Why isn’t depression a one-and-done thing? At least I know the warning signs (after 4 years) and speak with my psychiatrist every 4 weeks.
My sleep is off. I want to stay in bed all day. Daily hygiene is a major chore.
I think an upcoming trip across the pond to scatter my Dad’s ashes is messing with my mind. Staying in the home of my childhood abuser can’t help either.
This is when my focus on numbers helps (distracts) me. If you’ve been here a while you might know that I love ‘pretty’ numbers/sequences. Look what I have my eye on ………
The truth is our DOC’S have no value. They don’t relieve stress, they create it. They don’t cure anxiety, but leave us more anxious. They don’t fill a void, but create one.
But they still trick the mind that they’re giving something of great immense value when in reality, they’re taking away.
So when a milestone or a major trial comes up, my subconscious self tries to compare and scrutinize my new life of recovery to the old life of addiction and the extreme amount of value it places on it. “See Kevin? I told you so! Life with the addiction is soooo much better. Lies! All lies!” By choosing to live without my DOC, I’m not missing out. I’ve finally have a chance to get my life back.
00:45:00 into Day 1
I was down but I WILL get back up!
Taking each kid to their therapists today. Time to reflect on what I need to do going forward whilst it wait!
Day 281. Day 2 of class was great. Really love what im doing and where im going. Grateful, and putting in the work even on the good days so when the bad days come I am prepared. Much love
Day 173. Still af af. Coming up on 6 months. Crazy to think about. I will go days even a week or so now without even thinking about drinking. My routines have all changed so much that I just don’t drink on auto pilot, order tea or water when I eat out and drink water at home. Working out more and more helps me focus on health too. I used to try and fill this hole in my heart with alcohol and no matter how much I drank it would only become more void, I asked God to come in and fill this hole and ever since that day I’ve not had a drink. I hope you all have an amazing day full of sobriety. God bless you all.
Yes I finished Easy Way and it has mind opening points. Brilliant. Did a huge shift’s in my recovery and I am nowhere like before. Still have work to do like I mentioned before but can surely agree those readings made big fundamental ground to grow forward
Thats so cool about ur upcoming trip in June! I am going to be doing the Yosemite Virtual Conqueror Challenge soon. Definitly not the same as the real thing but its exciting. And look at that number!! Im super excited for you!!! Have a great day friend!
I’m finally feeling better. I was so sick. Heat spells, cold spells, sore throat, a temperature and aky for 3 days.
My throat is still a little sore but other then that I’m ok
I stopped by work today to pick up some medicine for the wifey because she is still very sick.
I also told them if they need me that they can call me in anytime
Other then that, I’m back at it on Friday
Yes I finished Easy Way and it has mind opening points. Brilliant. Did a huge shift’s in my recovery and I am nowhere like before. Still have work to do like I mentioned before but can surely agree those readings made big fundamental ground to grow forward 
Morning Check in 
proud of u friend!
