Congratulations on ur 5 months!!!
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Boss being accommodating and supportive of your recoveryā¦ Sounds like a great place to be. Congratulations on your new position
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Day 82*
Feeling really detached from my thoughts and my body lately. Iām starting to bring up more significant topics in therapy so Iām assuming itās related. In bed at 6pm reading and snuggling with the pup, weirdly smelling her paws brings me a lot of comfort. Leaning in to the little joys this week.
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day 609 of no self harm
fuck today. barely slept.
found out my grandpa on my dadās side (not the one Iām close with) has colon cancer. my grandma told us it was stage 4 and it had spread but then said she misunderstood and it was not stage 4 and it has not spread but she isnāt telling us anything about treatment options.
Iām in the process of trying to get diagnosed with autism. the first neuropsych I was referred to refused me with no explanation, the second one I was referrred to I just got paperwork that says they wonāt assess for autism if Iām over 18
I need a CPAP because I have sleep apnea and my oxygen drops into the 80s at night. been without it for months because my mask broke. everytime I place an order it gets voided. I called my insurance they said they donāt even see orders so now I have to have my doctor contact them. it took 8 months to get the results of my blood work. so yeah Iām gonna be not sleeping a lot longer. I see my doc on the 15th so hopefully being in person speeds things up.
I just want to be done trying. Iāve spent the last couple nights crying. it feels like nothing helps
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Hello Yaāll 
I am on day 32 of recovery and that is going very well.
I am on day 2 of my āRoad Tripā ā¦ and Iāma a gonna lose my shit!
The girlfriend runs a daycare out of her home and I am surrounwd by very noisy, busy ālittlesā , 9 of the wee shits today and I am on my last nerve!
Did I mention I am not ākid experiencedā? 
She said she would arrange her schedule to have some visiting time but thatās not happening, which I get. My anxiety is getting worse and I keep retreating to my room to have naps to get away from the little beasties.
I kinda want to leave tomorrow but donāt want to hurt her feelings but my nerves are SHOT!
What do I do?
Signed ā¦ This isnāt fun anymore 
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Can you try a day trip out by yourself at all?
It doesnāt sound like my cup of tea either to be honest. 
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Day 291.
Just checking in. Sober.
Iām so tired and depressed itās getting on my nerves. My carpal tunnel is particularly bad right now too, so Iām also in a lot of pain. Iām actually looking forward to doing the washing up these days because it gives me relief from the pain.
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Here I am, doing good. Busy day today, just now finding time to check in, do my journaling and read some posts. Being busy is a good thing I guess. Hope everyone is staying strong and sober. I am!
Kim d18
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Day 3 sober.
Had a good appointment with my therapist today. But battled a migraine all morning triggered by dentist yesterday.
Exhausted.
OFDAAT
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@Amy30 Sorry to see you are struggling. I pray you have some strength and endurance in this trial. You are in very good numbers
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Congrats on your five months of sobriety 
great achievement.
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I hate to see you in pain, Iāll save all my washing up for you too. Honestly itās the least I can do, congrats on your sober days BTW
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@lorelai and @Bomdhil thank you both so much. Being able to vent on here helps tenfold. Not sure about my depression, but carpal tunnel flare-ups tend to subdue within a few days.
@Dolse71 that made me laugh more than it should! Thank you, Paul.
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Oh dear, that doesnāt sound funny at all @Chuckie22
You should be honest with your friend and tell her that it is all too much for you. I guess she would understand. And at the end of the day again it is about setting boundaries as well. You have to take care of yourself Charlie, so if you feel like leaving than you better leave.
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Day 130 had a call at 3.25 to say my dad had a heart attack, so just driven 374 miles to my parents. He has had surgery, so I will be able to see him tomoro
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Wishing for a speedy recovery for you dad. Have a safe trip there and back.
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Thanksā¦ Hopefully all OK. Heās had a big heart attack and three stents put in but he is pretty solid. Will get some sleep now Iām here, do some work first thing then take everyone to the hospital
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Thank you for your support. I did go to a meeting yesterday afternoon and again this morning. Not sure why but felt very vulnerable and extremely emotional at the meetings. Any way yes i wanted to throw out the remaining liquor but funny thing (not) it took me all day to find it. I hid it but for the life of me couldnāt remember where i hid it. But i finally did and threw it out. Feeling a bit better this evening.
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