Checking in! Still sober. Today was a rough. I spent a lot of time feeling guilt, regret and shame about my substance abuse. I’m so mad at myself that I let it get so out of hand. 
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Boring day at work. I had more energy than yesterday so I kept busy with random things. Nothing to write home about. Nothing bad, nothing good. Just another day. Feeling fine 
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Checking in.
Just checking in.
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Morning Jasmine. Thank you so much for the reply. Feeling much better after some rest. ODAAT X
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Day 68. Woken up with really sore throat, feels swollen. I will work this am then rest .need to have some time off work i think
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That sounds hard. Is it a group or one on one? Maybe try do it by your self at home, maybe easier in the start 
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So happy to see you, and that you keep pushing.
Congrats with your 90days
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Day 143 checking in sober
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I’m kinda getting ready to be crucified for this post, but this is just wrong. There’s something inherently wrong about you saying you saw a woman posting a selfie on this forum and got triggered.
Was there anything inappropriate about said selfie, or was this person just posting a photo of themselves… existing?
Why did you put ‘humanize’ in quote marks? Why did you need to tell yourself this person is ‘suffering’ in order to see them as a human being with thoughs and feelings and ideas and ambitions?
And why are you looking at the selfie thread if the mere existence of a woman living her life is triggering?
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Check in for day 2.
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I may be wrong, and don’t want to speak for anyone, but I think the use of ‘humanise’ was referring to one of the steps needed in recovering from PMO. One of the difficulties of that particular addiction is that the brain has rewired to not see the person beneath the body. He is taking considered steps to help.
I am triggered by a lot of things here, some of the language used around PMO is too much for me due to past experiences, but I still want to stick around and obviously don’t want them not to post, but every now and then I do come across something that triggers uncomfortable memories. I think it is hard for that particular addiction as they must have to be constantly on their guard here and to fully engage with the community means exposing themselves to triggers.
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1545
Five more shifts till my vacation. Yay! A late one to work today. That’s fine. This is my best job ever. So far. Working in addiction care gives me so much inspiration. Sober and clean. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Love from Westerpark.
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Morning all, checking in. Was lazing in bed having a coffee but the neighbours are having their hedge cut back and a man’s head just popped over the top. That is me shamed into getting up and being productive 
We have 2 clear days now with no plans and it is making me a bit jittery. I have always been so protective over my energy levels (well, since getting chronic fatigue in 2013), but now I am finding myself anxious if I am not doing something. They say Type A personalities are susceptible to chronic fatigue syndrome and I can see why. Thank you @JazzyS for your wonderful reply yesterday. I think I am in danger of pushing myself too much. I went swimming yesterday even though exhausted. I can’t seem to stop myself though!? When I was younger I had an ED for control reasons and can see me approaching this in a similar way now. Sorry, this is a mind dump now, lots to think about.
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Day 20*
Really ready for the long holiday weekend. Have plans with someone I met from a wedding a few weeks back which is just bizarre. I can’t remember the last time I made an adult friend but we just clicked. I’m sure she probably noticed I wasn’t drinking at the wedding but just to be safe when we were talking about plans I mentioned I don’t drink. I also have a picnic with my sober group this weekend. Feeling really grateful for all these connections.
I have my first appt with my new psych booked. I am hopeful but mostly just flat out dreading it. I reached out to my aunt to let her know I was thinking about her. She was really grateful for the check-in and we made some loose plans. I’m already panicking about how it’s going to go if she’s still drinking. Glad I’m starting new therapy, these thought patterns aren’t helpful.
Happy almost Friday everyone.
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Checking in on day 4, it was a lovely misty walk this morning, I can feel the weather starting to change and I love autumn, I didn’t sleep well again last night
So not as long a walk as yesterday, as I’m pretty exhausted, been doing a bit of soul searching into dark places to find out why I really use alcohol and substances and trying to journal it, probably one of the reason’s why I’m not sleeping too great as I’m going digging, but I’m still here and sober, have a great day everyone 
@JennyH you should have just gave him a wave 
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Haha, I pulled the curtains instead
Loving the autumn feel coming from your post, it is definitely approaching fast 
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Hey all, checking in on day 1173. I hope everybody has a good one!
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Checking in on day 89. I decided to take the higher dose of my medication last night because I wanted a good sleep, but I was still awake from 5.25 this morning. I’m glad I have no firm plans for today. I made sourdough starter last night before bed so I’ll bake that now. I have had a bath, did three ohms under a cold shower, which felt really good, and I’ve made my breakfast smoothie which I’ll just take my time over.
I told my parents that I was struggling a bit and my mum suggested they check in with me more frequently for a while which I’m grateful for.
Wishing everyone an addiction free day.
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Absolutely this! They put themself in a triggering situation at the expense of a woman on this forum them come seeking praise for “humanizing” her. That whole post feels gross. I want to flag the post, but also don’t want people to not see it.
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Maybe you should just not look at the selfie thread if you are not capable of handling, Its even more odd that you are seeking praise for “humanizing” a literal human on this site so I will give it to you. Congratulations on putting yourself in a bad situation then giving the bare minimum in human decency.
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