Hey yall happy friday
Going to a baseball game tonight plus fireworks. I went last month and was overwhelmed by all the alcohol and advertising. I wonder if i will feel different with a few more weeks of sobriety under my belt…we shall see
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Day 97
Got less done today than i hoped to. Day isnt fully over though. Dreading going back to work.
All the other times i tried to stop using, I would get sober and look at all my toxic qualities and habits and get so exhausted id use again.
I am a very angry person! Always have been. My mom has a childhood story about me immediately identifying with the word “enraged.” Baseline anger is higher than average, and for sensible reasons. not dealing with it in any healthy way has changed the course of my and others life for the worse countless times.
I dont get urges to use as much as depression and dissociation that make me think, “might as well.” So maybe i am just on my phone all day instead.
Idk. 6 years is a long time to be feeling like this. I dont know if i can hope for a baseline where i wake up with energy and positivity and not already borderline su!c!dal.
Do i expect the next few months to just be hitting a wall?
How do you as an adult change habits that should have been changed years ago?
Thanks for listening and for being this space.
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Day 237 AF
Been an okay day. Last day of work tomorrow and then I’m on vacay. The wife and my oldest son are gonna go watch the Jurassic World movie. Gonna stay home and babysit my 3 year old. He’s been fussy all day. Gotta give the wifey a breather too.
I hope everyone is doing well. Stay strong and take care!
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I like reading this. I think you’re doing great. Keep it up!
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Checking in on day 364. Took the kids on their first roller coaster and log flume rides today. Tomorrow I am going to a wedding. Unavoidable, as it is in support of my wife (her side of the family). I know there will be booze. I have good reason to stay away from it. Many good reasons. I will try to check in here for moral support.
Congratulations @Ravikamor on two years! You’re an inspiration to me!
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Quick check in. 1.5 hours away from 29 days AF. Had a long drive today 7 hours 45 minutes starting vacation. Left the house this morning to some flash floods and we were able to make it through. Some scary and uncertain times through water (don’t ever drive through a flooded road. I learned that lesson today. A big part of my town flooded so prayers to all the families.
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Evening Check in
Day 116
I feel like 100% better now that I ate and hydrated myself lol its just a mild craving to use now (which I think is weather related). I work this weekend. Not particularly thrilled about that. I honestly dont feel like going in. But I don’t really have a choice nor do I have a good reason not to go. Today I got all my ingredients and supplies to make some delicious gluten free cupcakes and brownies for a kids birthday party on the 18th. I’m excited to be baking again. My hubbys coworker is having a bday party for his 2 kids. My hubby is doing magic tricks and I’m baking (not going tho). So that will be nice. And ya the weather is beautiful here. Now all I need is some self care and a good rest and all will be well lol
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Thank you!! 364 days!!! You are doing awesome 
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Hello all - Checking in @ day #42
God bless 
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Checking in Day 5 is complete. Nice easy weekend ahead. Feeling alright. Let’s keep it up! 
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Love your new profile pic.
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Isn’t it amazing how our addict can do that without us even realizing it. It’s great you noticed before too long and are willing to readjust the behavior. Really good stuff.
Congrats on your AF days.
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Awe thank u! I wanted something that really represented me 
u felt my old pic didn’t really suit me anymore lol
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That sounds like so much heaviness. I can remember being in a situation where I wasn’t happy not too long ago. It was soul crushing and it was overwhelming because I thought I would never be free. I saw no way out because I was looking too far in the future. When I looked at what I could do each day to make even the smallest move towards freedom from that situation it wasn’t as overwhelming. You can do that too, you can look at your situation one day at a time just like you do sobriety. What can to do today that can help you tomorrow?
I hope that you are safe.
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Congratulations @Ravikamor ! That’s a wonderful anniversary that you worked very hard for! Happy for you and your achievement!
Thanks for what you do in general support, plus the birthday thread, plus the zooms
And lots more, I’m sure! It all means so much and helps make and keep sober peeps! Hugs 
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Big hugs Oh dear, i am glad your all ok and i will pray for all the families in your city 
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Thank you.
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Checking in on day 4 again. My boyfriend came, could not tell him. What should I say? I remember one time he told me that 1 bottle for both of us should be enough for 1 evening. It has been ashaming for me, because he is a very kind and friendly guy who never discusse or had any fight with me. Don’t missunderstand, he is very tough at sport and in his job. But all what concerns me, he is caring and friendly and full of love. That’s one of my big reasons to come on the track. No clue what to say. I really don’t want to make him sad.
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