Thank you 
It really was! Not taking my health for granted any more!
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Hi everyone I have my own thread titled my last drink and I’m 3 days and a little over 16 hours into my journey and it’s been good so far.
I try to stay busy and so on but out of all days today was a great day no complaints at all but app day I have been craving a drink.
I hate this so much because I know I’m not going to relapse but I can’t stop the cravings. I’m about to work on cleaning my house some more to keep busy but does anyone have any idea on how I can stop these awful cravings and thoughts about wanting a drink?
I’m not going to give in i know it but for some reason today is my hardest day cravings wise……
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Evening Check In
Day 586
I really couldve used the extra rest today but I chose to spend it with my mom. Its her last day here in my city and so I wanted to spend quality time with her. I went for a lovely walk with her and my son thru the huge park behind my building. The fall weather really brightened up all the leaves and made it such a nice walk. We even did a fall photo shoot with my son. So i got some great pictures of him!
My husband came home and then my mom said her goodbyes and she left. I miss her and am grateful for the time I had with her.
My husband secured another tattoo with a coworker so he received the deposit for that. He gave me a couple hundred dollars for spending money which Im so grateful for, but at the same time i was triggered by having that kind of extra cash just on me. I am going to think of what i can spend it on. Maybe hit up a thrift store next week and see what good clothes i can find (I love thrifting). And then maybe I can purchase another virtual Conqueror Challenge for my workouts. Idk. But i did have to talk myself out of that thinking. Had to play the tape to the end and really get real about how my life was 586 days ago.
I am just getting my son to bed now and then I will get ready for work tmrw. Do some self care and get a good rest hopefully. I HAVE to get back to my spirituality. I feel soooo disconnected from my HP and I guarentee thats part of the reason why im having urges to use. My spiritual defenses arent up.
Anyway, i hope u all are doing well. Its sooo nice to see people taking milestones and new people arriving and others coming back. I love this community. Have a goodnight 
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Congratulations on your 2 weeks Jenny.
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Cravings are definitely tough to experience. I think what has helped me in the past in early early days is to find something that satisfies an urge for a treat. A bit of ice cream or candy or cookie. I definitely gave in to the sugar to help get through those early cravings and I am grateful that helped me. Sparkling waters also helped tremendously. I could pop a can of La Croix water and it gave me what I needed in the moment. Breathing exercises helped a lot, too (google box breathing). In the hardest moments I read through the list of reasons I wanted to quit and that gave me the edge I needed. You can do this and I promise it will get easier. 
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Great Job Daniellegurl.
Those first few days/ weeks are a real bitch.
Have you heard of HALT ?
Sometimes we forget what’s really going on like have I eaten. And I tired.
There’s also great thread Brian started on how he uses it. It’s good reading.
Hang in there.
Great job reaching out.
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@sadmemequeen I am happy to hear that you switched up your schedule. I do agree that you will be able to deal with these classes later on when you are feeling better.
@rob11 wow man its great to hear that you are played and enjoyed competition tennis today. 
Ah friend – I’m so sorry how straining your relationship with your mom is. I do hope that you are able to keep up a civil conversation 
@jenny1972 CONGRATS on your 2 weeks! This is amazing
@try2change 2 months is amazing! So grateful for your pristine blood results!
@daniellegurl you are doing so great with your 3+ days of sobriety. I am super proud of your efforts. I am so sorry for the cravings. I know you are keeping busy – this would be my advice to keep the urges at bay. Avoid triggers and possibly do exercises so that you can release endorphins. Stay hydrated. The cravings do lessen as you stack on the days. Stay connected here or on your on line meetings. We got your back friend – keep strong 
@butterflymoonwoman Love that you were able to spend some time with your mom. Also – a fall photo shoot with your son – this is fantastic – I love it so much I am with you on needed to reconnect with our spiritual side. So true that our connections with our HP is what is needed to keep strong and avoid the temptations. We can and will do this love!
Checking in on Friday morning
275 days free of alcohol and weed
690 days free of cigarettes
I am grateful for a great day. I was able to get a lot of small work done and even managed an impromptu short walk. I do have some tests next week so hoping for some indication on what is causing my inflammation.
Ready for a restful night. Sweet dreams my beautiful friends. Sending you all so much love
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Day 97 alcohol free
What a week. Today I’m particular I thought would never end. It just drug on and on.
House sitting for friends and I had such an urge to drink. This particular friend had alcohol everywhere. Beer, ciders, wine and hard alcohol. For the first time in awhile I started reasoning with myself that I could certainly have a glass of wine. No one would know. I could have a drink and it would be ok. What in the world.
This particular friend kind of mocked me as she walked out the door about helping myself to Amy if the wine. I told her I wasn’t drinking and she kinda said I heard. Not sure what that meant. I don’t know if that planted the seed it what. I’m glad I did not and that I was able to distract myself by reaching out to another friend.
