Hi all, I am checking in on day 106. I feel like I don’t spend enough time interacting here. I went to a football match on the weekend and enjoyed the sober pre match build up. No regrets. I’ll be off to 
in a few days on holiday - cannot wait to be off work and with the children. Peace out.
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Bon Voyage and have safe and sober holiday.
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Checking in day 351! Just back from a week and half vacation. Was in Provincetown for carnival which was fun and beautiful, but there was a whole lot of drinking around. On the actual day of carnival (a big street party), I only stayed for a half hour and then went back to the hotel for a rest day. Everyone else was hungover the next day, and I got to enjoy the beach and town. Really grateful for this journey. Tired but back at work today.
Wishing everyone a magnificent sober Mon
day
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Hey
I have been away for a while. I am helping a friend lately he is trying to get sober from crack. I live in Quebec and its hard to get help quickly. He has been sober for a week and we found him a place for a therapy.
This experience has helped me a lot with my recovery. I put my limits and help him how I can. I came to realize that i wasnt spending as much time on the app as i did before, which is something i dont want to neglect anymore.
I am starting work tomorrow. Havent been at work since december and starting a new job. I had a hard time sleeping, but i am feeling better tonight.
My son is starting school next week in his new classroom. A program for kids with spécial needs like him.
And my daughter is starting high school.
Something that has changed since I am sober is that the stress doesn’t come. My medication is helping me a lot.
Feels good to write all of this down.
114 days sober of weed
136 days sober of pills 
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2nd evening check in.
With my wife off to a concert, found myself just with the boys. Found myself on YouTube just watching sports videos. This of course is a red flag and is always a Segway to nonsense. I was on my wife’s computer so it’s unprotected. I shut down the browsers and started listening to a recovery podcast followed by calling a friend just to check on him. Those are part of my tools when I’m started to think like a normal person I can just browse and it’s all good. I’m thankful for these reminders and tools cause I honestly want to cut off all roads to porn way before they start and YouTube, even if it’s innocent at the moment, has porn and I cant go there. I’m checking in because it’s important to keep being accountable and document my behavior. Have a good night all.
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Day 674 AF
Hey, gang.
I haven’t checked in a minute. Took a lil break from my phone. Been focused on my health. Still dealing with constant flare-ups and stomach inflammation. The docs can’t figure it out. I had an endoscopy, ultrasound, CT Scan, and blood work. Everything looks good. Gonna try the 24 hr PH monitoring on September 28th. Looks like fun.
I’m still sober. Staying busy with work and the kiddos. My eldest started 5th grade last week. All is good. Hope everyone’s doing well. It’s gonna take me a minute to catch up on here.
Take care, fam.
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Sorry about your cat.
I feel ya. I’ve been going for walks and this teenager on his bike always yells as I pass by. Same kid. Not sure what his deal is. Can’t let it get to me, though.
Hang in there.
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Evening Check In
Day 554
Had a decent day. Was pretty busy. Went to the appt for my sons eyes and honestly it was a waste of time. She checked his eyes again and physically there is nothing wrong with them. I asked about a referral to neurology and she suggested i go thru oncology or his pediatrician to sort that out. So then what was the whole point of this appt?! Idk Anyway, we went shopping for a few things at the grocery store and then went to grab computer ink which was insanely expensive imo ($60 for w cartridge). Came home and we relaxed foe the rest of the day. I had some time to work on my DBT program. Got my worksheet papers printed out for that so im super happy. Tmrw is going to be a much more relaxed day. Kind of looking forward to it. Hope everyone has a good night! 
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Oh my what a day.
Kids off to daycare and camp. 1st time in 3 weeks without 2 or 3 of them bouncing around and think perhaps we needed it.
