Day 1 and hating myself for being trap in a dammed cycle
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But youāre here @Bomdhil and thatās AWESOME!!! Iām proud of you, we all start at day 1 my friend, good to see you checking in 
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But you are here and on day 1! Thats freaking awesome! 
im so glad you chose to come here today.
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Iām just a day behind you both. Letās do this!
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Awesome man. I need to do something like this soon. Hope you have a bad ass time.
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@Bomdhil The fact that you are here is evidence that you are on the right track. Desire to get clean and realization that you have an issue is the biggest step in my opinion. Without that you wouldnāt make one day much less 30-60-100ā¦ā¦ā¦ if I may suggest something that helped me, keep a journal. Write down how you feel about alcohol (or whatever you drug or choice is) and your relationship with it at this point. Write down any feelings, hurt, anger, shame, burning desireā¦ā¦ I would write down something almost daily and then throughout my healing process would go back and read it. Seemed to help keep those feelings fresh and at the forefront of my mind. Previous attempts at sobriety I did not do this and eventually I would forget how much that first few days stung. Youāve got this. We are all here rooting for you. God bless.
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34 days sober and feeling great. Been running a ton and have greatly improved my mile time and endurance in general. I absolutely hate running, so Iāve made it my mission to become a runner. Punish myself in a sense I guess. Haha. Hope yāall are doing well too. God bless you all.
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I think I missed it too! 
Thanks man!! I hope youāve been doing well! I read all your posts I just have been super busy so havenāt had time to post much other than the daily check in.
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@Twizzlers I, too, am glad you shared how youāre feeling. Nothing to be embarrassed about at allā¦.actually quite the opposite in my opinion. You got through those feelings without numbing out with booze. And thatās huge! Proud of you and glad youāre feeling better!
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90 days AF
Please celebrate me 
?
I have my gift, itās super nice and cozyā¦
I had a very positive appointment at my doctor with some good ideas to tryout against my fatigue, a allround blood test again and very streight compliments to my fitness level and current weight. What else is needed?
Anyway I am so fucking sad today!
My thoughts are hauntingā¦
I feel fat.
I feel not loveable.
Everything is so loud.
I want silence.
I donāt want to eat.
I have my 90 minute live Yoga class later.
Will try to find some stillness in meditation, supported by my new pillow case and mask. Itās sooo luxurious.
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@Bomdhil I understand being in that vicious cycle and beating yourself up over it. But youāre here, being accountable and getting support! First step. I know itās hard to let go of the self hatred and shame of it all ā¦I still deal with this too. It really does get easier to start forgiving yourself little by little over time. Be easy on yourself and hang in there!!
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@Juli1 90 days is AWESOME!! Huge congratulations to you!!
I completely understand feeling like everything is so loud because Iāve actually been feeling like that too for a few days. I couldnāt have put that into words any better! Even though youāre feeling bad about yourself, try to remember that you have a lot to be proud of too! You are strong for being in this fight for your life, youāre focused and using some great tools to aid you in staying sober. And all of that makes you a badass!
ANDā¦.Iām super jealous of that mask and pillow case!
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Checking in for day 24. Hope everyone has a great day!
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@SoberWalker Oh wow those buildings !! I love history and old buildings absolutely beautifull 
Are you allowed in the buildings ?
What a lovely place to visit, and the clown wagon looks cozy, the clown does remind me of āITā too hehehe.
@KrispyMac Thank you so much for your kind and encouraging words. I am glad i posted how i felt, it was very overwhelming at the time and im so glad taking a reatfull day today i am feeling more like myself again.
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@Juli1 Im sorry to hear your feeling sad today 90 days is amazing though congratulations and big well done to your for getting to milestone.
Maybe try and eat something, even something small ? You do cook amazing dishes iv seen on the food thread .
Tonight after your live yoga i hope this will help you feel more like yourself. And your pillow and eye mask are lovely i imagine wearing it with some calm music in the background.
I understand wanting quite and feeling everything is too loud, when i get this its like a sensory overload like too much going on around me from the external environment. I hope this passes quickly for you. If not im here for you 
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Day 19 AF
Day 14 no pills
All is good, last day of gastritis medication. I sometimes still have a funny feeling in my belly but maybe only because Iām hyper aware of the area? No pain or heartburn any more Iāll stick to my healthier diet, it feels too good to stop it already.
There are some things changing in my mindset about myself and I love it. I finally accept my body, I even liked what I saw in the mirror when trying on new clothes last weekend 
I think I do something right, I wasnāt able to accept me for ages.
I admitted that Iām an alcoholic, I will always be one. I wonāt ever be able to go back to a ānormal drinking behaviorā. I have trauma from the past, it made me who I am. Itās bad and good at the same time.
It is what it is.
I hope youāre having a great sober day, Iām grateful for this place and you guys 
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Congratulations on your 90 days Juli.
You.
Are.
Amazing. 
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Congrats Trav. 30 days is amazing! You made it through the hard part. Keep it up man!
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Checking in day 177 af. About to take my son to school and chill for a few hours before work. Got in a basketball league and had a game last night. Feeling great about that! Hope you all have a good one, thanks for being here!
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Morning Check In
Day 249
Morning TS fam! Todays been good so far!! My boy is at school. I had an amazing lower body workout today. Really focused on the quality of every exercise and not so much on how many reps i can do lol
Just getting ready now to head out to run some errands. Then have a zoom team mtg for a couple hours. Then the wifi technician guy is stopping by to fix our modem issue. Then waiting for a delivery lol Cleaning of course. And then relaxation 
Busy day lol But im grateful and connected today!
Hope everyone has an addiction free day!
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