@JazzyS good for you! That’s a hard one to kick. Be proud of yourself.
4 Likes
I’m glad it’s Friday. Been a weird and long week. Feeling a bit triggered by a former friend but it’s just a reminder to stronger boundaries. No cravings for alcohol so I’m good.
9 Likes
Checking in, late today. It’s been more ups and downs and I have got to stop beating myself up for not accomplishing what my expectations think I need to do. Shit takes time and I still need me time and to keep some routines as much as possible. As I continue realizing these things about myself and learning then I’ll continue growing and doing better. A first sober move to a new house is a big deal and I have to give myself some credit. My husband and I sat on the patio for a while and talked about how peaceful it was, and that is my piece of joy for the day. I accept. And am grateful.
15 Likes
Checking in sober day 5. I don’t crave the alcohol. I crave the escape. Alcohol is just the only legal, easily available option. But I know I need to stay sober and deal with why I feel the need to escape. That’s the hard part. Been crying a lot and at everything. I may try to go to bed early. My anxiety may have different ideas.
Take care of yourselves.
OFDAAT
19 Likes
I wish you the best for a restful night, Karen. I can relate so much. It’s not been a good week for sleep for me but sleep meditations and the Calm app help me at least relax some so my body can get rest. Good luck.
6 Likes
Thanks Rosa. Sometimes the sleep meditations help and other times they make me more restless and agitated. Right now I have the baseball game radio broadcast on my phone. That often helps. Hope you have a restful night too. 
5 Likes
As weird as it sounds, I listen to my favorite true crime show and it helps me fall asleep…don’t know what that says about me 
4 Likes
Staying sober another meeting today. Hit day 39 today.
13 Likes
Facts I totally agree 
100%
3 Likes
Thank you and congratulations to you as well!
4 Likes
Congratulations @JazzyS !
So happy for you! So Proud of you! So Very Thankful for you! You and your Jazzy Love and Caring has helped all of us! Big hugs and lots of love.
Celebrate today and each day going forward!
P.S. The meme came misspelled… we will just accept it as someone’s best effort.
10 Likes
Thank you so much my beautiful friend! You are too sweet - i love your kind words and LOVE the meme (such a free spirit) - the misspelling just adds to the beauty of it. 
6 Likes
So here’s a fuller picture. I left my therapist at 1 in the afternoon on Thursday. Her office is unfortunately less than a block away from a liquor store. I’d already decided to go to the hospital after the meeting, but I was of course feeling tempted anyway.
I forced myself to wait for the bus and headed to the ER. “Just go get the help you need” I told myself. It’s been 2 days of blood tests, x-rays, and a CT scan, mostly bad news. I have gall stones and something that could be a tumor. 
Tomorrow they’re going to knock me out and stuff a tube down my throat and maybe some other tests. I’ll write more when I get more results.
Congratulations to all those with birthdays and everyone stay strong! 
12 Likes
Glad you could check in with an update. Hoping whatever is going on will have an easy solution. That’s what I’m focused on for you. To your best health and sobriety!
5 Likes
@bt824 congrats on day 2! Grateful that you did find AA to be helpful – keep showing up for yourself!
@anon53116147 YEAH to Aug 1st – glad that got sorted out. Have a great time camping with your girls this weekend.
@jennyH Thank you! I do hope you find time to relax and unwind this weekend.
WOW – this is a great revelation (I know my mind has tried to go to the “ah fuck today’s a bust ill try again tomorrow” mentality and its like 9 am (LOL) Thank you for this – I will have to keep this in mind. I’m sorry that you have to wait till next week to get the your sons results but very proud of how you were able to view and handle the situation.
@geng thanks Genevieve! Grateful that you did walk to your meeting today – so lovely to see you doing so well in your sobriety.
@catmancam Thanks friend – appreciate you! Check you out – up to 14 min today! Sorry about your depression – hope the nap and audio books helped.
@noshame It is hard at the beginning but like you said – making it through and coming home not smelling of nicotine – realizing that your sense of smell, taste are improving. Hey – if auto pilot is what gets you through the first bit then do it – I know I was super grumpy and thankful that my family was supportive – sounds like you have a very supportive wife so I know you can get through this. Keep strong
@SHAUND Well done on resisting for another day! Keeping busy and staying active here were my two main tools.
