Beautiful scripture!
1 Like
total mood 
@Butterflymoonwoman thank you so much for the support 
yes I need to be open minded about AA, same steps you’re right and I remember liking the ‘Promises’ which we don’t have in NA, lots of great role models here and in my Healthcare group of long-timers in AA. And it would be a secondary thing, maybe once a week or every couple kinda thing.
I know for damn sure I cannot control my drinking well once it starts and it leads me to want stimulant drugs. My sponsor told me from now on she wants me to visualize my DOC beside the alcoholic beverage whenever I picture alcohol. Very effective! I’m using those nasty rectangular meth pills.
It was actually hilarious at my first rehab we had to take turns reading from the Big Book except they said to pretend it was us. So a meth addict who was a bit of a class clown started reading and instead of Dr. Bob ‘Falling down the stairs drunk’ or something he said Dr Bob was coming down the stairs ‘Juuuust Tweakin’’ lol
3 Likes
Omg that’s hilarious haha u can actually replace some of the words in the Big Book to make it more relatable lol that’s so funny tho. Whatever it takes for us addicts to relate eh? I also really like that idea that ur sponsor gave u. I think for many people one thing leads to another. So no substance is safe 
2 Likes
Right!!! God is awesome
1 Like
Welcome back.
1 Like
Wow congrats on your 365 days without alcohol…thats a good chunk of back to back days. Very happy for you!!!
2 Likes
118 days 
The rain here is unrelenting. Just weeks and weeks of pouring rain. I can’t go out in nature (my happy place), I can’t start my days with a brisk walk by the water.
Really having a rough go of it. I know there are sunny, easier times to come. But it just feels really depressing and lonely without my lil dog pal.
Anyway, sorry to be a downer. Just coming on here when I can, because really I just want to drink/do something dumb to make the pain go away. I know it won’t really make it go away, but it’s normally my go to for when I’m feeling like this. Distract, numb the feelings.
Have a good one guys x
19 Likes
Big sisterly hug sweetie. 
2 Likes
Hi, I’m Denise and I’m a recovering addict.
Lots on my mind and I’m not ready to talk to my family about it yet so I’m sorry but you guys have to get it.
I got a call from the VA today. I have to go in Thursday for a cat scan of my chest. I told you guys the other day they found a nodule on a lung. The doctor told me not to worry, just watch it and rescan in 3-4 months. I guess my primary dr disagreed lol. I downloaded my report on the VA health page and it described the nodule as a 1.3 cm spiculated one. That means it is highly likely to be cancer. I made the decision that I would move into a VA home so my family won’t give up everything to take care of me and witness my decline. On the other hand it could be from infection like the doctor said. Either way, I’m clean and sober and can rationally make decisions. Needed to get these words out of my brain. Sorry guys. Asking for prayers, positive vibes, harmonious balance or whatever you can send me. Will keep you updated.
29 Likes
Praying for you.
1 Like
I am so glad u got this off ur chest. News like this is NEVER easy and it probably will take time to process. I’m glad that ur such a strong woman and thru everything right now, u are staying true to urself. I wish I had some miracle words to make everything better for u. But u will be in my thoughts and prayers everyday
2 Likes
Big love Denise, thinking of you
2 Likes
Checking in on Day 3. I feel physically well and rested. The mind still goes back to memories (or lack of memory) from last weekend so the anxiety is still there. But I want to be strong. I want to look at all the positive things in my life and work hard to keep them that way
14 Likes
@Lorelai its such an empty feeling not having a dog in the home. Our dog was so small but made such a big difference in our lives. I think we will adopt in the future. Our family has a lot of love to give, and the pounds here are overflowing and screaming for people to adopt a pup.
5 Likes
Hey, I’m sorry I never had a chance to respond to about sharing about your son. Thank you for sharing your story. It takes a lot to open up like that. Also I’m sorry about your eel. We’ve had so many animals and I cry so hard every time we lose them. Even my daughter’s gerbil… I was crying so hard and my daughter looked at me and said " Is it okay that I’m not as sad as you? Mom, it really is okay, she had a good life you really took care of her well"
3 Likes
Why do I love ur posts so much! The emojis just make me so happy 
hope ur day is wonderful!
3 Likes
Lots of positive vibes coming your way 
Evening Check in
Day 161
Day was good! But I’m noticing that I get antsy when I have nothing to do. This usually happens in the afternoon after I eat lunch. I’m busy alot in the morning with exercise and my recovery routine and my sons morning routine. But by the afternoon when things settle down, I start getting squirrely. I usually try to take my time cleaning or do a craft or something. My energy levels drop also in the afternoon. I almost feel like I NEED to be constantly productive in order to have a good day (which isn’t true). Idk. Anyway, things are good today. Thinking of alot of people on TS today going thru hard times. Hope everyone is having a good day/night
17 Likes
Day 1360.
Also 14 days without diet coke and other things I put on my list. Feeling better although the thought of a little treat is coming up now and then.
I am grateful to be sober.
17 Likes