23 days. I know some folk don’t count their days but I take satisfaction from it. Even a small bit of something helps. It’s about small wins right?
I have a work do on Saturday night. There will be a lot of booze there but I’m driving and plan to run long on Sunday morning so I don’t have any feear. I just need to turn up stick around for maybe 2 hours and I’ll bounce. No major concerns of breaking out.
Looking forward to having some serious time under.my belt come Xmas… I know it’s a way off but I did Xmas sober last year and it was bliss… Small wins right?
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Very tired today. Feeling weak, physically. So of course it was unusually busy for a Thursday night. And of course I was working with the newbies again. I wanted to try to leave a little early to spend time with my dad for his birthday but that didn’t happen. And I didn’t make it to a the store in time to get him a card 
(yeah, I’m that girl who signs a card in the store parking lot on the way to their house 
) At least my daughter made him a nice card. And we had dinner and game night yesterday. Pictionary was a fun time.
It’s been pretty humid today but it just started to storm. I don’t have AC so it’s very refreshing. I sleep so good on stormy nights. Which I feel I need tonight.
Right, so, just seconds ago I went to get some water and there was another mouse on my counter. That’d be the 5th sighting this month.
I watched it run under a burner on the stove and disappear. I didn’t even know there were holes in there! Wtf.
Another wtf. I have a friend who used to hang out with me and my ex. Double dating and such. We dont talk a lot anymore, bc he’s gotten into some worse things I have no interest in, but every now and then. Tonight he sent me a video of my ex Fuhuuucked up. Like, I couldn’t even tell what he was on. A year ago I would’ve laughed and been happy he’s still doing shitty shit. I was so angry at him for so long. But now, honestly, I just felt bad for him. He’s a very sick person. I’m so grateful that hatred has passed. It’s such a horrible feeling. I don’t think I’ve forgiven him quite yet for the way he treated my daughter and I (and the cats), but maybe one day.
Off to bed soon. My body feels older than it should. Goodnight 
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I’m here I’m alive and I’m sober.
Day 5
Hospital called and woke me up.
My husband was done with his surgery at 04.00 this morning.
It wasn’t just appendicitis, it was a ruptured appendix and Peritonitis. He gets antibiotics and is supposed to stay at least a week.
It could have turned really bad, really quick.
If something more happens the antibiotics doesn’t help or the infection turns and gets worse, it’s serious. Like in deadly.
Yet I’m not that worried. The kids are, we’ve talked a lot about it last night.
My biggest problem is that I feel so bad for not taking it seriously from the start, and made him go to the hospital quicker. If I’ve done that, it might not have gotten to this point. I should’ve known better. And I should’ve pushed to stay at home from work yesterday.
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Don’t beat yourself up. There’s no way you could’ve known it’d come to this. If it looked like food poisoning, it would make sense to think it was food poisoning. 
to you all
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Thank you. I know I shouldn’t but it’s hard not to. At that time I was the only responsible adult here. And I left for 8 hours to go to work.
I did ask my husband if I Should stay at home. He said it wasn’t needed, andI did call work to ask if I could stay home. But like usual it was a lot of kids (I’m a pre-school teacher) and no substitute to call in.
So I got to work, asked how he felt around lunch time. He said he was okey, a little better.
Got back home and he had gotten much worse, so I called the healthcare information line. And they sent my call to SOS. After that the ambulance came.
But just the thought of how it could have ended. The thought that I more or less left my kid with my husband their father,who was so I’ll that he could’ve died,is just heavy.
No when I think of it,he probably felt better because it was getting worse. The doctor said that you usually do that. If the appendix burst, the pain ease a bit and then it gets worse. I should have at least though that it could’ve been something else but food poisoning.
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1532
Looking at my schedule for the coming 3 weeks, I overdid it with the number of shifts I’ll be working (I do have some influence on my schedule), just so I can have a longer vacation after. Well, let’s take my medicine. And before I know it I’ll be off. At least there will be no hangovers to deal with. And no drunken nights wasted. Less than 3 weeks to go for a whopping 3.5 weeks of holidays. Yay!
Now it’s therapy Friday first. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Sober and clean. Love.
