Ah man — It’s great that your skills are in high demand but sucks that you are not paid accordingly for your time and effort along with additional parts if needed.
I know here in Michigan (not sure if all of the US) you do not have to buy your own tools and you are quoted for base price to check out the issue and if anything beyond that quote comes up (ie. took more time or needed seal etc) then you are called immediately and notified of additional costs. I know many times I have taken my car in for one thing that was quoted at say $150 and gotten a call with other issues and ended up spending $1000 to fix the issue. Totally understand that some things can’t be easily diagnosed just by looking at the car and I’m not sure that the diagnostic machines are 100% effective.
Since you purchased your own tools - you do get to take them with you to next job – correct?
I do hope the management at your new job is better than the last. We spend so much time at our jobs - should at least enjoy it (at least most days).
I am feeling kind of all over the place today. I’m feeling a little overwhelmed by all that I need to get done and want to do. I went to a CODA meeting this morning, said no to the donuts somebody brought in. I wanted one or 5 so bad! Now that I’m getting through the no weed and relationship ending for good, i find myself wanting to binge eat… this has always been a struggle in my life. Quitting weed has helped with the cravings for sure. But i find when I’m anxious or overwhelmed i want to gorge myself with sweets. It’s just another thing that i have to manage and it’s hard to do it all at once. I’ve been eating pretty healthy but the sweets call my name. I’ve been exercising at least 10 minutes a day for now. The goal is 20 to 30. When i do keep up on my exercise everything seems to fall into place. There is so much that i need to fix with myself… it’s overwhelming… then the cycle continues…ugh. Anyway ill be adding OA mettings to the list. Today i am focusing on cleaning the house and another meeting. I also need to do a therapy assignment and exercise.
Ah babe - this is a totally no judgement zone. you are being more hard on yourself than need be.
I do believe that whenever we try to better ourselves (eating, drinking, drugs, exercise,…etc-- we will so be tested on the way. The good life is not easy to get to or obtain (with all the temptations around us) but oh is it so worth it when we do life it.
Stay strong my friend! How as the online meeting? If it was not helpful - look for others. Find one that you can connect with. I do hope you find a sponsor soon but in the mean time -we are all here for you.
I’m sending you loads of love and a big hug! Sleep well my friend but make a list of ways to keep yourself occupied when the urge hits. Again - we are all here for you with absolutely no judgement. Love remember we are all recovering from one or multiple addictions here and have gone through many replapses ourselves. It’s ODAAT for us all. I swear, I am on this site so much that my family is now teasing me - it is the one thing that is keeping me sane and addiction free.
If your family has expectations of you, that is on them. You are not responsible for how they feel. Of course we want to meet the needs of the people we love, but we also have a right to our own needs.
Rather than focusing on how you feel you are falling short in the eyes of others, what is something you can focus on to make today a bit better for yourself? I hope you can find something to bring a little bit of light to the darkness
it’s a new day now but when I went home from the party I went to my room closed the door and watched tv in the dark. didn’t talk to anyone or let anyone bother me and I calmed down fairly quickly. tonight I’m hanging out with a friend
I’m off the smokes again too (month in so far) and look forward to celebrating a year, although I know it is a way off yet. I am also thinking about sugar but not quite ready yet I don’t think. Bravo to you!
Having been in my new place for a year now, it was definitely the right choice. I knew what baggage I would be bringing with me, but I have it in a beautiful place and that definitely helps! I think a fresh start sounds like a great idea
@Catmama23 I’ve been exactly where you are right now more times than I can count. I’m not judging you. I’m happy to see you jumped right back into sobriety after you fell.
Day 105.
Today I’m leaving my little seaside heaven and I’m a little sad about it. Like… this was my daily dog walk! This place is awesome.
But… I’ve grown a lot while here. Despite my ups and downs, I’ve started leaving the house every single day and procrastinating less. Now… onto the next adventure!
I really hope that u get some time for u to just unwind. That all sounds very overwhelming and exhausting the binge eating got really bad for me too when I quit using as did other areas. Years ago in early early recovery, I was attending OA and CA and NA and AA and SA and doing therapy and treatment. It can be very exhausting. I tried to quit everything at once in early recovery and in some instances it made my drug cravings worse. Until i began learning new healthy coping skills, i had nothing to fall back on in the beginning, and even though food wasnt the best option, it was still better than drugs. Overtime things will fall into place for u Recovery is like an onion lol u work on the outside layer and when u peel that layer away, another layer reveals itself. And then we work on that layer for it to come off, and then ANOTHER layer reveals itself that we have to work on. Sometimes we just have to work on and get an handle of one thing at a time it eases the exhaustion and eases the feelings of overwhelm. Hoping ur ok
@Binx@Butterflymoonwoman@Amy30@JazzyS thank you all for your guidance and reassurance… I think I’m still processing and grappling with the shame and disappointment. It was a good online zoom meeting at least and tomorrow is a new day. Each day we get a new start. I’m heartbroken actually. I still feel not great today physically. One day at a time. Probably just need another good nights sleep. Thanks again for pulling me back from the ledge, it helps to hear that I’m not alone and I’m not broken. Virtual hugs and goodnight all. (yes it’s only 6 pm here but I’m looking forward to getting into bed soon )
On day 82 alcohol free. Just trying to take the doctor stuff in stride. Walked jackson…about to read and have a coffee. Next week got mri…stress test and monitor hook up
the binge eating got really bad for me too when I quit using as did other areas. Years ago in early early recovery, I was attending OA and CA and NA and AA and SA and doing therapy and treatment. It can be very exhausting. I tried to quit everything at once in early recovery and in some instances it made my drug cravings worse. Until i began learning new healthy coping skills, i had nothing to fall back on in the beginning, and even though food wasnt the best option, it was still better than drugs. Overtime things will fall into place for u 
(yes it’s only 6 pm here but I’m looking forward to getting into bed soon 
)