Mhm I know a lot of people who stop doing meth and start taking ephedrine to stay “high”. Basically what you are doing.
Love the self awareness you have it is spot on. Super happy you are catching yourself doing that shit. It’s so easy to over look.
Congrats on your days.
Have you tried doing a loving kindness meditation in this situation? Maybe it would help you.
Hey darlin’ 
I’m sorry you felt yucky yesterday. How are you feeling today? Sending you some love and hugs. 
Morning! Just thought if check in on ya 
hope u had a good rest! 
I’m feeling much better today 
. A sweet freaking angel (Stella) messaged me and let me vent to her last night. I didn’t even go to sleep sad.
How are you feeling? How is your son? I was thinking of you this morning. I hope you were able to get some rest after the other night.
Thank you for the hugs and checking in on me
Hi BMW 
I am feeling worlds better Thank you for checking in on me. I just needed to let out some negative feelings, process them, and get a good nights sleep.
How are you doing today?! I saw your coffee and pre- work out ready to go for this morning! I will be doing some yoga inside later today as it’s pretty rainy and gloomy here.
Congrats on day one Let’s both get through today 
A study was done years ago on the common ground of any form of addiction and the process of recovery and the common denominator was ‘A childish defiance’. We want want want and we don’t want to do anything about it, we don’t want to try. I was quite happy living life on my terms until one day I woke up and decided I didn’t like what I had anymore. It was a very long time from that day until the day I woke up years later and thought “actually I might have to change a few things I don’t really want to”, Eventually I realised the only thing I had to change was ME.
How are you doing? Feeling any better?
I’m doing much better today. I’m on my way out of the mountains to go to the “big city” today. It’s a 2-1/2 hour drive, so a fun road-trip with my hubs. I talked with my son earlier this morning, and he’s doing really well. He has a good attitude, so that makes me happy.
I’m so glad you got to vent and went to sleep without sadness. I find that when I go to sleep carrying a burden I usually wake up with it. It’s best to get that out.
I feel this big time. The worst resentments I carry usually stem from this type of bullshit, and it’s just that - bullshit - but in the moment it feels huge. I wish I knew why that was. Hope you get some stuff crossed off and some bites outta that pesky elephant, amiga.
Day 1, it can only get better from here!
I love road trips. Especially in Colorado. Some of my favorite memories are driving up to little mountain downs or hiking trails. Have fun with your hubs.
Big congrats on your 60 days, Ryan!!! 
Great work!
P.S. Your “grumpy” beard needs it own social media page! It looks awesome!
My ex wife just dropped our daughter. The thing is, when you got a kid, you can’t get away from your ex. And when you’re stupid enough to still love your ex, it’s… tricky to say the least. Gonna try to keep it strong, breath a lot and put something else, well, anything else in my mind. Oh boy what a mess
That’s a tough spot to be in 
Hope ur able to distract enough so that you have a good day
Day 0 on my PMO addiction.
I’m feeling down but I’m doing this. I want to reach one year.
I’m so freaking tired of this addiction taking over my life.
We went to the Autumn craft fair and I ate a bunch of gluten and spicy dips.
So, physically I feel like shit (and later I should have a good ol’ psoriasis flare-up) but mentally much better. I like hanging out with my kiddo and the kid likes hanging out with me. That’s pretty special at 17 years old.
Checking in and keeping sober. Going to be a sober weekend off work. Hope you all are having a great friday!
Blast from the past…my friends were obsessed! Probably contributed to some hearing loss 
days milestone! 