Checking in for day 19.
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Sober Saturday. 
. Just checking in.
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Hope u enjoy ur day and get the rest u need to ease ur pain friend 
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23.40 hours clean and sober
Today at 4:45pm Iāll have 25 days no vape/ciggs
Work today in about a hour
Iāll be out late but itās cool 
today Iām going to be the hardest worker there. Yesterday I worked hard but I didnāt do exactly as good as I usually do
Iām on the 2mg lossinge for nic and I take 1 about every 2 hours
I donāt want to buy anymore but I might. Iām not sure yet
Yesterday morning I smoked CBD with a little THC in it. It got me uncomfortable and it was hard to communicate the right way
I would rather be clear headed anytime and I also have some medicine to fall back on if I need to as a crutch
Today will be a good day 
P.s. Someone said they could have a good day and not know it. That sticks to me. Your worst day could actually be, unknowingly the best day of your life.
Take care
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Donāt know If I forgot the check in today.
Day 31.
Iām here, Iām alive and Iām sober.
And I have anxiety because I have to go back to work on Monday.
Didnāt get better when my mother called and talked for 2,5 hours again yesterday.
I donāt have the heart to hang up on her,or to tell her not to call or anything like that.
I know sheās alone. And I guess I can handle it as long as I donāt have to spend time with her in person or go on another vacation with her.
Besides that my best friend (we have been friends for over 20 years) have started to flirt with my sister who I donāt talk to,and havenāt for years.
Iām not sure what I think about that. (Okey, honestly I donāt like it,a bit) but I guess itās up to them.
Iāve already told him that of they get together thereāll be no family gatherings that involves me,ever.
And if it get serious and they marry I wonāt show up on that wedding no matter what.
Seems harsh,but I mean it.
I really want him to be happy,but not with my sister.
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Thank you Dana 
Hope you are having a fantastic day 
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Checking in 590 days AF 
Celebrated my sons birthday with familygathering. I keep myself so togheter not letting the anxiety gets me.He is so happy with the day.
And now when everyone have left, husband one place, daugther other place, only me and my son and the F****** anxiety kills me. I feel like Im dying, I hate this I feel so stupid and weak.
Birthdayboy is in his room playing videogames with friends, at least he dont see
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Checking in, 43 days sober.
I feel like I could relapse tonight. I would numb myself with a bottle of wine. Tomorrow I would wake up hating myself and most probably hangovered and even more depressed. Thatās why I will not drink tonight. I will not give that sneaky motherfucker satisfy, this addicted voice in my head telling me itās a good idea to have some wine. Good wine, not the cheap one (like itās changing anything).
Anyway I numb myself with Diazepam today. Iām not taking it often, only when I really need it cause of nerves, max 1-2 times in the month. But now Iām disappointed cause I donāt have energy for running, which I was planning for tonight.
Well, maybe tomorrow gonna be a better day.
Im.not.going.to.relapse.tonight.
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Iām grateful that you know what a liar that voice can be. Maybe a rest day is what you need? I do hope that you can stay strong and find ways to silence that voice. We are here for you if you need to vent out the frustrations. Sending you strength my friend
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Oh my sweet friend - i am so sorry that you are experiencing this today. Glad that you were able to enjoy your sonās birthday (happy birthday to him). You are not stupid or weak! You have been dealing a shit ton of emotions and physical feelings - it is a lot! Are you able to call someone over or to do face time. Do you want to talk it out here? Sometimes just writing it out helps release the anxiety and gives it less power.
Are you able to practice deep breathing, meditations or maybe screaming into a pillow? Here for you friend - you are not alone! Great job on your 590 days!
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Day 48. My anxiety is super high today, so getting things done seems difficult. Trying to find motivation though! Have a great Saturday everyone! 
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Thanks Jasmine, I let myself vent today on other topic earlier and it helped a little.
Just feeling hopeless and helpless lately but yeah, not planning to drink anymore. Not today. ODAAT
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Oh Charlie, what a treasure to see!! Congratulations on your 1,000 days!! Enjoy your time with the littles!!
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Glad to hear youāre at home for the weekend. I think it says something when your parents notice a difference already and in your posts Iād noticed a slightly different sound as well. Pretty sure itās tough work at the treatment centre and no fun at all but itās positive that you see the need to go through that process and getting to know your issues and work on it. Iām sure youāll start to feel stronger soon.
Iām glad you didnāt leave the treatment!
Keep your head up and fight for yourself and a better life for yourself. You can make it!
And feel free to vent at any time 
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Glad youāre here and sharing Binx. I hope you can turn the corner on this anxiety.
I donāt get major anxiety attacks per say. But this one time Iāll never forget. It was horrible. Totally unexplainable and unexpected. I was so frightened.
#fuckanxiety
We got your back.
Big hug to you.
Unless of course thatās gonna make you more anxious 
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It truly is odaat! We are here for you. Glad ypu found some comfort in venting earlier.
Much love my friendā¦you are stronger than this addiction.
So sorry for these feelings - hope they dont last long. Sending you positive vibes
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Checking in.
Gridlock traffic, I wanna be done with this workday already,. I aināt feeling it today. Where the hell is everybody going. ,
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Thank you for your kind words, they really warm
I know Im not, but I still feel like that.
Why cant I just be normal, and enjoy the days, my kids and spending time with them, when they smile and laugh. I love it, but the anxiety and pain make me suffer through the moments.
The worst part is not the anxiety in it self, but the pain and all the symptoms in my body.
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Ah Binx, sorry to hear about the anxiety attack but itās good youāve got your doctor appointment coming up. Youāve always been so supportive of me when I feel stuck so I just want to send you a hug for support. My go to for avoiding anxiety and depression is somatic breathing exercises which I do every morning and night and sometimes throughout the day. Niraj Naik does a really good guided breathing exercise that I really enjoy. Vagus nerve stimulation by turning the shower to cold once youāve finished washing is also helpful. Hope you feel better soon. X
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