Wow congrats Dan!!! 300 days is remarkable 
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Thx. Still trying to figure out whats causing it. Temp, vomiting, very high pulse, and lethargic. She is in the right place to be taken care of
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Thinking of you today Anne. I hate not knowing stuff and I can relate to that anxious, nervous feeling. I hope the results are not too bad. Ur already doing good things for ur body by not adding toxic substances into it. The body is remarkable and does heal over time 
Wishing u all the best today!
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She absolutely is. They have everything she needs there to be safe thru this illness. Hoping she has a quick recovery. And How are u doing?
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Day 30ā¦ What a milestone!!! 
Despite that, my mindfulness has been in a scary freefall since around two evenings ago when unexpected cravings (up until then amazingly controlled) brought me 99% to the verge of relapse that night as I mindlessly thought of and even browsed nothing but fire for many hours too many. Iām still here and clean thanks to that 1%. Severely weakened by it all though somehow. As if Iāve already betrayed myself by allowing myself to go so deep mentally and āmay as well just give myself that final push overā now that my headspace feels personally hurt and disappointed. Emotions are unfounded but powerfulā¦ Growing up, my addictions were all I knew as a servere stress coping mechanism. Iām seriously affraid. I donāt know what to doā¦ I saw my psychologist yesterday for less than 30mins after 3 weeks due to unavailability on her behalf or an overlapping work schedule on mine. I feel rough, despite in theory still being abstinent and crossing that long elusive bloody month mark after a monumental comeback from the dark places I was still in so shortly before then! But nowā¦ Iām struggling and pretty much totally alone to make or break myself - at will. Yesterday all my troubles seemed so far away 
Hehhā¦ Why? Eff it. Eff this self-loathing and doubting shit! Temporary escape isnāt worth a lost life. If not now, my tomorrowās self will only be the sameā¦ And time is, well, literally everything we have! I will survive!! I am my biggest gift and hope! 
Iām grateful I wrote this - and wish you an awesome weekend, fam!
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Really, REALLY proud of you! Ur proving to urself that u can get thru deep and dark times and come out victorious! Even tho ur mind is saying uv betrayed urself for entering a dark place, you didnt u didnāt relapse and u got to 1 month!!! Excited for you and happy to read ur post!!!
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Day 630 clean and sober today. I hope everyone has a great day today, love you guys!!! 
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Sounds like youāre trying to do all the right things. Iām glad you got it talk to someone. Iām glad you were able to share. Stay strong and connect if you need to 
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Checking in
Day18
Woke up in a decent mood. After 4 night of taking my new meds, I have noticed a huge change in the stability of my moods, my energy, my positivity, and even my memory! They are helping me which ultimately aids in my recovery (along with the skills I know that help).
I decided to change up my morning routine. Iām adding meditation 1st thing before my readings and prayer. Iām hoping that meditation sort of sets the stage for a more deeper connection during prayer.
I am also incorporating light stretches in the morning too. Then yoga and exercise at home. Once I get my butt out of bed at 530 am for the actual gym in the building, then Iāll change it up again. But for now I need to get that healthy habit of exercise going.
Hubby has another appt this afternoon for his teeth. So hoping that goes well.
And then Iām excited for tomorrow! We are attending that art exhibit in the afternoon (Michelangelos Sistine Chapel Exhibit).
Cruising along to the 20 day clean mark. Iām soooo excited to get past that 25 days I had earlier this year. Trying to staying in the moment but I am excited. Just donāt want to self-sabotage.
Have a great Friday everyone!
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Glad your day is starting off pretty good. Iām excited for you to get back to the 25 day Mark too 
happy Friday and good luck with your husbandās dental appointment!
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Hey guys. checking in day 39.
Had a nice session in the gym today but a bit tired.
@KevinesKay Hey man. Hope you are doing well and congrats on getting 4 months clean.
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Thatās very scary @Frank68!! Glad to hear sheās in the right place to get specialized treatment if needed. Weāre here for you, my friend.
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Amen. Beautiful gratitude list and acknowledging all thatās coming to you as you remain teachable, full of gratitude and willing to be open and transparent.
Thanks for warming my heart and head today.
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Thank you so much!!! Means a lot to get this kind of support!!
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2nd round of interviews was a success. I was immediately asked to return to a final interview next week. Iām hoping their enthusiasm with bringing me back so quickly is a positive sign. Time to hit Legs in the gym and hang out with the miniās later. Have a wonderful day everyone.
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Thank you so much!!! I appreciate the support more than you know, or maybe you do know! 
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I truly used this breathing thing when I saw it. So nervous but itās better to know than not, and hopefully itās nothing major and just making these sober changes is what I needed most! Thank you!!! 
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I do understand to an extent I think I had my addition of issues when it came to using. Issues with my nerves and skin sensitivity (which i still have), and then I had severe issues with stomach stuff (ulcers), a detached retina in my right eye years ago that needed surgery (the dr said to was due to drug use but idk 
), and then brain stuff from meth use years agoā¦but the body heals, even the brain to an extent. As long as we stop the damage to our bodies and give it the nutrients and good foods and lots of water that it needs, it really seemed to help. But not knowing whatās going on when ur suffering is the WORST! And thatās why I felt ur pain. Cuz that kind of stuff can rent space in our heads. Have faith that things will be okay. Ur doing the right next right step by seeking help!
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Hey everyone. Day 5 here. Iām partially glad and partially not glad it is Friday. Weekends are the big drinking times for me. I mostly spend my weekends sleeping and drinking and nothing else really. So I am a little anxious for that, but today has been a big day for cravings because of work. I have this throbbing headache right now making things feel worse. But I wanted to come on here and post first before I let myself do anything stupid. Posting here helps hold me accountable and it does make me feel better knowing I have this community.
Iām going to try to do a little meditation and then get back to the nightmare that is my Friday work. Have a great day everyone!
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Itās not nice when you feel tired all the time. How are you sleeping?
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