Day 248 of not a single drop of alcohol… life is good. I’ll have a houseful today, and I’m actually looking forward to it. I’m grateful for Keely and her peeps staying the weekend and pitching in to help. Having a house filled with wonderful people, great conversations, laughter, and good food is my happy place.
I wish you all happiness and peace. Happy Easter to those of you who celebrate. I love my sober tribe. Y’all have a beautiful day.
Happy Easter, Michael! I’m glad you’re having a laidback day. @michaeljlogan74
@michaeljlogan74 I am so grateful that you are apart of this community also! You have alot of valuable input that u post here and it’s amazing to ur journey also! Way to go on working thru the “work thots” while not working. Stressful work environments can rent alot of space in the head and u deserve ur time away from the place…physically and mentally. Hope ur day is amazing my friend! @Charlie_C I slept awful too!!! Haha drinking coffee as we speak! Hope ur day improves!!
Morning Check in Day 62
Grateful to have woken up clean and sober. Feeling grateful and blessed for another day to make a difference. Was anxious about work tho bcuz my client doesn’t handle holidays well and I didn’t sleep well last night at all… strange dreams, along with just not having the energy to deal with extreme behaviors today. It’s not her fault, I am just not feeling as prepared to handle what I am used to having to handle. Anyway… positive thoughts create positive outcomes
Making Shephards Pie tonight for supper… its truly one of my favorite home cooked meals. And maybe do something for Easter also tonight idk.
Hope everything enjoys Easter (if u celebrate in 1 way or another) and that u all have an addiction free day!
Hugs!!!
1565. Asking for prayers! My sister showed up last night. I’m already seeing a difference in the kids. Not only that, Im dealing with my leg injury but now her too. They are different kids around their Mom. They cry and whine about everything. She doesn’t make them listen and when I discipline them she’ll jump in and start as well. Then they get confused. I’ve asked her not to interfere but she doesn’t listen. Then when she leaves, I pick up all of the pieces their broken hearts and we do our best to move on. It breaks my heart every time. I work hard to keep them on their schedule and she somehow messes it up every time. I also feel like she comes on Holidays after I’ve prepared a great time for them and she tries to take the credit for all of it. This time wasn’t planned trip either she came because she has a $1,000 check at her Grandmas and is the main reason she’s here (she didn’t give any to help with the kids either). She even told the oldest she won’t be here Monday to get her ready for school but she’ll get her ready before she leaves to go back Tuesday. This is just hard for me. September will be one year that they’ve been with my full time. I feel so protective of them and want only for them to be happy. I am working on acceptance. I need to accept that it gets this way when she comes and I have to deal with it for a couple days and then we can go back to us.
Sorry for being a drag on Easter but this is hard for me. Have wonderful day TS family! I’m going to do my best to get through these next couple of days. Thank you all for your well wishes! I am truly grateful for you all!
Awe this sounds sooo incredible hard. I feel for those kids and for u too It sounds like u care sooo much for their health and happiness. I really have no advice as I have never been in ur shoes, but I am truly hoping that everything works out for u today… (hugs)
Happy Easter everyone.
Checking in early on Sunday
3rd sober Easter.
2 years 15 weeks no booze for this guy.
I wrote on the gratitude thread the other day that I’m grateful I know that one drink. One lousy fucken drink. That first drink. BAM Will change my Whole World. I really thought about that. My whole world would be changed if I pick up just one drink.
It scares the shit out of me. I’m grateful for my healthy fear of my addiction.
I’m not drinking today. And I’m probably not drinking tomorrow. And I welcome anyone to join me if you’re willing.
That’s sounds really difficult. I have not been in your exact situation but I do know what its like to feel like this…
It tears at my heart when i see my daughter hurting, especially when I know that if it was up to me and only me I feel this heartache could be completly avoided. I also know that’s kids are amazingly resilient and they also pick up on our emotions. There were so many situations (especially when my daughter was younger but still today) when I try to protect her from certain comments other family members would make or the way my husband deals with her that I feel is so ineffective. I feel it actually does damage to her happiness well-being and confidence at times but I also know that when I step in to try to fix it it always makes things worse. My Daughter senses that I’m stressed out and one thing I’ve tried to remind myself is that my daughter is going to deal with people like that and comments like that her entire life. She’s going to get knocked off her routine her confidence is going to get shocked her heart is going to get broken. She struggles with her body image and it just makes me want to cry but instead of taking on her emotions I try to step back and know that it’s okay for her to hurt it’s okay for her to be uncomfortable. I don’t have to fix it all I have to do is be there to give her a hug when she needs it and to listen. This probably isn’t at all the same as your situation but it got me thinking and I thought I’d share. It’s hard to see our kids suffer. Im sorry all this is going on for you I sure hope your leg gets better soon too. That’s got to be so frustrating especially with everything else going on.
I totally understand what your saying. I try not to let it bother me there’s just things I feel like she does intentionally to show she’s still their Mom. For example I change the kids when they first get up. Well this morning she got them up and didn’t change any of theirs diapers which irritates me. But, once I got up and went to change them she jumps in and tries so then they’re pulled in 2 different directions. It confuses them. It just gets hard when she’s here. I know it’s only a couple days and she won’t be back again for months.
My mind is whispering to me. It’s that addict voice saying “what about ____” and pointing to paths I know aren’t good for me.
I’m posting about it here just to get it out, put it in words. Once it’s out of my head it’s easier to see it as separate from me. That voice is there, and I hear it, but I will not go down those unhelpful paths.
Glad you posted your NOPE @Matt
Sorry you are being challenged but glad you posted and are here where you will get support and be accountable. Take care. Stay strong.
Oh sweet Patty, I am not sure there is a soul on this planet who would ever consider you a drag. It must be very difficult with the kids being so young and not really understanding, they just get so confused…
You can only do your best, and on somedays that’s going to look different than on others. That includes practicing acceptance around a situation that affects you on such an emotional level. It’s fricken hard, I always have to let that stuff go over and over again because the more emotionally invested I am the more I want to control shit. ESPECIALLY when my daughter is concerned. I have found though when it has to do with her relationship with her father trying to have her feelings spared was only causing me resentments which were not mine to have. I finally have been able to let go there and instead of accepting his behavior so much, because I find that unacceptable, I have accepted that its not my place to meddle. That’s their relationship and all I can do is be there for her when she needs me. Its my job to the the best mumma I can be.
I really hope that your pain is being managed ok and that you can find a little joy in the holiday.
@michaeljlogan74
Morning Check in
this sounds sooo incredible hard. I feel for those kids and for u too 
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