I drafter the letter to Ombudsman when we got home, then last night drafted the letter to child services - its a stance that more can be done to find a middle ground. We have meetings coming up, and they can be very cold, dry and while we inbthebpast would hang on to meetings and court appearances like something was going to be done, or something be said usually its a bunch of nothing. Just people pushing paper and ticking boxes. Spent today getting some groceries and actually cried a bunch of times. I mean I had the law on me as a teen for being in shit, but I would not have imagined being in our situation and having to fight the law. It is exhausting and I know the secondary trauma from thisbis just so real. I worry about both of my parents, my mom cannot sleep thinking about how she cannot keep caring for her grandson but lettingbhim go indefinitly into a system we know is no good? We have to do better. Im just trying to hone my focus. Its what I do when in working towards something - i block out all the “this is what ysually happens” or what people usually do, or how it usually goes or doubt and neysayers. I almost put blinders on to it, or try to offer decent enough arguments against those points. Doesnt matter whats been done before. Doesnt matter what rhe doubts are, keep your goal in mind and keep chipping. No; you may not hit the target and you cant control the oitcome. But if you want something work at it, and something good will come of that work (even if you dont achieve what youre aiming for - keep your eyes open for the good that comes, not achieving the exact goal). I dont know. Its harder to reimagine and impose a lot of my life lessons on to this situation, becayse I am afraid of losing custofy of my nephew. I am afraid of not achieving this goal, and him getting lost in a foster system that has no means to care for him and bounce him around. But I gotta shut that up. Look at my list and do the next thing.
Did all this, cried and didnt feel like a drink. Have to have a gentle talk with my hubby about his stress level. We have been through so much, and when youre going through it our patience is down. Seems hes in a place where he needs things to go right to feel okay, and its not a place Ive ever seen him in before for so long. Dont want to be bitter and dont want him to be either, we have a beautiful life, beautoful children and we have been through so much…and I still believe, though its hard af in this current situation that something, something good will cone of all of this. It always does, if youre open to it.
Love to you all. Im sorry i was too tired to read your updates today, hopefully tomorrow I can do that. Always appreciate hearing how everyone is doing. Hope everyone has another 24. Keep chippin’.
Xo.
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I think you handled that very well and I do hope that they stop asking.
@amy30 sorry that you were made to feel crappy about your tattoo – that tat is beautiful and a reminder of how far you’ve come – not you are embracing life and loving yourself. I don’t have pets but for most their pets are like kids and you do what works best for you fur baby – no one knows or understands your pets the way you would. Hope the rest of your day turned out better – grateful for your coping mechanisms
@mno how did the vet visit go? Hope they were able to treat Luna.
@bear21 Well done on your double digits. Smart to know what works for you and grateful that you were able to escape to the gym. Keep up the great work.
@sabrina80 I would be a hypochondriac too – especially if I was working in the medical field and knowing all that was going on. I am grateful that you are taking care of yourself and not letting your work push you into coming in before you are ready.
@minatasha well done on 2 days of being alcohol free and resisting those urges. Hopefully you have some support irl to help lean on when things get rough. The beginning is hard but knowing the weekend is hard you can prepare for it now. Plan to do something to keep yourself busy. Have non alcoholic drink options available. Go to a meeting? This is a great place to log onto when feeling the urges – it really helps me with my urges. Keep up the strength
@louloubelle Aah that is a tough one. If it is triggering then you definitely can’t have it in the house and I’m not sure how your hubby would feel about drinking the bottle in one sitting cause the only thing worse than having a bottle of wine in the house is having an opened bottle in the house. If you can’t regift immediately – it may need to be chucked. Your sobriety is of utmost importance. I do hope the non-alcoholic treats helped
So beautiful Jules! Loved reading this. You do have a huge welcoming heart
@thumper1213 Well done on your 2 weeks Billy! Keep up the amazing work
@bomdhil Much love Thomas – I do love that you do not get defeated with a slip but come back with even more determination. You are amazing my friend and I see you doing better each day. Keep using the tools you are gathering and I have faith that you will overcome this addiction.
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Thanks Jasmine, it means a lot. My father has a way of getting under my skin… He’s pure petty venom. But I’m here for my mom and I can walk out at any time. I need to keep reminding myself of that.
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I had a very hard time waking up today. I went to bed quite a bit earlier than normal too. Idk. It’s been cooler lately, which helps me sleep better, but makes me achy. People think I’m crazy for liking 90°+ days, but it’s the only time my body doesn’t hurt. One of my original reasons for drinking was to alleviate my back pain. Now I just have to deal with it 
I told my daughter if it was nice today, we’d go to the pool. I really wasn’t feeling it so I told her we’d do something else. She seemed disappointed so I took it back and we went anyways. I’m glad I changed my mind. A little motion made me feel better, as I know it does. Plus, I miss so much of the summer as it is from working, I should enjoy the nice weather when I can.