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I am glad he has had the surgery and is on the road to let’s hope a complete and full recovery in a timely amount of time. Of course you are going through it all in your mind, the different scenarios. You are a wonderful mother and a wonderful wife… you are not an ER doc … and you had no way of knowing.
The good thing is he has had good and quick care and surgery. Big hugs. I was so hoping that when you woke up and posted you would have news… and you did, thanks from here. Thinking about all of you. xoxo
@Mno Have a good Friday and the next while, working, and on vacation. You Do work hard! xoxo
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Hey all, checking in on day 1160. I hope everybody has a good one!
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Thank you.
I’m not a medical, but somewhere I feel like it’s basic knowledge, that I apperantly lack.
But at least we managed to get him to the hospital so he could survive. That’s a good thing 
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Definitely not an easy time for you lately Sophia, sending you big hugs and wish you tons of strenght and patience. Hope your husband won’t have any complications and you will have some peaceful time with your daughter.
Checking in 49 days sober. 7 weeks.
Today I started day with cold shower. Well, I finished my shower with cold water to be precise. It feels so good! I used to do this every morning before I lost myself in alco and mornings became a struggle. I will do it every morning again. And I highly recommend it to all of you (there is tons of articles about benefits of cold shower on internet) 
Love, Mischa
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I had a complicated appendectomy 20+ yrs ago. Gangrene had set in and it had grown very large. I had the whole pain and food poisoning symptoms too. It wasn’t nice and I have an unsightly 10cm hernia that distends my tummy on one side that I’ve had surgeons worrying about even this year, but I’m here! I’m confident your hubby will be fine. It’s just not pleasant. 
PS. My ex wife thought it wasn’t serious but I wouldn’t blame yourself.
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Thank you 
Not into the cold shower idea, I’ve also read about the benefits many times. And I’ve tried. Just to spend the rest of the day or night freezing. I’m glad you found something that makes you feel like yourself again. Keep up doing that and keel on looking for the things that makes you feel that way.
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And you can run 50 miles or 50 km!! ( Lots either way)
And stay sober!
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Day 165
I frantically tried to catch up on the last 100+ posts on here. And I see a lot has happened to some of you. So I will leave some Glücksschweinchen (lucky pigs) on here for all of you, my TS family. Take one if you need it. Stay strong!
Picture was taken at a farm park in North Yorkshire about a week ago.
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Hey everyone 
Day 5 and I have been dreading this…the weekend, I don’t know how I’m going to get through this, last weekend I was sober was March and only because I had Covid, weekends are worse, I drink which then usually leads to drugs, I used to drink wine all week and party even harder at the weekend, I managed to tell everyone in my friend circle I was done, they all know (well acquaintance circle I don’t even know if I have true friends anymore) praying I manage this weekend sober hope everyone has a great stress free day 
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I’m sorry you had to go through all that. But I’m glad you’re here and that it went pretty well.
Thank you for your encouraging words.
Hard to not blame myself though. When he had problem with his heart a few years ago (angina pectoris) I called the ambulance instantly. Should’ve done the same thing this time.
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Hello all, checking in. Day 45 I think.
My default seems to be really tired at the moment, but it still very rarely goes into the chronic fatigue tired so I am grateful for that. The kids are out all day so I can work guilt free which is nice. I may even have a nap after work, also guilt free. Either that or a swim and sauna, I will see what my mood is. The point is I have options.
I am sorry to see so many people struggling. Really hope everyone has a positive day. Love the piggies @HolySquid
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One approach would be to detach from all the stories and imaginings going on in the head and get back to the present, no matter how boring and familiar it might be at any particular moment.
Do cats sit around tormenting themselves with a bunch of wild fictional stuff going on in their heads? I have no idea, but I hope not.
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I’m also finishing my shower on cold lately and really enjoying it. The first few times were hard but I now look forward to it and I feel like it sets me up for the day.
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Congratulations on your day 5. Have a plan of some kind. Whatever is helping you stay sober during the week is a good start. Think about staying here where you have support. Write down all the reasons you really want to stay sober. Learn to appreciate the sober you and protect that person from drinking or drugging.
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