Gm I am at 2 1/2 years and 7 days clean today. I am really upset about my sponsor. She hasn’t been taking my calls or replying to me, slowly decreasing contact since I started step 4. I don’t know what to do. Also, I was offered a position to sit at an HNI panel in a woman’s jail and spread the message of recovery and Narcotics Anonymous.I talked to the lady who offered it to me yesterday and she told me she would call me back and never did. I texted, no reply… I don’t know why these ppl w a lot of clean time are not being consistent. Anyway, I don’t know what I should do but I am going to first assert myself . Then go from there. I have a video visit w my boyfriend tomorrow… I am always nervous about them but they end up going good … yeah I hope it does . I am just going to tell myself it will go well and that I can do this! I get nervous and excited… well, I am also mad about my weight plateauing or slowly creeping . I think I just need to be grateful… also, I got passed the “who are you resentful towards and why?” Question on step 4 In the inventory… I wrote almost a whole notebook on that question but i was having a hard time getting those nasty resentments out that we’re keeping me stuck. Recovery is possible and worth it. Ttyl
Hanging in here. I have to sleep early because tomorrow I wake up at 4 AM for my side job and in the evening I go to work night shift.
I know working won’t help me beat this and I have to face my urges but hey, I know I ain’t going back, it is what it is.
Hope you guys are doing well.
Start of day 4. Good morning everyone. I have exposure therapy today for my phobia. It’s always a really draining day. I DO think it’s helping…. A little. But it’s hard.
Congrats on your 1 week Petri
Hey thanks. Don’t feel like I’m winning anything. Just happy to be living as a non addict. 
Congratulations on your 150 days Kelly.
That’s a great chunk of sobriety you got going there.
You’ve been around here enough to know about
H.A.L.T. Right?
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired.
Every once and awhile when I got a good chunk of sober time going I’d get depressed or weirded out or just get in a funk. It was a struggle. I figured I had one job. Just make it through the end of the day sober. That’s it. Because I know what that first drink does to me. It fucks me up for a really long time.
Reach out.
We got your back.
I’m so glad you didn’t give in either! Yes dinner ended up going really well. I’m so happy to wake up sober😊
Good luck today on ur therapy. That honestly sounds exhausting and emotionally draining.
I’m so sorry you are struggling. Sometimes we can’t fix those feelings. Sometimes we just have to feel them and remind ourselves that these feeling will pass. I’m the moment it can feel as though they are swallowing us up, but there is a light that will shine bright again for you soon.
Is there anyone you can call to talk to, or maybe have come over? If not, we are here. Please let me know how you are. I haven’t scrolled down to check if there’s more of your posts or others responses, but I will now. I just wanted to reach out. You’re not alone.
Good to see you, Chris Yes, balance is important.
Cheers, I know right?!
Actually was ok. Lovely weather and nice food.
Hope everyone else is well
Hey guys. Starting to checkin again. I will be free the few next week so will be checkin frequently.
I actually relapsed last week. 3 times. It was horrible. But now I am feeling much better and I have actually talked to someone about it.
It is day 3 today but now I will be focusing on the person I want to become rather than focusing on just counting days. I written some goals and set small habits that will help towards that goal. I feel confident but I also know that there will be difficult times ahead.
Have a nice day guys. Peace.
Thank you Flannery, have a good day too!!! 
Checking in day 125. Hope you all have a great monday!
Checking in Day 18
Just been relaxing around the house until work this evening. Been having a slight headache since yesterday that’s being annoying. Was thinking about how much better my anxiety has gotten since I quit alcohol. And I ran across this which was soooooo true for me. Everyone have a blessed sober day. Talk to you later❤️
Tomorrow is my 11 month milestone, I was feeling really excited about it if I’m honest, rang my mum where one of my brothers live my mum and dad altogether, and as my son and brother are going to watch a football match at the stadium tomorrow I explained its 11 months for me and il cook everyone’s favourite dinner and come over to just be told No, my mum doesnt want any company while they are at football.
Kind of making me think it’s not a big deal when I actually felt so happy and proud.
So I’m going to wait for my son for 5 hours to finish at football in my mums area by myself and thought I might as well go to a meeting up there and a long walk and coffee shop by myself.
It did cross my mind what is the point I might as well have a few glasses in the pub while i wait no one else cares (i know my son does) if i drink or not they still treat me like I’m not welcome unless they need something. Quite hurt my heart.
But I’m ok. I will find a way to celebrate like still cook the dinner for me and my son and find something to do as my mum doesnt want any company… maybe I’m being silly and sensitive or even childish that I wanted my mum to at least say that’s good I dno … for my mum she made such a big deal out of me needing to stop drinking but shows coldness and no feeling about me stopping.
She just pulled some face when I said 11 months that made me lose my courage and self worth and happiness how far iv come.
Welcome back 
Im sorry to hear about ur relapse but great idea on checking in everyday! Happy to see u posting
11 months is amazing! We are proud of you!
Ur 11 month milestone IS a big deal!!! I’m sorry that ur mom isn’t feeling up for company tho. I wonder why? Ur sobriety is a huge accomplishment. We know how hard it is to get clean and sober and u have put in a hell of a lot of work!!! I find that sometimes family or friends just don’t get it lol like they don’t understand how hard it is for us on a daily basis to battle those demons and work our recoveries. Maybe ur mom doesn’t understand? Idk. My husband too. He isn’t an “addict” like me and he doesn’t get how I work hard daily for what I have in my life today. He doesnt get that nagging addictive voice lol But we will all be cheering u on, supporting u on ur milestone. I hope u can find something special to do. I’m really very proud of you! And plz be proud of urself. We as humans want that recognition but at the end of the day we have no control over how other people respond. We can’t guarantee that we will get the response we want from others but we can guarantee to get that from ourselves. Hugs lady!
flowers for u on ur 11 months of amazing sobriety!!!
I don’t think your being silly or childish. You feel hurt and you feel let down . I can relate to the situation and with some of my family it’s the same . Sometimes it’s like some people don’t know how much work we really put into staying sober . Be proud !! Don’t let anybody take your joy away about your 11 months. We have our own personal victories sometimes and accomplishments and you get to rest your head tonight knowing your doing everything for your recovery and your succeeding. Your living life and bettering yourself . Maybe going to the meeting will help and you can be around people who understand. You can still have a good day and celebrate and cook . I really do understand how your feeling and hope your day gets better . 11 months is major ! It’s something to be very proud of .