Good morning all. Checking in on day 260 AF. Suns out but a little colder. Have to bring the pup to the vet today for in my eyes hundred of dollars of unnecessary shots and hours wasted in a vet! But what can I do!? Hope everyone has a good and safe day. Take care.
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Morning Check in
Day 82
Off to work this morning. Had a decent sleep I guess. Spent some time thinking last night about whats going on in my head about my addiction and the crazy thoughts Iāve been having latey and about how much has changed in a little under 3 months.
I feel like my recovery is constantly changing and increasing for the better. Learning new things and opportunities and experiencing life! The disease of addiction however doesnt change for me, yet it will try to convince me that it has. It will always want to see me suffer. It is always sneaky and tries to convince me that it will relax me, reduce my stress, or bring me a sense of joy. It will lie to me saying that I can moderate and be okay. That it provides me with something that I could never find anywhere else being clean. Addiction is that little gremlin waiting outside in the alley for me to open that door just a little bit to let it in. I need to stand firm in my recovery and in my choice to stay clean. As soon as I take 1 of any mind or mood altering susbtance, I give addiction that power and then will have to tame it all over again. I woke up with reassurance about my recovery and a new breath of fresh air, so to speak. I had to re-see addiction for what it really is bcuz it will often try to disguise itself in many forms. My reliance needs to be on my HP always. Lets all get another day in free from our addictions!
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Nice job brother! āEasy does itā as they say. We are going to see better days.
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Hi Kat here checking in on day 276!
At work today but feeling in a great mood, having a good visit with my 15-year-old son. I had showed him my new 9-month keytag a few days ago and yesterday he asked if I had any more, I showed him and he said cool! He has been so supportive of me even though I screwed up so bad as an addict mom. Love my son.
I did break down yesterday and chewed off my nails which had taken a couple weeks to growā¦it was cause of a momentary irritation at scratching my leg while putting on socks. Ah well back on the wagon will let them grow again.
Love and have a great sober Saturday!
Kat
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Haha i know 
I also thought it was very strange to hear that such a day existed
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Stella u are incredible! Ur posts are always so insightful and powerful. I love how you talk about asking others how you are doing. Bcuz ur right we often donāt see the things that may be obvious to others. I love you my friend. Youāre incredibly wise and are so determined to keep ur recovery and grow into the woman u were meant to be. Ur such a strong woman but I believe its bcuz u ask for help and are so open that keeps u this strong. We canāt do this alone and in isolation. I love you lady! Hugs!!
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Day 694 clean and sober today. Didnāt sleep well at all last night but up and off and getting ready to go for a quick hike with a friend. Iām so very proud of everyone here, you all are doing amazing! Super proud of you @Mno thats some tough stuff youāre walking through but then again youāre a really tough person and I look up to you a lot. Also super proud of my sobriety sis @Its_me_Stella, the way you keep consistently moving forward with your recovery is inspiring. @Butterflymoonwoman Iām always proud of you as well, youāre doing it!!! @CATMANCAM, youāre another that I look up too because you never give up and are always so kind, youāre in my thoughts bro! And lastly Iāve never heard of naked gardening day and Iām in the U.S. @LaDyLooNtje but I too am soooo grateful I donāt have to see my neighbors naked 
. Anyway, I hope everyone has a beautiful day today, love you guys!!! 
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Hi all just checking in 11 days sober feeling anxiety fear a lot of pressure bearing down on me life family money house job loss pending court just get overwhelmed at times I really made a mess over many years of wreckage and not learning lessons. Why did my rock bottom have to be so hard Iām so stubborn and thick headed tried to control and will my way in past. I have finally become aware Iām an alcoholic I accept that I have this diseases and accept that my character defects have morphed over many years of this and Iām really trying to surrender everything over to God Iām praying everyday begging for mercy and grace I hope God can look down on me in favor deep down I do have a good heart it has just been so self centered and selfish for so long. Iām trying to change my ways minute but minute. Thank you all for reading, sharing and you all inspire me. Thank you
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So happy to hear that ur son is so supportive. Thatās sooo nice to hear!
Way to go on nig biting ur nails for so long! Did u find that anti-nail biting stuff work?
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Wow, so not into that lol. Thanks for sharing!!!
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Hi @Alycia,
Iām anxious about my first social event with drinking people, too.
I hope you have a good time and stay, that is as long as you feel comfortable!
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@Butterflymoonwoman I did buy some anti-nail biting stuff and it worked great, but only put it on once cause I found it interfered with my eatingā¦
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Hi @michaeljlogan74,
How many LPs do you own?
There must be a lot vinyl.
I hope, that you find the right job that suits you.
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Thank you! It most likely will be at least 6 months to a year before I can actually move out but I finally have a little bit of hope that I wonāt die in this house
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Yay!!! This is amazing! Congratulations 
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Hi @Planipennia 
I try to keep my curated vinyl collection to 400. I use Discogs to manage my collection and buy/sell. I love it! It is a real passion of mine. Thank you so much for asking 
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