Hey Mark! How are you? Thank you for checking in on me. I REALLY appreciate that. Ive been doing okay overall. Today hasnt been the greatest tho. Had some ups n downs recently but i feel like im handling life alright.
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Congratulations on ur 2 months!! Im so proud of you! 
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So glad u got some prayer and meditation in today. I bet that felt really good to do that 
im glad ur getting some exercise too even tho its abit hard right now. Stamina hopefully will come back to u quickly and u can hike across the city yet again. Hugs friend
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Hi butterflymoonwoman. Im doing ok. Just took some vitamin b12ā¦supposed to be goodā¦if alcohol was abused. The finishline is the pillow tonightš
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Yeah it is. 
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Looking back over this thread for the last month. It has been a journey. Tomorrow morning I will wake up to day 30. I have come to so appreciate this group of beautiful people.
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Congrats on 60 days ! Thatās awesome!
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Evening Check In
Day 388
Been an average day. My son was home from school for an appt. Appt went really well. Got home and started feeling really just down and fatigued. Caught myself doing some comparing (comparing myself to a friend of mine). Wont go into much detail about that but at the end of the day its my issue not hers. I dont treat her any differently and do respond back when she messages. Its just a very different friendship as it is. But the green eyed monster that reared its ugly head today, probably brought me down.
Recovery wiseā¦ things are good. I rarely get urges to use anymore but im wondering if i need more support. Im having to stay on my toes more bcuz that little annoying voice in my head is saying, āwow ur over a year clean, maybe u can distance urself from ur supports. Maybe u dont have to bother opening up anymore on TS. Maybe you dont need anyoneā. And honestly that scares me! So i do the opposite. Bcuz decades ago in the 12 step rooms, people always told me that when i dont want to do something thats healthy, thats when i really should. Im feeling tired. I didnt want to open up today on here. Was going to just wish everyone a goodnight. But i have to force myself to open up and stay connected more bcuz i know of the stories of people who leave and regret it. My mind is like a bad neighborhood, i should never go there alone. And im fully aware of what my addictive mind is capable of. Not going there. I just feel alone even tho im not. I feel like i have nothing valuable to add, which isnt true. I feel scared abit. But i know if i do the next right thing and stay connected, all will be well. I apologize for the ādownā post but i do feel better getting that out of my mind and off my chest. Thanks fam. Now i will wish everyone a good night. Hugs!
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@KarenKW Very big deal to hit 60 days. So proud of you and thrilled to see you progress. Well done!
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Its still just one day at a timeš
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Just checking inā¦ā¦whatās up everyone!!! I hope everyone is blessed this evening. I am on my last night of my 28 day inpatient treatment program and will be out of here tomorrow. Itās bitter sweet because Iām excited to see my wife but anxiety is getting the best of me as my mind tries to think about all the places I used to buy the drink/drink the drink/hide the drink etc. I am massively motivated to achieve my goals and not throw 34 days down the toilet. But it has been a fight today to keep the thoughts out and keep myself occupied. Thank you all for the inspiration!
#IAmStrongerThanTheStruggle
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Day 764
Iām still sober.
Iām still at peace with things & filled with gratitude.
But,
Iām also feeling somewhat blah. A bit of the same 'ole same even with the soon to be seasonal changes coming up.
Iām hoping itās just a sign of unveiling after cocooning inside a lot during the winter.
Maybe Iāve seen enough seasons come & go (no Iām not suicidal; just lost my excited anticipation for some reason).
Whatever the reason for it, I know Iāll march on (stomping if I have to) to get through this period of time sober.
After all, I donāt drink anymore.
So Iāll figure it out. I always do.
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Yep. I feel this!! Except changing āneedā to ādeserveā
Whew the inside of my mind is a scary neighborhood too. Iām sending you love and support! As you most definitely deserve it! 
Hope youāre resting and feel good when you wake up 
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Checking in with 8 days. Fun hike today in the snow of So Cal. Evenings are tough - worried about insomnia and just waiting to see if it will strike. BUT, I wonāt drink myself to dreams.
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Day 
Well, yeah my sleeping habints are not the best and that really has room to be managed and improved. Itās just all my life I was night owl. Barely few times I went to bed before 23:00. Also I worked 9 years night job before. At previous jobs I mostly slept for 7 / 7+ hours before. At this job they changed lunch break from 1 hour to 30 minutes. At winter time they change it back to 1 hour when there is less jobs. That is really what I donāt like, I usually liked to finish my lunch in like 20 and then take a nap for 40 minutes especially after workout day. To not break trucking laws, now we mostly do our 
Truck Tachograph Pause for 15 minutes whenever is possible and then 30 minutes after 4.5 hours.
I really need to work on this because that always was my biggest trigger before. Itās just at evening I donāt want to sleep, but I always wake up tired. Lately I kind of used to this and not feeling that bad. Especially when days get longer and there is much more Sun 
Still I know I can improve it and I remember last years I was going to sleep at 11 most of the time.
Also I try to take a nap whenever is possible. Sometimes I get successful!
Blockquote
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150 days of Freedom @Scorpn !
Well done and enjoy your day! You are the one who got yourself up there ODAAT, Big congrats!
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Thank you @Alisa ! You have always been here for me and i couldnāt have gotten here without you!
This place and the people i have met here have been absolutely instrumental in my recovery!
Lots of for you
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For you and for @Butterflymoonwoman and all others who go to the bad and funky parts of the neighborhood in your/their/ my mind, you/we/I all absolutely deserve and need the support and love and dialog with our support peeps who help us stay on these sober addiction free journeys.
Lots of love to you, hope youāll sleep well. Be so proud of your achievement and hold it close. ODAAT.
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