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Emotional day 4:
Today has been draining, packing day for my girlfriend. The yin and yang of emotions was powerful throughout the day, but the emotions were needed and made for a pretty good day together.
We got her car packed fairly efficiently, went to the store to buy food for dinner. I grilled porkchops and made mashed cauliflower, dinner was great. Then we went outside to enjoy the cool, early fall night.
This is when the sadness took over. We were sitting around our firepit, a place we love, and the emotions took over, much heavier than i thought they would be. We came inside and i put her in bed. I had to come down to the couch because if i stayed there she wouldn’t have stopped crying, not sure i would have either.
She leaves at 6:00 am.
Emotional day, still sober and so happy I’ve been sober to spend these last two days with her.
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Proud of you for keeping your control in that situation 
The last time I had thoughts like that, ‘it’s just one drink’, I fell off for 3 years. Please trust me when I say, that ‘one’ drink will never be worth it. Keep it up lady 
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59 days no binge drinking. I’m ok. Hope you are too.
It’s a state of mind, the urge. It’s habit, maybe some physical things that will draw us to the drink or drug, particularly in the early days where the body depends on a particular thing it’s used to but once you flush it out of your system and the body adjusts it’s then a mental draw to the addiction. We need to balance out bodies and brain chemistry to function without it then battle with the mind to convince ourselves that it’s not needed. Simple really, but in practice as we all know it’s not so straight forward.
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Ugh! Been a long week physically. And still have one more workday to go 
Wednesday felt like a Friday but here we are again. Not terribly busy but my feet hurt. Training another new girl. Idk why tf they’re still hiring new people. The season is over and soon we’ll only be open 4 days a week. At least I know I’ll get hours.
Other than that, pretty boring day. Quiet night alone. Sure I’ll be getting some good sleep tonight. Hope the same for you all 
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Congratulations @HoofHearted on the 5 Years! Awesome! You’ve helped so many on your journey.
Sorry about the news about your wife’s job. Hoping that all will be well in the end.
Thinking about you on both. Fingers crossed for good outcome.
Celebrate your 5 year achievement… it’s wonderful!
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Checking in, feeling love, be loved, loving and more love in a big fat field.
No cravings, no using, no suffering.
Enjoy your weekend,
do yourself something good today
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Checking in, Day 9. It is a beautiful day out there and the weekend so feeling very relaxed. I have a little more energy too.
I did not sleep that well. Was woken at 4am by my husband coming home from a rare night out. Then of course the serious snoring. Drunk people are annoying 
I just lay there so grateful to be sober. And now, waking up completely sober. I don’t ever want to go back to that. Luckily this is a rare occasion for my husband so I probably won’t deal with this again for months.
I hope everyone has a lovely, sober day.
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Day 252.
Greetings from nervous breakdown land!
Actually, today I’m feeling a bit better. I was up working until 1 am (fun times), but went to sleep without setting any alarms.
Next week is gonna be the most challenging in my beaurocratic journey. But for now, I really gotta focus on getting my work done. Whatever happens. Happens.
On the bright side, I worked out the numbers and next month I should have enough for a new phone. I haven’t had a new phone in nearly 4 years. So that’s exciting.
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Still sober…n haven’t used
Tomorrow makes 2wks
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Had eleven days, beautiful Sober days…now on day one again. Checking in.
I was all good and actually a few things happened (no excuses) the car literally broke and wouldn’t start, so I missed yoga and missed a Friday night gym workout… my partner mentioned wine several times and so did a neighbour who joined us staring into the open bonnet of the car. Like, oh well; get a glass of wine, it’s Friday.
I think my subconscious self had already give in a few hours earlier at the first mention of it. So going down the high street to the garage to get a micro fuse led to supermarket stop…
Both me and the car still broken.
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Day 1008,
Overthinking , thinking, slept out, still in bed. Late evening sporting and release from treatment kept me awake.
Negative thinking seems to be my nature 
. Self pity that I had to go to such a centre etc. Now trying to focus on the positive. Without going there I wouldn’t have known that the adhd is at the centre of things. A total chaotic and impulsive life in which the booze took the role of self-medication. Very vulnerable for trauma. My trauma’s are still there but I see things a tiny bit brighter. It’s gonna be hard work. I just have to figure out what the role of AA/NA is in all of this. From others I know it’s tricky to work the steps with a lot of trauma. I have that experience so far, it really pushes me in if we discuss the steps so far. My sponsor only doesn’t seem to listen when I express my concerns about it. And just keeps coming back with one liners. Just work the steps etc. Triggering my never feeling heard button. I feel the need to set my boundary there. Any suggestions or experience on this are welcome.
Greetz
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