Thank you so much luv.
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I am thinking of you. It must be extremely stressful. In times like these I try to remind myself that difficult situations often lead to beautiful destinations. Perhaps this must occur for something else to happen for you. Easier said when youāre not in the actual circumstance thoughā¦ But I will keep you in my thoughts and think positive and believe that things will work out the way they are meant toā:heart:
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Omg Iām sooo sorry about all of this!!! I will be praying for u and ur family that this gets dealt with in the right way 
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Hey Michael that sounds like extreme heaviness on your mind and heart. I can imagine having the weight of a family to take care of just adds to that. When things are completely out of my control, as this seems for you, the only thing that can keep me sane is to stay in the present moment. Practicing a lot of mindfulness in a bunch of different ways. Pulling my mind back into the now everytime it wanders off and starts to catastrophize about things I donāt know for sure. Try to just stick with the facts and maybe get outside from some fresh air I bet that pooch of yours would love a walk.
Sending strength and positive energy that everything works out.
Just a side note: sometimes when things like this happen it can seem like the worst thing ever but the reality is if our lives are full there is no room for something new. There is no room for better things unless we make space for them. Keep that in mind because although this feels scary it could very well be a big positive growth moment for you so just hang on tight and have faith.
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I donāt understand the business talk, but I can imagine the stress of losing work, worries about ur familyās future. Sending strength 
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Try not to think worst case scenario, talking with your labor attorney will make things more clear Iām sure.
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Thank you so muchā¦I need to hear this and stay in the present moment. Thank you @Its_me_Stella
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My question is , to my self, as what always happens just before exam time, what the fuck am I doing trying to be a scientist, when I have been a hairdresser that can hardly talk to clients because of my dire social skills and only learnt them of the last 5 years out of 20, so how the fuck can I learn or be or get to where I think I want to be , with a career change so late in Life, trying to forget my drug ridden past, yet have to go through it with āstepworkā (that will bring up old shit from decades earlier) at the same time as getting thru exams as a 40 year old and a mother that has just has just relapsed and not organised Easter holidays properly, and am supposed to study for an exam in 10 days. , What the fuck. What am I doing.
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Chasing your dreams and donāt you dare stop. Recovery is magicā¦ get out of your head and listen to your heart.
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Ditto what Stella said. U are getting out and trying. That is definitely worthwhile. And 40 is not so old! It had better not be as I am also 40 
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Youāre right. Iāll take it ODAAT and stay in the present. I hope to have clarity by the end of the week. Appreciate your wise counsel.
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Iāve had to take my own advice this week. My stress was through the roof and I had to make a decision to change my worst case scenario mindset.
I said a prayer for you, I have a good feeling something good will come for you. 
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Whatās up Mike!!!
Good to see you back on the path!!
Stay strong my friendā:facepunch:
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In the last two years (after getting sober) I was promoted and now had the courage to apply for a new more challenging role. No more barely functional addict for me (or you)!!! I am older than you are, so it is never too late.
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Hello all! Checking in, still technically day 3. My count was off yesterday bc I was not feeling well. My brain felt like mush from this sinus infectionšµāš«. Today was my first day back at work since I quit drinking. As soon as i get home my normal routine is take a shot, figure out dinner. Then continue to drink while I cookā¦ I cook everything from scratch and really enjoy cooking so it takes me at least an hour to get a meal prepared, while drinking the whole time. By the time itās time to eat ive had at least 5 shots and feelin good. Eat, have water with my meal, then sneak more shots until I go to bed, ignoring my partners needs bc im trying to hide my breath and mental state. BUT today!! I decided to jump on this app as soon as I got home, catch up, and make my own post. Iāve been home for almost an hour now and Iām ok. I mean, Iām craving out of habit, but I dont want it if that makes sense. Itās almost like today, the hard part is the muscle memory and not the addiction. Looking forward to day 4!
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7 months today- just realized as I was going to bed 
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I wish you a positiv an also satisfying answer! 
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Day 49 of no self harm
So last night at about 2am my grandpa called saying he had pain bad enough he needed to go the ER. His catheter was loose and pinching him (which i imagine was horribly painful). Waited with him in the ER from about 2:30 until 8am. Once they saw him, they just took his catheter out and did some blood work and all was well. That all took about an hour after 6 hours of waiting.
Anyway, he went home and heās doing good. The antibiotics cleared up the UTI enough already that heās able to pee fine on his own. Heās back to normal, just tired. If I need to though Iāll stay with him during the day tomorrow.
As for me, Iām just tired and frustrated with my family. They just refuse to help and theyāre so selfish. It kills me to realize that my grandpa has to deal with such selfish children after all heās done for them. I worry that Iāll end up like the rest of my family. Thatās my worst fear. I just donāt have very much energy to begin with, and Iām spending the little I have on everything but myself. I havenāt been taking care of myself for weeks.
I was tired enough that I didnāt turn in my homework for this week of school. But I had a full 100% in my class, so I donāt think 40 points will kill my grade. And I still have 5 weeks to get my grade back up.
Something positive is that all the blood work came back as normal for my grandpa. So heās doing better than I thought.
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Iām really happy youāre grandpa is doing better than you might have thought. I wish the rest of the family would step up to the plate! Itās hard when you care so much and others donāt show the same compassion.
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