I’ve had this same struggle with my kids a few times…sorry your son is struggling right now, and your daughter doesn’t understand why he gets special help.
Not sure this is relevant to you, but it helped my kids understand why sometimes one will need more or different help than the other.
https://www.upworthy.com/teaching-fairness
Sending you calm and peaceful energy. I hope you can sit and enjoy some tea and read a little or catch up on a show or something you do to relax. You deserve it 
@Misokatsu This is exactly what i needed to hear thank you. Your so right its being smarter than me and i cant have that !! Thank you for pointing this out because it means i have now looked at that addict voice and my own as separate voices again i think they were joining teams for a minute !!
Your doing really well and it must be hard for you with the kids as it is for all parents im not singling you out here just want to say your doing do well as a parent and it is a tough job. I find my parents were different with my brothers and the sisters girls/boys i guess because each child does need different things and different punishments/tactics work better for others than not.
Kids dont understand thid until they are older but your doing well by helping when his sttruggling at school and dont make yourself feel bad for that or for having time for yourself 
1240
Coffee. Really enjoyed my extra hour in bed due to daylight saving time ending here. One more early shift. Three weeks off after! Let’s do this. Clean and sober.
Had some other vivid dreams, involving cycling and bball this time. And involving interaction and groups of people. Me looking for a place in groups somehow. I always used to dream about myself and myself alone. I feel this is progress. One dream at a time.
Have as good a day as you all can friends. Make it sober and clean. It’s why we’re here. Love from Amsterdam.
Wow this looks amazing i would love to see this in real life !! Thank you for the photos iv not seen here before.
Congratulations on your 2 days and for getting out and doing some fun stuff with the family 
@Alisa I will not drink, but it did feel like yesterday my addict voice and my own were teaming up, i have re separated them again. Im so glad to be able to come here and hear from others who get it. Thank you
#Day 1502 
Sunday, my first and last day of my weekend 
Worked a lot, almost 43 houres this week.
And today I’m going to play drum all day with the band I play in, so no rest for me today as well.
But I manage. Couldn’t have done that while I was still drinking, that’s for sure!
I have so much more energy now I’m sober!
But now I’m in chill mode together with my furry friend who lays behind me in the couch.
Enyoing the calm morning with cat and coffee (and clear mind!) is one of the benefits of sober living for me 
Happy sunday for all of you TS people! It’s good there is a place like this.
Day #68
Good Morning everyone I hope everyone is well. I managed to enjoy an extra hour in bed today due to GMT changing back from BST/DST. I’m feeling refreshed and ready for the day ahead.
I had a fantastic day yesterday, firstly at Parkrun, and then at the Rugby League World Cup. The urge to drink wasn’t as prominent yesterday (compared to when I attended a game two weeks back), so I just stuck with a few cups of tea. It was fairly chilly, so it was great to just be able to sit and keep myself warm with a nice drink. Others around me were drinking, but I was ok with that; I had my tea & that was enough for me.
Something that I’ve learnt, and something I’ve had to distinguish in the last two months is the voice in my head that tries to enable or justify wanting and/or needing alcohol. We all have “off” days, and I’ve had a few recently where all I’ve wanted to do is reach for a drink or drown my sorrows into the bottom of a glass, but I’ve stopped myself. I’ve reminded myself of the damage that alcohol & the addiction I had caused me and those around me, and that taking that path is nothing but a slippery slope. Once I begin, I wouldn’t be able to stop, and I mustn’t let myself get to that point.
Within the last two months, the urges to drink aren’t as prominent for me, especially when I’m in social settings or around others who are consuming alcohol. It’s taken time but going into potentially problematic situations with the mindset of: “You don’t need alcohol to have a good time. Don’t feel jealous that others are drinking; you aren’t disadvantaged, Andrew” seems to have really helped me. Of course, it is a journey, and it’s a reassuring and necessary process to remind myself that it is simply one day at a time, but every morning that I wake up now, I am promising myself that today isn’t going to be the day where I relapse. Hopefully, I never have to relapse moving forward.
Have a good day everybody. Whatever your plans may be, I hope you have a fantastic day. ODAAT.
Doing something for yourself is good for your health as well! I know the feeling of “only” being a mom ore a partner to my hubby but not being me for me. If you understand what I mean.
So please take that “me time” 
7 months today 
It’s been a good Sunday. I had a good workout and walk this morning, worked on my blanket and almost finished. Only one more night I think and it will be ready to gift 
spent some time chilling with the family.
