Mine is a Critter. Do you remember the old movies? Those creatures with tons of teeth and red eyes that rolled around and could shoot thorns out of their back? This. It really helps to give it a picture or a form.
Sometimes we have to completely break down to realize that this way of using isn’t good for us. Maybe a moment of shame, fear or something we never forget. The ones I had haven’t been hard or dangerous enough, I needed one more. I had that moment while sitting in my Doctors office.
Go on and drink: I die.
Stop drinking: I live.
Checking in day 194! Day 2 of the conference went better. About to get my piercing for my 6 months (been trying to get one piercing per month for my first year of sobriety- we’ll see if I keep finding space haha).
Should hopefully have a pretty chill night ahead after (I am squeezing in one client but that’s all).
I’m trying to catch up on this thread. Been busy yesterday and today. I first saw it and laughed because I thought you were in day 39.5 but your post was yesterday. I am at 38.5 now so you are 39.5 now.
I had so many bad moments…
They were worse enough!
I don’t want to hit any rock bottom…
Just don’t understand why it’s coming out of relaxed situations and why I am acting completely convinced in this moment
That’s the addiction… And to me this one is a real ugly side of its face. Thanks for this picture, there are a lot of good gifs if you search for creature
By the way, I am back home safe.
And I never store alcohol in my house…
Had a good swim workout and found a partner to do some diving sets in the end. That was fun.
Day 83 for me. Lots of drama it seems like, yet when I pull away and spend time solo or with friends there is none.
I am trying to be like a mountain, the seasons can change around me and sometimes rocks or avalanches will crumble down my sides. Animals come in the spring, and flowers, and sometimes people come and travel to see me yet I can be covered in storm clouds and not visible or accessible to them. But no one says on those days “oh I bet the mountain isn’t even there anymore” or “I hate this mountain for having weather that makes it difficult to visit sometimes” they just say “perhaps tomorrow will be a clearer day” and then the next day the clouds part and there are maybe waterfalls and streams flowing once again down the mountain face.
Right now my mountain is in a storm and I’m just trying to remain resilient and steadfast, reliable and calm. Tomorrow is a new day and perhaps the clouds will part.
353 days.
We made it to the weekend!!
Still not but I’m glad we have some time for rest. There is a Crab Festival happening in my town, we are known for it here. Lots of yummy food and drinks and music happening all weekend. Going to go check it out later on. Heading to the gym and my daughters swimming lesson first up.
Trying to shake work from my brain. It’s hard when it consumes all your thoughts all week. I may have to try meditate for a while today I think.
Much love guys. I’m not far off 1 year again, how exciting. I haven’t had a year sober since 2016.
Stick around and keep coming back no matter what Frank. You are truly welcome here. A lot of wisdom within the posts from people struggling and who have overcome the struggles by sharing, serving, and encouraging.
chilling playing Elden ring
644 days AF, though. Hope everyone has a lovely weekend.
but I’m glad we have some time for rest. There is a Crab Festival happening in my town, we are known for it here. Lots of yummy food and drinks and music happening all weekend. Going to go check it out later on. Heading to the gym and my daughters swimming lesson first up.