Day 311 checking in having a quiet nite tonight shower then chill out have a good day people 
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Iām hoping this isnāt too harsh, but whether or not you felt anything isnāt the point. You craved alcohol and then acted on that craving. Sure itās your sobriety and you can do with it as you please. But by not resetting your time youāve already given yourself permission to do it again. The āpromiseā to reset if it happens again is pretty standard alcoholic justification
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Back on day 3 back to binge watching Netflix in a lot of pain stupid pancreas 
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@Dazercat @Mno @maxwell @Butterflymoonwoman @anon74766472 @SassyBoomer
Thank you thank you! Yāall put a big ole smile on my face 
The support and stories of everyone here on TS has been such a crucial piece of my sobriety and I am so dang grateful for each and every one of you!
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Hey Kat here checking in at day 55 free of alcohol and benadryl and Day 360 off meth pills.
Day 3 of a 5-day stretch at work. It is funny at work how the rumors go round I get asked almost every day if it is true I used to be an RN (I work now as a PSW or nurseās aide). Of course I donāt say anything about addiction but I do fess up to having had a ābreakdown.āā¦well true it was a fucking spectacular breakdown involving IV narcotics and PTSD and compassion fatigue lol.
People are just curious why I want to work at a job that pays about half what I used to make. I say itās less stress (which it is). Lol.
Other than that I am starting to remember to surrender every day and to work my program every day or the disease will come back and destroy me. Loving meetings every day, I feel safe at meetings even on Zoom.
Much love to you all
Kat
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one day at a time.
Well done 
Congratulations, well done
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Day 209 nearly done. Can anyone advise me if the battle in my mind between wanting a drink, because I feel like Iām missing out, ever goes? Iām having to constantly remind myself that I have a new better life now, but itās just hard having that voice talking to me at times. I hope I make sense
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Checking in
Day 165
Today has been decent. 4th covid shot went well. Spent time playing Minecraft with my boy and did some cleaning. Just listened to an Aboriginal Elder (who I know from back home) speak on troubling events and how he handles them. And it was amazing to hear a different approach on how to handle such things. He basically said when he is approached with a troubling event, a conflict, or something traumatic, instead of reacting to the situation with emotionā¦ he sometimes doesnāt comment on it in the moment. He doesnāt really say much until he has prayed to Creator about it and asked for guidance. Then he can approach the situation with a clear and connected (to Creator) mind. He also said that healing is often not planned. Things happen unexpectedly and healing can come in many forms. It was interesting to listen how others handle situations. Something Iād like to strive for personally. Day has been better since I have slowed down. I really focused on doing things with purpose 
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Congrats on your 2 years sober Jess!!!
Woooohooooo, so stoked to be on this journey with you. Mah little sugah twin. 
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That voice will come and go thatās your addiction talkin wanting to drag you back nothing good comes from drinking we all have experienced it or we wouldnāt be on this app your not missing out thatās for sure
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Thank you sweet lady 
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270
Moved into my new room and everything is unpacked !! Now what ? Time to keep moving forward and do what I can to snap out of this sadness . I want success right now , and money , credit , a car , a house and so on !! I think about my literally wasted time and it sucks but Iām trying to be grateful. Iām trying to stay in today and give this thing some time . Going to do some writing and collect my thoughts in my journal. I might go skate when it cools down . Hope everyone is hanging in there and staying strong . God bless
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After rehab, I watched one YouTube video. Iāve been struggling to stop watching YouTube again for 2 years now. That one youtube video made the addictive thoughts much stronger.
You probably already had those thoughts. You didnāt feel anything this time. Maybe next time will be the same. Maybe you could even drink a whole glassā¦ just once of courseā¦ or maybe I can moderate.
Everyone whoās had a relapse knows these thoughts. Those who havenāt probably also in a way. We yearn for our next fix. The monster lies to us. It manipulates us. It makes us question ourselves.
The monster knows what itās doing. It entangles itās lies with truths. For example:
Relapses do often lead to a decrease in motivation. There have been many members here who had one relapse and were unable to regain control for a while. So itās a reasonable thought, right?
