Hey all, checking in on day 1264. I hope everybody had a good one!
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Today I booked an appointment regarding my liver as it is not functioning well according to some routine labs ordered from my PCP. A bit worried about the consultation with GI about next steps. Good news is Iām not in liver failure. Bad news is staeotosis. ā¦ The results also showed sparing liver. Id like to hear someoneās definition of sparing liver bc I researched a little and all I get are scholarly articles with terms way out of my vocabulary! 
If u have experience with sparing liver or know more about it than I do, comment plz 
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Day 111*
I think Iām happy. I remember the lows I had in my twenties so vividly. I was sure that no amount of supports, therapy, friendships, fulfilling employment, or anything would bring me to a place of contentment. Trauma and grief just felt way too deep and overwhelming to be able to move through and live an independent life. I donāt know. Even with some steps backwards in the healing process everything is so different today. The last five years have given so much change to my life - things I was convinced would never change about myself. Iām grateful suicide attempts were unsuccessful. Iām grateful I kept trying. Everything feels really impermanent and that feels wonderful.
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Thank you Menno, but not my birthday! 
Just the same age as mom had 
But happy still 
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Day 1,266 clean and sober today. Really enjoying the time off work. Taking time to recharge and care for myself is essential to my recovery. Super proud of everyone here, love you guys 
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Day 76 and all is well except hubby and me both sick. Not too bad, though. At least itās not COVID!
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Crazy 80 days sober
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Working my way through day 19 and although my mood isnāt the best and Iām still feeling easily agitated at times, Iām sober and plan to stay that way for today. I am very triggered by behaviors of those closest too me but I need to understand thatās that addict voice trying to give me an excuse to use. I know there is no excuse. Wasting money on my DOC will only bring me down. Iāll just try to keep my head up and remember negative emotions donāt last and I have the tools to help shift my thinking. Have a theatrical Thursday wonderful people!!! Happy Friyay Eve! 
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Like @hidden, I was also born in the LDS church, though I am not associated now. Depending on the area of worship (called a āwardā) you attend, it can be a good way to be involved with a fairly wholesome community (as churches are fundamentally made up of humans and the humans can make or break any experience), as the LDS church is very family/community focused.
There is a tendency to ālove bombā people looking into the church, but I donāt generally think it is malicious. Like all churches, imo, they do hold some incorrect beliefs, especially about many events in the churchās early past, and I would definitely suggest taking any conversion slowly, but I also wouldnāt tell you not to check it out.
The young LDS missionaries are basically āsales peopleā for the church, and generally not equipped to answer many contrarian questions about their history (which I would definitely suggest investigating from different angles yourself), so Iād also say to decline engaging in anything you donāt feel comfortable withāsuch as you being the one to prayāas these are āemotional sales tacticsā, though obviously they would genuinely not believe this to be the case. If nothing else, it could be a nice experience for you to simply go to services and other events to meet new people and see if you like the feeling of community they provide.
If it is useful to you in your recovery, then do it. I agree with @JazzyS that the fundamentals of all churches tend to be very similar. Itās just the packaging around very core concepts that are different.
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Day 119 (3 setbacks)
Just checking in. Been resisting donuts for 8 to 10 months of dieting, start my 6 month journey again 12/1, so today, i had a donut to start the day, OMG so good. My kid won student of the month so there is a ceremony iām attending which is awesome. Doing alot of self work lately, focused on avoiding instant gratification and learning to be more humble. I gotta do the work if i want to get where i want to go, whether that be weight loss or my sobriety. Have a good day all!
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Perfect mantra for the day, thanks!!!
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Iām on day 141, and Iām gonna do some work.
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Day 1076,
Quiting the meds for now, having a call on Monday to see how to proceed. It is quit a drawback, but picking myself up a bit.
Greetz
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Thank you for checking on me 
My body aches are better so Iām very thankful about that. I canāt even explain how bad my entire body was hurting. My fever finally broke under 100. 99.6 last I checked. I still have a headache and my brain feel fuzzy. My throat still hurts and I have very little appetite. Iām forcing food down with my medicine. I went to the doctor yesterday and they tested me. I have covid 
They gave me an antiviral and Iām taking tylenol cold and flu. My doctor gave me a note so I donāt have to go back to work until tomorrow.
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Glad to hear youāre feeling a bit better then. Hope you feel good enough to work tomorrow.
Take it easy! 
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Yes, you are a bad ass Mischa
Congratulations on your 5 months sober.
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Congratulations on your 5 months! Thatās huge!
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Hi, Iām Julia Iāve been cutting for 8 years. BUT, today is day 2 clean! YAY! Just struggling due to other addictions from family members affecting the rest of us. It opens my eyes to see how I affect them with my addiction. Another family member and I were up all night into the morning bc the 3rd member of the family was using and just destroyed the place (with a mess not actually destroying property). Everyone is perfectly safe and thereās no risk of anyone being emotionally or physically hurt by him while he is in that state. Itās just afterwards that we all pay the price and itās really hard for me not to pick up a sharp. Even without that going on Iāve been tempted. Iām in a really vulnerable place rn bc Iām extremely new off a 5 month hospitalization out for a month then in for another 5. itās been a year of hell. But thereās hope because I have trust in God and his ability to heal and guide me through recovery. Iām overcoming skeletons in my closet, things that I donāt share too much but this app is really helping so far! Thanks for letting me share!
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Iām late on reading this but have felt this way a lot in my life. I saw a Facebook memory of a post I made where I asked people to say one thing they think of when they think of me. I read through it again and it surprised the hell out of me. Surprised me at the time, too, but itās amazing what we forget when time passes. Just want to say that sometimes our beliefs about ourselves can be wrong. Sometimes we have these feelings about what kind of person we are and other people donāt feel that way or itās more nuanced than we think. We all have our nuances and our traits but I think we are our own worst critics, too. 
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