@amy30 Sorry that you are still struggling but grateful that you being proactive in setting up your tools to make sure you don’t relapse. You are worth living a addiction free life my friend and you do have the strength to not turn to alcohol to help with your funk. I do hope that you start feeling better soon.
This is beautiful Paul – thanks for sharing your excitement. Well done on another month under your belt!!
10 Likes
@Danam56 than you – glad you were able to work on stronger boundaries and protecting your sobriety. How are you recovering from you surgery? Well done with your sober time!
@rosacando Glad that you were able to see that shit does take time and hopefully you will be able be kinder to yourself and not have such high expectations – you are kicking ass with all that you are accomplishing and I do hope that you see this too. Glad you and hubby were able to sit on porch and enjoy the peace
@karenkw well done on day 5. I do hope that you are able to get a good night’s rest and hoping for a better day for you tomorrow. Alcohol will not help with anything and deep down I know you know this too. Sending you strength and comfort.
@dryln785 Thank you for keeping us posted my friend. I do hope that you are able to get treatment that you need and start feeling better and that your condition is manageable and not too nothing serious.
Checking in on Friday evening
212 days weed and alcohol free (aka 7 months)
627 days cigarette free
Thank you to everyone for your lovely congrats! I can’t believe it and among the happy feeling of making it this far i did also go into a spout of sadness and depression as my body did not feel so hot and is in a lot of pain and really am not seeing any changes – i know many changes have occurred but i couldn’t think of any - not the ones that i expected to see by now (pause for a deep breath) … i know recovery is different for everyone and it is not linear. I am grateful to be in recovery and to have you all here with me. We really are stronger together! ODAAT! Sending much love -
17 Likes
Checking in @Day #50
Quick hi-lights:
Spent 2 weeks on/off (3 sep visits) in ER - symptoms and diagnosed with:
- Liver Failure
- Liver Damage
- Cirrhosis
- Extreme Dizziness
- Painful bowl movements - dehydration
- Loss of appetite
- Weight loss - 215lbs in 2022 to 145lbs in 2023
- Jaundice
- Itchiness of skin to where blood was drawn
- On and off Chest pains due to Reflux
- Major fatigue/weakness
Lost everything in California:
- Laid off in Jan ‘23
- Still unemployed - as a result:
- Turned keys over to my apartment 7/13
- No where to go…rejection from family (some)
- Moved to Florida - didn’t pan out, 1 week there
- Moved to Texas - much better, (family, support)
*2 different Dr’s said if I relapse I won’t come back
*I’ve had to claim bankruptcy
*My car was repo’d while in ER - in auction now
I’ve hit the bottom and the only way is up now
My focus is:
- Re-establishing my walk with the Lord
- Sustain Sobriety ODAAT
- Separate myself from negative family
I’m getting stronger and most symptoms have disappeared. I’m in a much better place staying with my Aunt and Uncle, (who truly are God-sent) to support me, encourage me love on me and provide resources to succeed.
Thank you for listening and thank you for all your support and encouragement as well. 
25 Likes
Wow @CATMANCAM you just replied to 23 people! How thoughtfull and kind!
And about fill in time…I know the cat shelter I used to volunteer for always needed help. Not only for cleaning 
we also had volunteers to cuddle the cats and play with them. Just thinking…
6 Likes
Day 27. Up at 5.40am. Not much of a sleeper. Will tidy the apartment and then make a coffee and listen to some music i think. Tinnitus is pretty rubbish at times, but not too bad. Saw barbie yesterday. It wasn’t as good as the hype but it was nice to be in a full cinema. I don’t really spend much time out of the house as i work from home !
Today: raining again but its Saturday so all good. Drinking alcohol free guiness. And i know for some folks the alcohol free beers aren’t a good idea, but for me they are at this stage.
14 Likes
Thanks Billy @Soberbilly and Jazzy @JazzyS and @CATMANCAM .You are all fantastic humans! 
Day 20
Two shortish walks. My AA meeting was good. I’m starting to feel a wee bit more comfortable now. Weather is still lovely and I feel very fortunate for that. My family is good, dogs are good. My boyfriend went fishing late last night (he’s obsessed) and caught a Shark! I know not everyone is a fan of hunting/fishing. But he’s as humane as you can be about it.
Tomorrow, I might try jogging. I used to jog a lot, and I miss it. I’ll probably walk to the local high school track as a warm-up, jog, and walk back for a cool down. That’s the plan, anyway 
. We’ll see if I chicken out.
Love you guys! 
21 Likes