Im approaching the mark of the year I relapsed last year after 6 months sobriety. I got to mid November and decided I would enjoy a drink at the Christmas party. And so before I had a drink at the Christmas party I decided I’d have a drink, just a treat, before the Christmas party in December. By the time I got to the Christmas party I was having a few drinks a week. After Christmas we were drinking nearly every day again. I was keeping it in order, not getting smashed, not downing bottles of wine and being cripplingly hung over, but eventually I was bringing a wine home, I was over eating, prioritising alcohol over food. And I was feeling shit. Depression was creeping in, my fitness goals were slipping again.
I stopped seven months ago after realising my one or two at Christmas was bullshit. I slipped so hard back into it, and it all started with one.
I don’t want to moderate. I want to live. I’m on alert this holiday season, I feel strong because I know my triggers and I’m done with the idea alcohol has a purpose for me anymore.
Thanks for being here for me guys.
Good morning from a sunny NE England.
Where did my extra hour go? 
.
Its a slow start today im still in first gear, its beautiful out there. The last day of my holidays and im going to spend it sat with my eldest dog Fern as she will be going to sleep for good tomorrow.
I am so lucky to have had her in my life for all these years. So its a sad time at the moment but one that we will get through.
@Alycia 7 months is great going 
Oh, I hope you two enjoy your day together. 
NE England too, Durham to be exact, small world 
hope you have a lovely day with Fern, bless her
Hi all,
Didn’t check in yesterday been really busy.
On the way to day 5 sober.
Been visiting my parents wich helps alot now, I slowly start to understand the things Ive been missing for last years.
I have to admit didn’t think I will make it this far but here I am.
Hope everyone is ok.
Day 29
I fell asleep on my couch yesterday and today I feel awful 
my back kills me.
Im laying on my hot water bottle and already got some magnesium to loosen those tight muscles and something for the pain. Being 42 requires regular movement or you’ll end up like me, feeling like crap.
From time to time I’ll try to do some stretching.
Oof 
BUT still better than being hungover 
Have a beautiful sober day friends 
Congratulations on your 7 months 
Im struggling with thoughts of having a drink at xmas. And even now if im honest.
I m finding myself constantly thinking about how i can make the reaction of others if i did to not be so bad !! Its stupid the way im thinking. I know it but i cant stop it.
Part of me needs to remind myself im not sober for them im sober for me and what fun really will have. Anyway just had to get that out its getting easier to dismiss this thoughts when i separate the voices to my addict and to my non addict voice as sometimes lately its seems they have teamed up.
Im so proud of you we can both get through xmas sober im here for you.
Are you knitting a blanket? Iv always wanted to make a patchwork quilt.
Oh dear, Im sorry to hear that. Im pleased your sober now though 
Im thinking of you during this difficult time
Im sorry you have to go through this i hope today will bring you comfort and love.
Im here for you if you need me
Sounds like you need to concentrate on getting through the Every day right now. Sober. I know sober is what you want to be but you have your junkie talking. My suggestion is to write down all the reasons why you want to be sober and write down the reasons that you would not want to be. Think about your accomplishments sober think about your swimming and how good that makes you feel. Think about how poorly you would feel if you started drinking. It all does have to do with you and how you will feel about yourself. I like how you have the two parts talking to each other and with the sober part winning out over the addicted part.
Sometimes I think it’s good to do something like put a bracelet on, even a hair rubber band, something tangible to remind you that you’re sober for a reason and when your thoughts start going the other way pop the band or just have that memory that that’s what that is for. You might even go out and buy a special bracelet for yourself. Your sober bracelet. Or necklace. And keep it with you in on you. When your thoughts go the other way touch it. It’s something tangible to get you away from those thoughts. I’m glad you’re talking about it @Twizzlers
Hugs xoxo
I really like this idea of the bracelet, how im thinking definitely is like a split road il either go one way or the other and i know i want to be on the sober road.
I do need to take each day at the moment and also go to some meetings that always helps.
I have a swim booked for 4pm which will help me sleep tonight and il cook dinner before i go and heat it up when im back from swimming.
But the week moving forward i may hit 7 meetings in 7 days. I know right now i will not drink and its just thoughts but this is how relapses start and your on point thats its all about how we feel.
Im going to go for a walk then make some breakfast.
I have alot of bracelets i havent worn i may go through them and put one on.
Thank you
