Checking in daily to maintain focus #60

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Day 46:

Up at 5:30 and my work phone was already crazy. Hectic morning at work that continued the entire day. Last job finished at 7:00 tonight and I am done. Thankfully I have the house to myself tonight. Got day 3 of the November workout challenge done, not hard yet, but it feels good to be committed to something besides work. No thoughts or fantasies of drinking, just fantasizing of my bed and sleep.

State volleyball finals for my daughter start tomorrow at 10:00. Excited to see her play, but a little apprehension as this could be the last time I see her play volleyball, competitively. This old man will definitely get her out for some sand volleyball this summer, always fun playing with her.

Time to decompress from the day and get some sleep, god willing! Praying for an insomnia free night!

[Butterflymoonwoman]

Checking In
Day 628
Today was a pretty good day, but i definitly over caffiinated myself… resulting in a massive migraine. I really need to back off the caffeine a bit I think. Got my nails done and they look nice! It felt soo good to get them professionally done for a change. They even massaged my hands and forearms with a hot stone and lotion. It was very cool! Spent the afternoon playing with my son which was nice. Had a relaxing hot shower. Now just getting ready for work tmrw. Not much else to report this evening. Grateful for my recovery Have a good night everyone!

[happyfeet]

Hi @Charlie_C , it’s great having you here.
Congratulations on 1084 sober days! I’m sorry to hear you’re not feeling strong lately. Your post though sounds like you’re still strong in your sobriety. Can you find out what’s missing in your life at the moment? Like @JazzyS said maybe it is time to start something knew?
A new hobby? Yoga? Meditation? Cooking class?
I’ve been getting this kind of blah time again and again but started to realise that in my case it has a lot to do with exhaustion. When I lose the track I try to refocus on self-care, try to sleep, eat well and go for long walks.
This is what helps me.
Hope you feel better soon Charlie. You’re strong!
Have nice and fulfilling sober weekend

[Cjp]

Thank you so much for sharing @Charlie_C you remind me that just because we are sober doesnt mean everyday is going to be that pink cloud. I wish you something better than blah in the near future

[Kareness]

I’ve been asked to lead two meetings over the next week! I’m not feeling particularly strong - more like in survival mode than thriving. Not sure what these two meeting topics will be. But I hear you should always say yes to service…

[TheWolf]

Day 181. Good morning everybody. Ive been awake since 5am and cannot get back to sleep. I know if I don’t get another hour I will pay for it later! I’m thinking about getting up and starting my day though

[CATMANCAM]

@JennyH thank you 🩵 and congrats on 50 days totally with you on the slacking due to dark and rainy evenings, I havent been doing my walk for a couple weeks now, need to get back out there!
@Tragicfarinelli thank you 🩵 enjoy your trip
@GC1111 congrats on 2 weeks
@2JTravNZ congrats on the pass
@Deelzebub love the sculpture
@Brian1965uk oh nooo, feel better soon 🩵
@Charlie_C good to see you checking-in sending strength 🩵

1180 days no alcohol.
645 days no cocaine.
160 days no vape.

Checking in for yesterday, fell asleep with 20 posts left to catch-up on, so close!..

Yesterday was frustrating. I woke up and all of my symptoms were back, so I waited for my GP surgery to open and called to schedule a call-back. A nurse called and asked me to drop a sample in, which is fine but because I am out-of-area, it’s a 30min drive each way. If I didn’t have so many referrals pending I’d be for sure registering with the surgery where I live, but the last thing I need is for any of my referrals to get messed up. Anyway, the results will be back on Monday hopefully, so I wait to see what shows up. In the meantime I will take my last anti-biotic this morning, then start my prophylaxis ones again this evening.

Then I emailed the admin team at my GP surgery, asking quite simply, to know when my referral for an ADHD assessment was made. It was a few years ago now but I haven’t heard anything from anyone about it, and I’ve recently found out I can opt to go to a private clinic, that only has an 8 month wait, as opposed to 4 years, but I am trying to find out when my original referral was made to see if it’s worth persuing that, but they just kept coming back to me with irrelevant information that I hadn’t asked for, that doesn’t even relate to my ADHD referral. Gah!

Anyway that’s my update for yesterday. It was not worth drinking, using, or binge-eating over, and instead, I meditated, then watched a movie for the first time in over a year, without eating.

