This is beautiful, thanks for sharing 
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Iām so sorry youāve endured all of this pain. Thank you for sharing your story. Great pics!! Nature is so healing. I read that just being in or observing nature for a short time can lower blood pressure, cortisol levels, etc.
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Thank You for listening. I believe I need to share it with someone as it might be better option when get drunk and fight with my demons. I feel like my inner wounds are healed, but it takes time. After my father srabbed me I had long period of post traumatic events. It lasted very long. If it would be different story if that would have been done by unknown person, but it was my father and it was very hard to accept. That day when I smashed window with my fist, I was very drunk and my wife said I screamed that I was going to go to kitchen and finish what my father had started. Maybe when I saw my hand all wound opened - it actually saved me from fatal event.
But as I feel it right now it felt like letting it all down, all that pain I focused into that punch and the pain was gone then.
I later started to talk with my father again and we now have healthy relationships again. It was hard for him too. He said that if I would had killed that day he would been killed himself. He also had lots of health problems later. He was blaming himself all the time. I forgived Him and I believe that is better for both of us.
Itās not for me to judge and I never judge anyone. We all will have our judgment hour at the end. No one is without sin.
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Wow kevin! Big congratulations to you friend 
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Congratulations 
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Sending strength. You know it wonāt help in the long run. 
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Day 988
Pride comes before a fallā¦was so pleased of myself for cleaning the windows, the cooker, sewing my daughterās dance costume, etc, on my day off that I totally forgot my daughterās dentist appointment tonight. It is a special braces appointment, and our first one, and only available once a month, so have to wait a month to get another one. I hate that I will seem flaky to the dentist. Oh well, I canāt do anything about it now. Will have to ring tomorrow and apologise profusely. The amount of things that I āforgotā when I was drinking (actually I was just drunk and couldnāt leave the house because people would be able to tell) it is funny how much it bothers me now.
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Hey all, checking in on day 1,046. I hope everybody has a good one!
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Checking in Good morning 
to allā¦gratefully awake but sleepyā¦Iām at a week but realized yesterday Iām still in a deep fog when I got to my car and realized I had left my keys in the middle of the dollar store lol. If thatās the worse of a boring day Iām happyā¦everybody stay strong at one day or 5 years just keep going!
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Morning Check In
Day 437
Morning everyone!
Starting my day off with a hot coffee while getting my son ready for school. Seems to be a beautiful day out there today. On todays agendaā¦ grocery shop for odds n ends, a workout, and some self care. Maybe even a nap in the early afternoon. Thats about it. Hope everyone has an addiction free day!
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Sweet, good on ya.
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Day 14
Second checkinā¦
Constantly thinking about drinking would be okay and wanting a drink to treat myself.
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It wouldnāt be a treat. Just the beginning of a new horror show for you.
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We actually talked about that. Our son moved out to Carolina with his GF so thereās a spare room now. It would probably benefit her more anyways cause I know Iām a motherfucker to sleep next to,
I toss and turn constantly. Weāll probably have to do that a couple nights a week, neither of us can run off 5-6 hours sleep like we used to be able to.
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As far as podcasts go. I bounce back and forth between Recovery Elevator and The Shair podcast on the hour drive to and from work. Thereās a couple hundred episodes of each so Iām good for a while. 
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Day 207 alcohol free
Day 15 social media free
My mood is getting better 
Work day is done, now heading home. But first Iāll visit the best Asian restaurant in town (in my opinion 
) to get food for the evening 
Havenāt been there for several weeks because I was going by bike and I have to use a different route then.
So great to see some of you improving and collecting sober days 
Awesome!
I wish you a beautiful sober day friends, stay strong 
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Checking in day 80ā¦ wanted to share a picture of the doggo im adopting this week. To say that im excited is an understatement. My cousin is the breeder of this particular dog. Ive been wanting to get a pup from him but just donāt have the time for a pup right now. Adoption is perfect for me because this dog already knows all the basic commands, has been house broken, microchipped, fixedā¦ and up to date on all of her shots. I need this right now, im very lonely and its starting to put me in a funkā¦ went from a very busy house of 6 to just me in the matter of just a few months and im struggling with the adjustment. A companion is exactly what i need right now for the company. This will also help me keep my promise to myself which was one full year of no dating at all. Im taking this time to work on me and my situation. Anyways, hope everyone is doing well and holding up. Peace and loveā¦Billy
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