Hi everyone. This is my first check in and I’m currently on day 2 of no THC/marijuana. The cravings are pretty bad at the moment, as I have smoked everyday multiple times a day for almost 7 years. I started when I was 19, and now at 26 I can feel the psychological dependence. The worst symptoms I’m having right now is a complete lack of appetite and heavy anxiety. Hanging in there though 
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Way to go @mactune im on day 7 without alcohol and weed. Its possible. Be sure to stay away from temptation and get rid of your stash
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wow that is so amazing and very inspiring. Big congrats
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Checking in at day 250.
What a day! What am I saying…Hell what a week. Beginning of the week everything was like smooth and exactly as planned then shitty things started coming. First I got really sick at a very bad time. I would do the test for the nursing actions, which clearly did not go through. I thought I had learned an important lesson and would take it easy in terms of work but reported better yesterday and went to work. Karma is a bitch because this morning I woke up with no voice, seriously no sound at all. After practicing talking to my dog some noise came out so luckily I was able to go to my meeting this morning but I sounded like I had partied 3 days in a row. Tonight I went to work and my voice got worse and worse until I had to struggle for the sound of a mouse beep and my voice skipped everytime at least when sound came out it was ridiculous. I worked with clients with a very low level and 1 of them laughed at me so glad I was able to make someone happy with it. The message is loud and clear, take better care of myself! Now I have too listen.
Something beautiful has happened in between, no, it’s not just complaining what I do. After the meeting I had a conversation with my sponsor for the first time. We went for coffee and got to know each other. At one point she said to me you’ve been clean for a while but not really in recovery yet. That made me silent. She was right. I do everything by willpower, which I have been able to do for a long time, but still ended up relapsing again and again. I still remember saying to my user friends who I despised by now, I’m going to the clinic and then I’m never going to use again you’ll never see me again. I’m so proud and cocky that for that reason alone I would persist in making that bunch of bastards show what I can do. But that shouldn’t be the reason. I also mentioned that I often hear people struggle with cravings. I don’t have cravings but I know from my past that they can come and when I have them I can’t struggle with them. Then I go down. That’s my biggest fear. It’s going good or bad, nothing in between. So I am grateful for my sponsor with who I made good agreements about working on the 12 steps. This also allows me to make time for this and not act as ridiculous as a workaholic. In a little while I’ll go to bed and I’ll pull everything out of my medicine cabinet eucalyptus, paracetamol, the whole package to make myself understood again tomorrow. And then I hope that tomorrow will be a beautiful, new day/week for everyone!
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Then make 'm stop struggling with you 
Yes, that means working the steps… good luck, you’re not going to regret it !
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Day 7.5 alcohol and weed free. Ive truly only gone this far once before (jan 2022) since I was 14. I am now 34. It’s time for a change. Had a wonderful breakfast with my mom and sister. Then my hubby gave me two mothers day cards. No kids in our future but we have a 2yo shih tzu poodle, Boscoe. And Im proud we’ve kept him alive and thriving this long. Hubby gave me a card from him and one from Boscoe, of course I cried. I love kids so much but made the conscious decision not to pass on our bipolar. The depression is too much at times and I swore I would never put another human being through an ounce of that pain and torment. Life is good. Waiting to hit 10 days…I hear thats when the alcohol is truly out of your system. One day at a time
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I know but that’s the point. From the past I once resisted 2x cravings. The 3rd time I go for the axe. And nothing can stop me, I’ve already made my decision. And that’s scary knowing that I had no problem with it for months before, just like now
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That’s why working a program is so important. It prepares us to deal differently with them. It helps us understand our addictive minds a little better and that understanding, makes a craving less powerful over us.
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Late check in day 229 been out with my daughter all day time fly’s when your having fun 
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Good morning guys 
I’ve reached 40 days today. It’s been a tough week, mentally riding a depressive wave without sleep, and no alcohol to numb my feelings was a tough one but I made it! I’ve had two decent sleeps last two nights. Made it through a sober party (was a bit crap but I attended, stayed sober and feel good for trying).
Reaching 40 days has me hopeful, I realise just how early I am in this journey, this is early days. I’ve got so much ahead. Can’t wait to see how I feel in another 40 days.
Big love, have a great day x
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Day 3 ending it and with a little bit more hope
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Congratulations Dan- What a wonderful gift of 1 year sobriety. Very inspiring!
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Happy Mother’s Day to all Mom’s. I’m a little blue today, my mom passed in 2005, and my 1 son sent me a text, at least it’s something, lol. Made it to day 11!
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Hoping things go well with ur client @Butterflymoonwoman
@AyBee Massive congratulations! Much to be proud of
@Jennajen Glad u know what u want from now
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Checking in-Day 1:
I want to be accountable for my actions. I drank last night (hiding it from my family). This morning my wife found me asleep on the couch and so she intuitively went to the garage and found empty beer cans hidden in my tool box. She was furious 
I ruined Mother’s Day.
I am ruining my relationship with my family.
Honestly, I’ve been faking it and just going through the motions. I am doing work, but it is not sincere and therefore, I am susceptible to relapsing. I am making excuses and being lazy.
I do NOT want to go to rehab….I have to be available for interviews and calls with recruiters. I need to find a job! Going away for 10 days would be devastating to me. I’m so anxious just thinking about it.
My sponsor has told me that I haven’t accepted Step One. My life IS becoming unmanageable.
I’m currently unemployed and not using this time for reflection and healthy habits. All I can think about is putting on my hustle to get a job. Thankfully, my sponsor has given me work to do this week and I’m going to put in the work this week. God knows I have time. I also plan on attending one meeting a day too.
I NEED to put in the work and be serious about my sobriety. It is Life or Death for me. I could lose it all. I’m so disappointed in myself. I’ve been on again, off again for the past nine months.
I ruined Mother’s Day.
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Make the decision right now to commit to it. No more half assed commitment.
Your life is worth it, your family is worth it. Don’t give it all your power.
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If you can’t commit to rehab, how about intensive outpatient treatment? I went for 12 weeks (while working full-time) and it was life changing. I could have continued but I got enough in that 12 weeks to move onto AA and continue my journey with a sponsor. Most IOP’s actually encourage you go to AA meetings while attending their program.
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Glad you came here to share. You’re not alone. I’m sure you’re getting a lot of TS love that I’ve missed but just wanted to send my support. Every day is a new day. 
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That is a precious photo! Thanks for sharing, amiga. Happy Mama’s day to you.
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