Thank you 
, cause I was not certain where I was heading financially 
.
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Sorry you are still struggling with sleeping 
.
But thanks for sharing this. Itās so easy to make the excuses and then feel bad about making themā¦which leads to guilt/shameā¦lack of motivationā¦more excuses. Another vicious cycle. Sometimes itās best just to push through. I never regret workouts or walking even when I feel like Iām too tired or depressed. Just like I never miss waking up sober, even if cravings were hella bad the night before. It feels good to stay strong. 
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Yes, weāre a colorful mix on here, Iām German as well 
Welcome to the family and to sobriety 
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Iām done today, with everything 
Iām tired and my mood dropped in the last hour. Donāt know why. Ups and downs, this is how it goes.
Damn hormones, behave you little monsters!
Iāll probably order food, I have zero energy today for anything left.
I just want to arrive at home, take a shower, eat and read here.
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Good plan! Take care of you, Sabrina.
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Hey gal! I went thru those packing lists with my kids back in the day. The lists can become a bit ridiculous. And I got frustrated as hell. My daughter pitching fits about the most piddly items. I hope your son has a ball!
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Love back to you Bud, thx fellow traveller 
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Checking in with 26 days sober. I just wanted to share my thoughts this morning that recovery so far has been HARD. I am SO glad Iām not drinking because I know exactly where that leads, and my heart has been so full with gratitude for the support from this forum and helping me get through a potential relapse. But damn if I donāt wake up every day exhausted with a twitching eyelid and a headache and no energy and all these emotions that are hitting me that I canāt escape from anymore. I feel like I really need to quit my horrible job but then I question whether I should be making any big decision as I have very little trust in myself. Or what if not quitting is actually the wrong decision, I donāt know! My head hurts so bad I canāt think well.
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Rosaā¦youre speaking my mind. I dont want to avoid the situation. I want to face it, and pass. And grow in courage so that the next time I do it with even more confidence and certainty.
I have a really tricky weekend coming up as its a good friends birthday and the celebration is happening at our house. I know there are going to questions from her about me not drinking. Ive rehearsed the answers in my head. I have a plan. Iāve been keeping a journal, I have this community. If that turns out not to be enough I will have to start thinking about making some really tough decisions.
Btw checking in day 17ā¦examining my feelings around this made me face up to some real bullshit lurking within, like feeling apologetic about not wanting to drink, as though I am somehow ruining their evening. That needs to goā¦Iām done with that
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Right on, Marc! Well done on your 17 days! What I might suggest for your party is to include in your plan a way to take breaks, an escape plan so to speak. If you are feeling overwhelmed, have and have a safe, quiet space in your home, make that your sanctuary and use it. If you need to take a walk for some fresh air or just step out, do it. Feign a headache or just say āIāll be right backā or simple slip away in the bustle of it if itās a large gathering. You have to choice to do anything in your power to keep yourself safe and to not drink.
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Thanks for thisā¦ I will add it to the plan. Itās a really good suggestion
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I do 
Iām in my jammies and the pizza is almost done.
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And Iāll just add that we have old friends we havenāt seen in quite a few years coming to visit this weekend and they will be drinking at times with my husband. It brings back memories of our times together, always a glass or bottle in hand. Theyāre decent, mature folks and have left their party ways behind long ago so I am not concerned about any reactions from them but I am aware of some romanticizing drinking. Reminiscing about the past. It will be great to see them on new terms as we are all at different places in our lives. But itās important for me to be self aware, recognize my thoughts and feelings and understand where theyāre coming from but keep my self strong on my current path. Self awareness is so potentially powerful and it sounds like youāre well on your way. 
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Day 15 and thriving
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Day 10 and another good day, no craving today, sunny here so was on my balcony reading with my cat, eating healthier as well and journalling, occured to me on a walk in the countryside today that ive never really enjoyes the act of drinking, and found guilty (maybe because i grew up in a house of alcoholism?) Therefore associated alcohol with chaos, anyways sure helps to not alsoā¦ also occured i drink as im shy and have terrible social anxiety, again i can work on that with my psychiatrist, glad ill be seeing him friday with a new med (and life!) Plan ā¦ hope all you lovelies are well 
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I called them and they told me to make a new email and retake the assessment
I did it just this morning and passed
Iām not in yet
But Iām trying
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Day 13
Stay strong everyone
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