@Powerfulmikelamica Great to hear that! 
@KarenKW I understand it is very overwhelming at the moment. Could you go outside for a bit? Do you have a garden or balcony you can get some fresh air on?
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Counting all over again!!! Relapse #7
Not going to beat myself up on this one 
though. I talked to my addiction medicine therapist. She helped me clarify with the situation i was in at that moment. I was in a high triggering moment at that time, but not an excuse. With me calling her and being aware of what i did and understand what i did and by being honest this is and was the first step. Now i have to talk about this in all my recovery meetings and my live NA meeting this week.
Today is day 2!!
Here i go again!!!
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My 1st time posting on here. I’ve been just reading threads for the better part of 6 days. Im currently getting ready for bed to wake up to the start of my day 4. I found an AA meeting close to me tomorrow night so hopefully I just go and don’t let the anxiety get to me.
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welcome to the community, you’re in great company here. I’m proud of you for starting this process of getting sober
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Paaahahaha. Well I’m Super glad you had fun. I used to go to the par 3 with my boyfriend and I’d get bored after about 6 holes which was fine cause there was a pond. The pond had ducks. Id always buy a muffin at the shop before we got going and once we hit the ducks my whole goal was to get them to follow me to hole 18 
see. Having fun is what really matters. Also I just used his clubs and choked up. I could get it on the green in one and then it took 25 puts to get it in the hole
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Good job on 4 days! I hope the meeting feels comfy for you and you find it helpful
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Fantastic to see you! I hope you are doing well!
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These are outstanding! I love the 80s vaporwave vibe of the second one. Really nicely done!
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thank you!
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Hello TS fam. Checking in on day 507. I am sore from a 25 mile bike ride yesterday. Took the kids trick or treating tonight. Now I am trying to stay away from the deluge of candy flowing in and out of and around the house. Hope everyone is having a good start to the week.
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Hey! Welcome. You made a great decision to get sober and AA really helped me. You might have to try a few to find your fit, but you would be amazed with the level of quality in the rooms. Just amazing people. I’ve really enjoyed my sobriety and hanging with other sober peeps is key.
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Checking in day 113 AF. Managed to stay sober even when the guests at my Halloween party did jello shots 
Hope everyone had a happy and safe Halloween if you celebrated! 
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Thanks for taking the time to reply Dana 
I think it was on here ages ago (maybe even from u) where I read that relapses happen before they do, and starting to think about that got me noticing those often unnoticed causes more than usual. Especially sleep (both the right time and amount) and meditation for me. I think it’s their ability to slow down the overthinking brain to think clearly. As for groups, I did make a list and look into groups of interest, and it’s clear when I do (as with kickboxing) I can quickly connect with the people. But there are some more I’ll likely join soon too and gladly let yous know how they go… Actually the fact that my workplace is customer service orientated has opened me up a lot too, and I’d recommend it to anyone who’s problems make them want to retract. We were born to blossom! 
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tonight will be day 243 of no self harm TW for mentions of suicide, and blood in one of my art works at the end
today has been pretty rough. I think it’s probably because Halloween is the day that I found out one of my best friends had killed himself 5 years ago. he died on the 28th but I didn’t find out until I was out trick or treating with my friends and asked where he was. just a lot of chaotic energy. I’m just really irritated at everything and specifically myself. I’ve been drawing so much and I was loving it now it’s getting really hard to enjoy it because I’m so critical of every little thing. I used to draw a little bit and I always ran into that problem but usually not to this extent. I used to make these really trippy/slash creepy edits of a ton of different photos compiled together. here is a few
I’ve been wanting to make more of them since I got the iPad but I’m still learning the program. so I’ve been watching the tutorials that I’ve been mentioning. today I made this. strictly by following exactly what was said in the tutorial.
a little while ago I started another tutorial that was supposed to be an astronaut in space. I decided I wasn’t going to use the generic space images she had and I was going to make it creepy. I planned to follow everything exactly as she said other than the images. then I realized the color scheme she was using didn’t exactly line up with mine so I started using my own colors. and then i ended up just doing whatever I wanted and completely my own art other than following her directions on how to draw the shape of the astronaut. I know this is a very Niche art style and I’m not sure if anybody will like it but personally I love it. the image in the background and the woman in the suit are photos that I edited a little bit. the moon is a stamp, and the rest are hand drawn and effects that I’ve added with the program.
it always feels so therapeutic to make these kind of things. it gets so much chaotic energy out of my system and it helps me to visualize a lot of what I’m feeling because I have a really hard time saying how I feel or knowing how I feel. it’s really not everybody’s cup of tea but when I make this style of art, I don’t even feel like I need anybody’s approval because I just love it.
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I absolutely love these!! You’re an amazing artist!! 
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thank you:heart:
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I hope everyone had a good Halloween .
I’ve been up coming up on 21 hours. I really wanted to see my day roll over but it won’t happen for another 2 hours. Don’t think i can make it 
Have a good night y’all. And remember, you’re deserving of love and happiness 
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216 days 
All is well here. I’m sleeping atm so feeling a bit better than I have been. Still no word on my new work start date so I’m a bit stuck in limbo. My food binges have been less this last week.
Just trying to do my best and not be too hard on myself
Looking forward to the weekend already, haha.
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