Feeling a bit overwhelmed, maybe. Maybe that’s not the right feeling. School starts in 2 weeks and we haven’t heard anything. Same thing last year. She didn’t know who her teacher was, or the necessary supplies to buy, until just a week before! Then scrambling to find everything we need at the last moment. Luckily I’m a lifelong procrastinator, so I’ll get it done, but now I’d prefer to be more prepared. Annoying.
Ah well. I’m gonna wind down and try to get some extra sleep. Hope it doesn’t backfire and make me more tired. Goodnight 
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Congratulations CB.
Great job.
Enjoy your trip.
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Day 65
Today was a good day. I made the decision that no one or thing is going to disturb my serenity. I’ve changed my outlook with regard to my job.
Cutting the ex out makes sense. While painful it’s ok. I’ve rid my circle of all others that don’t show up for me like I show up for.
I’m so grateful for all of you. 
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Right on. Congratulations!
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1536
Back to work. And back to my college days, getting up at 3:30 to do some study work -albeit this time as a supervisor of a trainee nurse. Always last minute. Well it’s done. Off I go. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Sober and clean. Love.
Luna update: blood work showed nothing too bad, kidneys and thyroid didn’t get any worse, maybe some pancreas trouble. Borderline.
Vet gave her some fluids, something for her appetite/against nausea, and Buprenorphine which made her wobbly. She ate more this night than she did since Friday so that’s good news. Although it could be better. Thanks for the concern all.
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@catmama23 I’m sorry about your kitty – I do hope that he handles the medicine without side effects and gets better soon. Ok – wtf – that just sounds messed up. I would be taken aback by this interaction as well. You did nothing wrong and (in fact were nice enough to give him space) and I do hope you can brush it off and not let it get to you. You are doing amazing with coming up to your 2 week milestone!
@karenkw you are doing so well with all your sober time – glad that you are able to shoo those cravings. Just think that you will be at the beach soon enough! Adulting is totally overrated.
@thewolf Have a great holiday and enjoy your time with the kids
@moosetracks Great sober time and glad you enjoyed your sober vacation! Way to go with all your hard work on your sobriety journey
@sara.eve grateful that you were able to be there for your friend and in turn help yourself in your recovery. Best of luck with work tomorrow 
@SelfLove_42 well done on shutting down the YouTube and reach out to your friend. So awesome that you are seeing the signs in time and utilizing your tools. So proud of you my friend – keep up the great work.
@goku2019 so sorry my friend – I do hope you get some answers soon and are able to find relief with your health issues
@butterflymoonwoman I’m so sorry love – I do hope you get some answers very soon! I do find the run around to be insane at times and a complete waste of time. I totally empathize with how frustrating this can be. Glad you are relaxing and working on your DBT.
@just_laura Glad you went out to the pool and had a nice summer day. Its ridiculous that the school doesn’t let you know till 1 week prior – don’t they think parents have a busy schedule. I’m sorry for this added stress. Hope you have a well rested evening!
Checking in on Monday night
243 days free of alcohol and weed
658 days free of cigarettes
It was a decent day. I did start doing some spring cleaning (about 4 hrs) in the hopes that doing this will help with reducing all my stuff and hopefully find my US passport in the process 
It was a rough day physically but i am grateful for a good mental day… i did stay positive and was able to 11k steps and a 1/2 hour meditation in today but no other activities. Hope everyone had a wonderful addiction free day / evening - sending you all much love
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Thanks for the support and the warm welcome back
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@icebear it makes total sense. Congrats on 800+ days
@Sissychris39 as someone who is struggling with an eating disorder myself, I recognise your massive achievement, congrats to that and congrats on 750 days no pills too
@Bones_80 glad to see you checking-in, sorry you’ve been so unwell I hope they can get you started on some diabetes meds to get you stabilised ASAP 
@GenG congrats on 50 days
@Juli1 congrats on your week
@Mia2 thank you for understanding 🩵 sorry you can relate though
@Mno thinking of you and Luna I hope the vet was able to help 🩵
@JazzyS thank you friend 🩵 congrats on 8 months AF
@Bear21 congrats on double digits I’m glad you have a healthy habit to help keep you busy.
@Hisharleyquinn1318 congrats on 70 days feel better soon sending strength 🩵
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