I’m still alive folks still suffering…Setting some goals again and going to try get back up and on track 
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Maybe tell your police department when he’s released you’d like to see them patrolling your neighborhood and why.
I wonder if you can get like a direct/immediate line to them or something.
I’m just thinking out loud. I think a definite police presence in the area though would help ease the stress a little.
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@DLS since he is incarcerated on my cdv charge they are supposed to notify me when he is released. That is a great idea and I will most likely do that. When he was arrested the last time, I could not sleep. Not until I pulled the top half of my mattress to the floor away from the windows onto the floor. And this is knowing he was in jail. I don’t know how I will truly feel when that day comes, but I can imagine it will be worse.
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With men like this, it’s just a peice of paper if when they violate it nothing is done by you 
as soon as you report any violation it becomes serious I know this from past experience.
Your doing right by having that document get I know it’s not easy going through all this but it is worth it.
I would take his stuff out your house is not your problem anymore.
There’s only one way to deal with this type of person and that’s be serious hard and firm.
You say you have kept a log but shouldn’t you be reporting this straight away ? It’s giving him the impression its okay and not serious.
Your safety is important, if you haven’t reported all the times he violated it already and are prepared to let him come and get his stuff then this sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I’m saying this from a caring place and from experience.
Please don’t think I’m having a go at you I’m not, I know when your the person in this situation its not easy to see it how it is.
I want you to be safe and okay 
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When my son was born his dad was in prison sending threats he is going to take him and too get his stuff that is already got rid of etc… we got a restraining order in the middle of the night and he was arrested at the gate of the prison to be handed the restraining order and for the threats he made.
This still didn’t stop him harassing me and trying to take my son this was 20 Years ago and it’s because when he was in prison I let him get away with the bullying and scaring me still. These type of people need straight firm boundaries with no lines in-between
I know your scared I know what it feels like I’m sorry your going through all this
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@Twizzlers yes I agree with you I should have pressed charges on the violations. But I didn’t. I honestly just want his stuff out of my house so he has no reason to be here. By the order, he is supposed to give me a 48 hour notice before coming to get his things. Do I think he will abide by that, no. I live within walking distance of the jail. Once he is released my plan is to go to the magistrate office and ask if I can at least move the stuff to a storage unit that I will pay for. They have denied that request recently. Maybe once he’s released they will change their mind. I will pay for the unit for 30 days and have a third party give him the keys. This is my only plan. Because I’m stuck by the laws of eviction in my state. It’s a dammed if u do and dammed if u don’t kind of feeling. If I move his property without consent, I could be legally charged. I promise this to myself….after all of this I WILL NEVER have someone live with me again unless I’m married. Then I have rights to marital property. But it’s pretty shitty I have to hold on to and protect the belongings of someone who has assaulted me and locked up. He admitted under oath at the protection hearing he was sorry and that he did it. I don’t understand why I can’t use a storage unit without legal consent.
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@Twizzlers i don’t think you know just how much your response hit home. It’s so hard talking about this to anyone. No one understands unless u have been through it.
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Lots of hugs
When they tell you he is being released is it possible to get the police to be there to do the handover of his stuff or someone else but not you.
It’s so difficult for you I’m sorry to hear your going through this.
Maybe reporting the violations will help with making sure he can get his stuff another way.
It’s so difficult and I under stand you don’t want to get him in more trouble or even feel your provoking him when your already scared.
Just a thought have you maybe tried to get some he advice for yourself from domestic violence charity ?
They can be so helpful and understand be the law around all this stuff to.
I’m in the UK so it’s probably but different for you.
I’m here for you, feel free to messages me anytime okay for support 
It’s 8am here so I’m just going to go to the super market as it’s already raining and won’t get better but I’m always on here if you need a chat.
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Also, @Luna2022 have a police escort for him when the designated time is for him to get his things. Don’t let him just drop by unannounced. Idk if it’s possible to put his things in one area, preferably not inside your home; maybe garage or something. I would have friends there also so you’re supported.
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Have a good day Menno, it looks like the birds were all posing for you xoxo
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I can’t top Donna’s advice. I would ask for police to be present when he get out to get his stuff. You seem to be thinking this through very thoughtfully. I absolutely hate this for you. I can’t imagine the fear, and so little you have control over. I’m praying for you.
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#Day 1564 
Last days of a sober 2022. I think it was a year I gladly leave, despide it has it good sides as well.
The best day of 2022 was our marriage after being more then 25 years of being together.
This was the wedding bouquet. When I think of 2022 it’s not all sunshine and roses. Being sober doesn’t make my life perfect. But isn’t that what life is? Making the best of it despite all what comes my way. Trying to focus on the good and the things I can control. Like me not drinking
Focus on the good. Focus on the good things that happened in 2022 instead of the bad.
It helps me!
But 2023 may start right now for me!
Today? Walk and work.
Have a good sober/clean day all of you and remember: do you have a hard day? Venting helps and there is always someone awake to respond.
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Thank you so much for reminder and this nice colorful picture Claudia 
It’s an inspiration to make a list of the good! 
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That sounds bonkers that you can’t move the stuff! Does that mean you can’t change the locks?
Is there anywhere you could go for a few weeks around the time he gets out? Either friends and family, or are there any domestic violence organisations locally that could advise you? And yes agree with @Twizzlers that you should report the no contact violations so there is a record of them.
Maybe you have already considered those things. I hope so. It sounds so frightening and I am sorry to see you are going through this 
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236, checking in. have had better days. still going, odaat.
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Day 247. Im so burnt out from work. 2 serving jobs, non stop from 8 am to 11 pm. Back at again in about 6 hours. At least tomorrow is my last double. No time to drink at least. No time for anything. Good night.
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Dear Luna,
I just read around your posts and I am not able to find the right words to you. I think the best recommendations are already given by some nice people round here.
Keep your head up girl and keep that big red line hardly signed with all that is possible…!!!
Sending you lots of strength!
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O M G !! Words cant tell how I feel now! I can almost not belive it, one year, 12 months, 52 weeks, 365 days! A year ago I could never imagine where I am now, I could never imagine my self being sober like this. Its just: wow!!
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Congratulations 
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