Day 47 and it’s a day alone in our Airbnb. I love my husband and even being around strangers. I’m an extrovert but I can’t even REMEMBER the last time I had a whole day to myself at home. MAN did I need this.
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Two weeks AF.
It feels like a long time, but it’s a blip. I need to keep what that felt like in memory though, so I don’t find my way back there. Don’t allow time to distort the memory.
I want to live deliberately (h/t Henry Thoreau), but whenever I choose to have “just one,” I am letting alcohol take over and control me. As long as I maintain the power of that initial choice and don’t pick up the first drink, I am good.
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Three more days and ill have 60 days booze and soda free!! How is everyones progress??
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Day 2 . All ok 
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Thank you 
I’m home now. I’ll get some food, shower and go to bed right away.
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Made it to a whole week!! I can do this.
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Thank you
Thanks so much
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I had gastritis and drinked meds for almost 3-4 years. What helped me was less than half lemon squeezed in warm water on empty stomach. I combined it with intermitted fasting, skipping breakfast. Lemon water does wonders and fasted state helps with healing scars. I remember my doctor said, it’s like the more wood we throw into fire, the more fire we get. Many people says they can’t skip breakfast, but I did that instead of bleeding pain after eating. Also sugars, smoking, drinking alcohol always worsen gastritis. Oh and fermented food is also good for that, but it was not so noticeable for me.
Congrats on 10!
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I tried intermitted fasting and it doesn’t work well with my job. I leave the house at 6am and return home at 6pm. I ended up eating too little what made me crave tons of food later.
Next week I can stop my medication and will try the lemon water And I have to stick to a more healthy diet. I have all the knowledge but I’m lazy 
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Oh I’m so sorry! I feel like I can relate. Lack of sleep always triggers me and then of course there’s also hormones depending on my cycle I don’t know if that’s related for you at all but all I can say is I’m thinking about you and I know this will pass. I wish I had a good book recommendation but I don’t .I often just try guided meditations and if it’s due to lack of sleep I try to take a moment even if it’s just to be on the couch and doze off for 5 minutes if I have the time.
I also do use supplements sometimes just like adaptogen drinks etc that I do find helpful for stress and anxiety… But I know it just sucks to be in a place where you are right now and I’m sending you a big hug I know you’ll get through this and we’re here for you 
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It’s just good to take note of your triggers and be aware of them for next time. Also so important that you have been honest with yourself and with us so thanks for that you can do this!
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Checking in
Day 239
Im not sure how im feeling right now. I feel nothing to be honest. Im feeling very “flat”. Today overall has been a good day tho. Nothing bad happened. I am feeling very tired tho. Homecare issues for october were solved. So my anxiety and worry is gone now over that. I did some basic cleaning. My son had an at home appt with his speech therapist this morning and that went well. I really have nothing to complain about. I miss the gym and i miss my routine. I cant seem to get my butt up for 515am to workout. Its just not happening lol so my only option is to wait until oct 17 when my son goes back to school. That way I can work out at a better hour.
There was one scary situation that happened to one of my friends back home. I just heard about it and it just hit me really hard. She was on the bus and a man overdosed. She is also a recovery addict and when she went up to him at the back of the bus she swore he died just by what she saw (which I wont get into detail). She got off the bus started running to other buses nearby trying to find someone with a Naloxone kit. Noone had one. The bus driver wasnt even doing anything to help or calling for an ambulance. There was only 1 other woman who was trying to help. My friend was about 45 sec off that bus and when she went back on to see how he was, he all of a sudden sat up and started screaming like a child. She was so shook up. Her and the other woman were helping him. But this situation (even tho I wasnt there to experience this) really shook me up also. It first of all bothers me immensely to see or hear of other people hurting so badly. I really take on the pain of others and thats something I have to learn to seperate myself from. It also brought me back to my times of overdosing and it really reinforced my recovery today. Just the seriousness of addiction. Sometimes I think people forget how serious it is… I know I have in the past. All of my years in addiction, thru being a youth, teenager, young adult, and adult, i thought i literally had 9 lives lol bcuz of what Ive been thru and what Ive put my body thru I thot i was damn near invincible. I always thought that Id have another chance of recovery in me, that not a single drug could take me out. Its sooo important to realize that we are never guarenteed another recovery. It literally takes once to end everything. That 1 relapse could literally be ur last relapse… with no chance at recovery.
I was a chronic relapser… so often that I decorated a christmas tree many years ago with white newcomer keytags from my NA meetings. Then I laughed about it and made jokes cuz I thought it was funny. How wrong I was to make light of this 
Relapsing is very common in recovery but it doesnt have to be. In fact, in my opinion and from personal experience, relapsing in recovery can be even more dangerous bcuz our bodies go thru sooo much time without any substance in it, and then we relapse and end up giving our bodies way too much. Thats exactly how one of my overdoses ended up happening. Im scared for people. I guess i wanted to share this bcuz i care for u all and i wanted to really emphasize that relapsing doesn’t have to happen in recovery. To emphasize how truly serious addiction/alcoholism is. We risk our lives every single time we use or drink. Wether from overdosing or drinking n driving or passing out in the cold or whatever situations we put ourselves in. Its scary. Just really hoping that we all stay on this path of recovery. We all deserve a happy, joyous, and free life 
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That sounds like a scary and sad situation your friends was in. I also feel others people’s emotions very deeply as well. I’m sorry you feel off because of this. It sounds like it also really does put things in perspective. We have to keep fighting
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Day 40!
I feel like this should be a milestone too LoL. From 30-60 is a long jump. Anyway, I haven’t been keeping track too much lately as the days are getting easier with regards to craving alcohol. In fact, we had a Thanksgiving get together and almost everyone was drinking and I didn’t get the slightest urge…well, maybe for 1/2 a second. Honestly, that was it. Looking at the alcohol actually made my stomach turn a bit.
Emotionally I’m still up and down and I do seem to be experiencing more sadness. When I drank, I honestly felt more annoyed and angered by certain things that now leave me feeling thoughtful and somewhat meloncholy. I’m grateful though that I feel proud of myself for getting more in touch with my feelings and understanding even more some of the reasons I turned to alcohol. Right now I’m tired. I want to lay on the couch and veg out… But I must get ready to teach a class. Just one more for today, I can get through it.
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Holy crap!! Has it seriously been 40 days! Time is flying girl! Im so proud of you! I definitly sense the change and hear a more positive tone in ur posts. Things seem to be getting better for u! Im excited 
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Congrats on 40, I agree 30-60 is a big jump.
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Day 73. I haven’t checked in in a while but I’m doing well. Back in therapy and doing Recovery Dharma. I have stuck to my “One more time. Try one more time.” I’m really trying and I can tell the difference. Stay well everyone!
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Nice pic menno! I’ll be in buena vista day after tomorrow!
Bye for now…
Checking in. 54 days.
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