Hope your coffee and walk turns out nice 
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Congratulations. So happy for you. Your doing amazing. God is awesome! Keep at it!
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Day 19.
Feeling at peace. Ready for all the good that is too come from me doing the next right thing. Moving my children and I into a different dimension. Staying away from people, places and things that arenāt good for us. Hope everyone had a happy sober 24.
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day 578 of no self harm
my parents got back yesterday. today Iām struggling with pretty much everything. I had a really triggering nightmare that has made me relive past experiences, I canāt stop obsessing about my eating and while Iām not acting on it, keep thinking about ways to restrict my food intake. decided I should go with my mom when she went to the grocery store. thought it would help to get out the house. the store was too crowded and just made me anxious and now Iām on the way home exhausted. I havenāt showered in well over a week, I was planning to shower tonight but now I donāt know if I care anymore.
on Wednesday my friend is going to come over and help my clean my room. I am looking forward to it but Iām also dreading them seeing how I actually live. Iām going to do a pre clean before then to try to lessen my anxiety about it.
just trying to take it minutes by minute today
update: took a shower, feel awful physically but now itās done at least
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Hey. I just showered for the first time in 4 days. You arenāt alone here. This morning I was reading articles about the link between hygiene and mental health because I have been lacking in motivation and all my happy chemicals lately.
Screw the stigma. You are heard. 
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thank you
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@Sabrina80 Congratulations 
on one year being free!
@Olivia 3 years! You are working your sobriety so hard, you deserve it!
@Deelzebub Sending strength and comfort.
@BrOKenWolf We are all have our flaws and difficulties. Here to listen when you are ready.
@Chosen2001 Great job! 
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Checking in on day 98, I finally had a day off today which felt absolutely incredible. Got to sleep in for the first time in what feels like forever!
Hope you all had a good Sunday! 
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Hey friends
Checking in with 551 days. All is well here, had a few slips with my self care, taking on too many things at once with work and the kids and not taking time for myself to recharge. But Iāve taken the full weekend to take care, take time to be present, fill my cup back up.
I hope you all have a wonderful day 
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@Timetochange 99 daysā¦this is impressive. Iām sorry you are dealing with self confidence. Start practicing positive self affirmations and be kind to yourself. Seems you want to find a version of yourself - talk with your wifeā¦ change is possible if you want it and with support.
@CATMANCAM I do hope that you have a good visit with your friend tomorrow. Well done on setting and keeping your boundary. I do hope itās a lovely day for the both of you
@Chosen2001 way to go Chris! 4 months is awesome 
Wow Desā¦so excited for your new adventure.
@SadMemeQueen Iām sorry Megan. I do understand feeling overwhelmed at the grocery store. I myself avoid weekends and prime shopping time for the same reason. I do hope you are able to do some deep breathing exercises or talk with someone to calm your anxiety. We are here if you want to talk with us.
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Congratulations on 4 years, awesome accomplishment!
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4 years is amazing
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Happy Sunday everyone 
Happy to be alive and sober. So happy for that. Not just sober but you know that obsessive state of mind? Yes that is not there. If you are in that, trying to stay sober through thatā¦it DOES go away. It does, it will go just hang in there.
I started typing that earlier and now Im back. My son has nught terrorsā¦I didnt know what they looked like until now, and it is so very unsettling. My son cries and cries and strains and screams, and he seems to me oike hes in pain and wont look at us and doesnt want to be touched. They are not usually too long, but the scrwaming is so bad that I cannot leave him alone and he strains and thrashes around. I know they say to not disurb or try to wake them, so we try to wait it out but it is very diffixult. When he strains his body like that it reminds me more of a seizure, though I can see that isnt what it isā¦he is just so angry, and I am trying npt to internalize tjis little night terror but man it is very hard.
Overall greatweekend & tired now. Sitting here with my boy as hes finally calm. Hope everyoje had a decent weekend xo happy 24.
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Checking in at day 106 alcohol free
Itās been a quiet weekend just what I needed. A bit concerned. My birthday is coming up on Friday and Iām going to my friendās house for a small birthday party weekend. While there will be people there drinking my friend and hostess is sober. What Iām concerned about is Iāve been a bit obsessed with finding non alcoholic wine and cocktails. It sounds harmless but is that a step in the wrong direction? Amy insight and perspective would be helpful.
Did not get the cleaning and purging I wanted to do fine but it was a nice weekend.
Iām grateful to be sober, and Iām grateful for this supportive community. Sleep well everyone
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Checking in
14 months no booze today
44 days no tobacco
Goodnight
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1577
Second day back at work coming up. Good I started with a Sunday shift which always is relatively easy and quiet. I was still knackered afterwards, and in bed at 9 pm. Not totally rested now but itāll have to me make do. Iām sober and clean. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Love from Amsterdam.
@DanaM56 For many people it is a step in the wrong direction as it can be triggering. I do have a n/a beer (and make sure itās truly n/a) every once in a blue Monday for a special occasion, but itās very rare. Being obsessed over it doesnāt sound healthy to me. Take care.
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End of Day 13:
Kind of an obscure day, not the Sunday I was expecting. After having a pretty great day yesterday I was sooo looking forward to some solid sleep. My mind and body had a different plan. Only managed 4 hours, but got up made breakfast for my kids, we talked for quite a while and I felt pretty good.
They left around 1:00, I did some laundry while watching football and then the emotional pendulum switched. Suddenly started feeling anxious and pretty down. I know itās because I was tired and lonely, which is odd because I normally enjoy being alone, but today was different. I knew it would pass, but hated feeling that way.
I kept busy around the house, spent a lot of time on TS, ate spoonfuls of peanut butter and jam (best part of my afternoon) and just let the negative feelings work their way through.
Not the best day, but a sober day. Felt good that the thought of drinking was never an option, just not the Sunday I was hoping for.
Tomorrow will be a better day, itās my birthday, and somehow Iām the one making dinner for my family. 
. My kids, my mom and my sister are coming over. It will be good to have them around. I actually prefer hosting the get togethers as I get to stay in my own house and donāt have to drive anywhere.
Grateful to be sober!
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Early morning on day 366
Seems that I had problems with the food from yesterday evening 
I was more often sitting on the toilet than laying in my bed.
I hope everything is out now lol.
Today is something we call āBrĆ¼ckentagā. When monday is a regular day but tuesday is a holiday many employees take that monday off.
Then everything is calm in the morning, less cars and less people in busses and trains. I love that.
On the negative side there will be many people in the grocery stores this evening because of the holiday 
Me included because I was too sick on saturdayā¦yay 
Okay, lets conquer this day peeps.
Have a beautiful sober day friends, stay strong 
@DanaM56 for me it was the wrong decision. The last time when I got sober I had n/a beer very often and Iām sure it made the transition from n/a to alcoholic drinks easier in the end. At least for me. There is lots and lots of delicious stuff you can sip on, try it 
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