you will be so happy that you didn’t drink. Hugs my friend 
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