That sounds super stressful! Well done for staying strong and sober through out it. I hope that your husband feels better soon. 
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Me too! As stressful as it is, im grateful that we have an answer for his pain. And we know have to just keep on for a solution and follow thru. Dental here in Alberta is from what I know, is the highest in Canada. Where my hubby is from its aprox $50/tooth. Here for an uncomplicated tooth pull ots $150/tooth. Crazy. Thank u for ur support!
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Thanks Jenny. I like the saying as well. I always feel so ridiculously moany compared to people who have kids keeping them busy haha. I think I need to be up around 6.30 to get into London on time for my appointment!
Good luck getting to bed! 
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Good morning everyone from Adelaide Australia. 95 days sober here and naturally awake at 6am which has been happening a bit lately. Itās strange as all my life Iāve been a sleepy head in the morning and now Iām happy and excited to greet the day!
I hope you all have a fantastic day/night where ever you all are 
š¼
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Dental care is ridiculously expensive. I think last time my dentist offered a payment plan. I have to do that with almost everything these days as Iāve been out of work. Iām not sure if itās an option for you, but it definitely helps take the pressure off.
I like your positive attitude too. I hope the pain stops soon for him 
š¼
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The last few days dragged a bit as the excitement mounted, but what do you know, Iāve got 30 clean days! BUT hey
self going forward, just so you know there is no time ever for cockiness or āstinking thinkingā I am in a complete state of surrender. 30 days and 10 minutes. I love all of you.
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Oh, yes please. 
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Hey Everyone. I checked in earlier today, but today has been a day of nightmares. So stressful. So much to do in such a short amount of time. It is currently taking everything inside of me right now to not walk away from the computer and go get something to drink. Ugh, this is a hard one today.
It does make feel a little better just to vent here for a moment everyone. Iām trying guys!
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I am sorry you have had a stressful day, I know that would be a massive trigger for me. Well done for coming here. Just try and keep in your mind that staying sober actually helps, everything else will make it worse. It may temporarily mask the problem, but it just delays/exacerbates it. It really sucks but sitting with your feelings sober is the best way of dealing with it now and moving on. Keep talking here if helpful.
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Ooh that sounds like a lot going on and oh my gosh you didnāt take an extra pill through all that yay for you!!!
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Checking in
Day17
Day is getting better 
things have really slowed down here. Got a few things taken care of so far. And then Iām finally going to do my morning routine 
(at 245pm). But thatās ok. Iām tired but will make sure to schedule in time for myself. Thays literally the only way I get time for me someday is if I schedule it in lol
How is everyone else doing? Hope u all are okay
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So glad youāre feeling better and I hope you got a chance to eat something too!
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Iām sorry I have not checked in the last couple of days but I have been sober !
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Congratulations Callie! I didnāt see this soonerā¦ well done on your 5 months! 
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I wish Iād be able to get out of bed at 6:00 am full of energy and with a big smile on my faceā¦ I have 2 alarms; my alarm clock and my mobile. I overuse the snooze option on both! 
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1000
No coffee as I write this one at night for a change. I canāt wait for the morning, have to post now, Iām so proud of myself. This is one of the really big ones for me. First I made it to 1 day, then to 10, to 100, and now 1,000. 10,000? Thatās more then 24 years away. Who knows? But Iām here now! 1,000 One days at a time.
I know itās one day at a time and all that matters is today. We have to make the days count instead of counting the days. A thousand days today can easily be zero days tomorrow. All true. Still. For me saying out loud that Iām proud of myself, saying this is something really great that I achieved, thatās really big for me. I couldnāt do that before. Never ever.
I do all this for the boy pictured below. That boy is me. I lost myself right around the time that picture was taken. I couldnāt handle what was happening with me, to me, inside of me. I grew isolated and lonely. I was lost and it took me 45 years to find myself back.
Within a year or two after that picture, I discovered drugs and booze. They gave me an escape from the constant pain and confusion I felt. Another year later sex gave me an added escape. Anything to numb and escape my feelings. It worked for a while. Fifteen years at the most.
After that, drinking and using still made me not feel my true feelings. But instead of numbness a knot of anxiety and terror started growing in my stomach. A knot that got so big through the years that I was totally consumed by it. It was all I could feel. I wasnāt able to discern my own true feelings or the feelings of others. The anxiety and terror inside me got so overwhelming I started seriously thinking about suicide.
Iām not really sure what made me decide to quit, other than that I knew that the road I was on would lead to my untimely death. I had no idea what my live without substances would look like. I just jumped in and gave it a go. I knew from quitting smoking some years prior that I needed my peers to succeed. I found this place. The rest is history right.
Well, it isnāt quite that easy. Recovery is a verb. I tried AA. Really not my scene. I tried NA and got about halfway through doing 90 meetings in 90 days. A couple of groups were really nice and more my scene but the 12 steps and the basic philosophy just isnāt me. Iām also a bit of a loner, or better said I grew into a loner through my boyhood experiences and consequent decades of using. I never felt at ease in groups.
What worked for me was this place. Easier to keep a bit of distance, which was good for me feeling safe, but at the same time itās a huge reservoir of true humans, of true human contact. People with comparable stories and experiences to mine. This place saved me. You all saved me. Some of you have become very close. You are all my friends. Every last one of you. Forever in all your debt.
But not just this place has done it for me. Being sober and clean has given me the possibility to finally go into therapy and take something away from it too. To finally learn and grow a bit. Weāre nearing the end of our 60 session group therapy and I am beginning to see the progress I made.
The knot in my stomach is still there at times, but it has shrunk considerably. I can actually feel feelings, true feelings, happy feelings and sad feelings, without the knot keeping me from feeling them. As a consequence I can also see feelings of other people, begin to understand some of their motivations. To truly empathize. I never could do that. I can also see the boy right here below, the eleven year old me, I can finally see and hear him, see the real me. I can feel my pain and confusion but also my will to live, my strength, my grit, the love I have to give.
Sobriety has given me all that and much more. And thereās much more to come I am sure just as long as I keep working it one day at a time. I have given myself sobriety. And Iām goddamned proud of that. And I am absolutely sure you can all have it, just as long as you really truly want it and you work your asses off to get it. Nothing good comes for free but itās goddamned worth it I tell you! Weāre in this together.
No excuses for the long post. Thanks for reading. Hereās to the next 9,000. Love.
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I am now actually I got some things sorted out and I am finally eating going to do a few things for me now Hope ur doing well too girl!
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So much love for you, mi amigo! Congratulations. Iām so proud of you and so grateful to truly call you friend.
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