Not binding consequences to your āslip-upsā to avoid a lack of motivation seems rational. But our addict brain isnāt rational and will abuse that lack of consequence until youāre back in that dark hole of addiction.
But perhaps it does work out. You donāt lose motivation because of your reset. You see your numbers grow but you know deep inside those numbers are a false depiction of your sobriety because you know now that you were dishonest with yourself. You lose motivation because it is eating you up. It gets harder and harder to admit it since youāve been proudly sharing your progress with everyone here. People may look up to you. How could you hurt their trust by admitting that lie? And slowly we go down the dark hole again, with a twist of extra self-hate.
In short, be honest with yourself. Admit that it was indeed a relapse, like you did, and be amazed by the feedback and support youāre receiving. You messed up, but with all this support and understanding, you can go back to kicking addictionās ass. If you donāt feel motivated after a relapse, weāll make you 
All that aside, it takes a lot of courage coming out about having relapsed. You did good 
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Good Afternoon, Guys
Day 46
This week I havenāt had energy for much. I have just been working and going home be with my kids and visiting my grandma.
Still sober and drinking doesnāt really cross my mind.
I have a wedding to attend tomorrow that I really donāt want to be at but itās a friend of my S/O so I want to be supportive of him. Iām hoping itās really boring and that he wants to leave early 
.
I took this week to regroup and get back to my regular routine Monday.
I need the gym!!
Now for some shout outs.
@maxwell Glad to see youāre back at it. I am happy you didnāt go longer than 3 days. Wishing you strength. You now have a piece of knowledge you didnāt have before.
@SassyBoomer I hope that things go well with your scans. You are one strong lady.
@Leveller Congrats on day 4 keep going
@runner I hope you have been able to do something else rather than pick up. You can do it.
@EFountains Nice 10 days!!! congarts. Happy to hear you are feeling amazing.
@Juli1 Congrats to you as well on 7 days.
@Bry84 4 days is great. Happy that your sonās called gave you motivation. Keep at it
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Hey guys- 122 days FOUR MONTHS 
Iāve accomplished a lot these last few months and I feel really strong with my sobriety from alcohol.
I need to voice the other addict thoughts because they are consuming me and Iām hoping someone can point me in a good direction for some threads/link to help.
Now Iām sober and living without the fog of constantly being buzzed, Iām considering the other vices that have creeped in over the years. I have struggled with food for a long time, and I can really start to clearly see my binging relationship with eating when Iām stressed. This is a daily struggle, because we need to eat food, so itās in my life. I know I canāt moderate alcohol, so how do I moderate food? It consumes my thoughts, I struggle with impulse eating, and everyone at my workplace likes to āfeedā, itās like they encourage binge eating the same way they do with drinking. Itās super toxic.
Another one Iām struggling with, and itās only really crept out since my dog died last week, is my sex addiction.
Iāve suffered alot of loss over the years, my sister and parents. All scattered through the last decade. And I used sex to escape, and control how I was feeling. To seek a high within my lows.
And Iāve gotta say, this last week has really brought that to the surface for me. I havenāt participated in any super risky sexual behaviour in years. And now itās consuming my thoughts. My brain is trying to escape. I feel numb and sad and itās trying to get that high.
I just wanted to talk about it here, to get it out of my head.
Thanks for listening. Have a great day guys.
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Hey man, youve come a long way! You keep doing the next right thing. Congrats on the new living sitch. I understand the feeling of not being where you āshould beā in life. But you are doing a hella lot better than you were 270 days ago! Keep working your recovery one day at a time, practice gratitude, and you will see the other side of this sadness
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Thank you so much for reaching out and for your wordsā¦ I think Iām definitely not alone on being hard on myself and my progress . Iām trying to seriously keep things basic because that is what has keep me off the alcohol ā¦ definitely way better then 270 days ago !! Thank you . Hope your hanging in there and have a good day or night depending where your at!!
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Congrats on 4 months!! @Alycia keep growing in your sobriety. It sounds like you are identifying your addictive behavior. Thats the first step to real change. Keep at it!
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