Felt a little disappointed, that my daily 30 minutes mindfulness meditation became a 30 minutes distraction. Which of course, is fine. It is what it is, the mind is hard to calm down sometimes.
So I started being mild and kind to myself, remembering myself how completely different I deal with things now, compared to before I started this journey.
Actually, I’m kind of proud of it. Normally, I would have felt and absorbed the tensions present in others, without being able to understand what those tensions were, where they came from, even unable to notice they are there untill they started boiling inside. After which I would try to cool them with beer untill I finally would simply implode or have a meltdown.
As always, I would definately have empathy - but as always, I would have been unable to reckognise it for what it was, let alone respond properly to it.
Instead, I knów I’m having a difficult time dealing with the situation on board right now. I knów why that is, whý I feel distracted easily and I am facing it. Sober. Without meltdown or implosion.
I’ve grown. Still a work in progress, but proud and happy with how far I’ve come along so far.
Love all your city shots! Beautiful streaks of light in this one. And very true that anyone can be in situations they never imagined themselves in…good to feel small sometimes.
Day 172 I just wanted to seriously say thank you everyone for all of your positive and helpful feed back, I have the hardest time going through and tagging everyone on my phone it is a pain trying to go back and finding who to tag. But you all seriously help me keep pushing along with my girls, and I will definitely take alot of your guys advice, I do need try meetings and stop being afraid to go out or my house. I do need to be more active and love myself and stop caring and worrying what others think. Love y’all hope you good days much love
Still sitting in my sweats, haven’t moved from the couch. Did a devotion and read my Big Book. Trying not to think of work which is hours away, but I’m just so anxious.
Grateful for all of the individuals I’ve met here on this forum. Today is the anniversary of my wife’s mother death. I’m doing my best to support her during this time. I’m going to get her flowers and maybe try to cook dinner tonight.
Thinking about how I can continue to think positive affirmations and thankfulness to God for everything I’ve been given. I want to try to maintain a sense of gratitude all day. I NEED good days. I feel like I haven’t had a really good day in some time. Reading the threads on this forum really help.
Checking in, day 513 no alcohol, day 23 no cigarettes. Enjoying solitude in my old ’bachelor flat’ in Budapest. I have to settle some official stuff that I dislike and also have a lot of work, but besides that I’m feeling ok.
Checking on day 17, a crazy Sunday.
Hello Dears, after a beautiful spring time with much outdoor activity and grill lunches, we woke up to zero C temperature and snowing. All our fruit trees have been in blossom, I guess it just killed them all. The cats behave insanely, loud, grumpy and unpredictable are all 5 of them. I endured a lot of cravings, did many unnecessary small chores just to keep my hands busy. Had way too many coffees, now I am worried about nighttime rest. Tomorrow I have to get up at 4 am to arrive on time at the morning class in the gym. It will be awful I know, returning to the coach and fellas after 4 months of absence. It is not the first time though. I packed my training bag already. Performance will be miserable for sure. Now my daughter wishes to watch Tom&Jerry movie with, so we will do so.
Congrats on making it to three weeks, you’re doing a great job. I am not sure if meditation is a part of your recovery or not but it sure helps me get back into the present moment. Anxiety usually happens because we are looking into the future…
I use an app called Insight Timer for my meditations or there are plenty on youtube.
You can always join us on the meditation thread too.
Szia! Örülök, hogy újra itt vagy, és gratulálok a 17 naphoz! Az eleje nagyon nehéz tud lenni, de az itteni emberekre mindig számíthatsz. Ha bármiben tudok segíteni, szólj nyugodtan.
What a beautiful way to show support to ur wife. I’m sure she will appreciate it very much. I feel like ur doing all the right things my friend. U are making changes daily in hopes to see a positive result. I feel like with consistent daily effort, results will happen. I have found that some days are just better than others and sometimes it takes time to really see that change. But ur doing it! Our minds have been wired to think a certain way for soooo long. It will take time for our brains to be re-wired/trained to think a diff way. But today will be a good day
And also!!!.. congratulations on 3 whole weeks!!!