Wishing you all wonderful sober weekends.

🩵

[Just_Laura]

261

Pretty good day. Work was fine. I went to a friends after to watch MMA. I couldn’t even tell ya if they were drinking or not. I wasn’t paying attention to that possibility. I think I saw a beer can? It’s so weird, not thinking about it. Looking back now I realize that was all I thought about, everyday.

“Ugh, I feel like shit, I can’t wait until I leave the house so I can feel better. Did I buy enough for the night? I’m only going to drink 6…. Gotta go out of my way to buy more so the first store doesn’t see me coming back. Time to leave for work so you’ll have time to go to the store before, then make sure you’re out by 9:55 to make it to the other one before they close (I did it like that bc if I bought a larger quantity it would be gone before I left work, and be driving home blacked out). I need to use the bathroom (so I could drink a few shooters in secret if there was no where else to hide). Is where I’m headed going to have alcohol? If so, I should still grab a few shooters. If not, bring my own and if I run out I’ll make an excuse to leave.” Except that one time, July 4th 2020, I had absolutely no reason whatsoever to leave and come back so…I drank mouthwash You know it’s like 40 proof? And you’ll never feel sicker! It’s the only time in my life I’ve ever woken up puking.

Look at that That is fucking insanity! Praise God He had to have something to do with it. I can’t explain it otherwise. However it happened, I am beyond grateful this compulsion has been removed. I feel free.

Dang, it’s late I gotta work in the morning. I am really looking forward to that extra hour tomorrow. I hope you all have an amazing sober day. Congratulations to everyone on their impressive numbers! I’m proud of everyone of you that’s here​:+1:To those of you that are struggling - stay the course. Life is easier without your DOC. It will get better

[Timetochange]

Day 133. Woke up at 5.30am which is much better… May go into Liverpool today . Other folks visiting my dad today. I think he may be discharged Sunday or Monday? Then I can drive back home to Cornwall? Cold and wet here. Made some buttered toast. Really appreciate the support this week. I am so amazed about modern heart surgery. So incredible

[Juli1]

64 days AF

I found out some hard pattern about my difficult relationships (and somehow love addiction) yesterday. There is realy still some work to be done. With mysef.

[Mno]

1610

Glad to be out of bed early today. Also glad I seemed to have found a way of journaling that works for me. It’s a good start of the day, before doing anything else. Coffee, journal and SAD lamp makes for a good routine. Only thing that needs (no need really, but it’d be nice) improvement is a true left handed journal instead of using a right handed one from the back to the front. haven’t found that yet.

Another wet windy day ahead. It’s supposed to be dry until noon or so, so I better make the best of the morning. Get out grocery shopping. Tonight I have a party to attend, my cousin’s turning 50 and celebrating big time. Might be fun. Haven’t been to a party like that for a few years.

I don’t see any problems ahead to retain my sobriety. When it’s no fun I’ll just leave. In the past I drank at parties to make being there bearable I guess. I’ve changed through sobriety and therapy. Let’s see how much tonight . Have as good a day as you all can friends. Sober and clean. Love.

[JennyH]

Day 51 here. The weather is grim I am sitting here hoping my daughter’s football match gets called off after the pitch inspection. It would be really nice if they could do it before I get out of bed too! I am not a fair weather supporter, but it will be miserable for the girls playing on waterlogged pitches in the current rain, and standing watching for 90 minutes in these conditions! Doing that weird shuffle as you lose feeling in your toes

I am feeling a lot better today, thank you for listening and supporting yesterday. Just one of those things I had to get through and sleep on.

Have a good day everyone

Update, game is off, phew!

[PinkyP]

Hi, glad to hear he’s doing well and going home soon. Buttered toast sounds good. Enjoy Lpool

[Alycia]

Hey friends, alive and kicking with 584 days sober.
Just wanted to check in and say hello

[Amy30]

Day 294.

My brain is whirlwind of mixed thoughts and emotions. I’ve been so up and down these past few weeks that I feel exhausted.

I’m worried about the trip to the UK. Some (almost all) of my finest blackout disasters happened there. I’m worried about relapsing. I won’t. But I’m worried I might, if that makes sense?

To prepare, I’ve already asked my husband to talk to his family and tell them not to offer me wine (we have this thing where he deals with his family, I deal with mine, helps prevent any family dramas and misunderstandings- it works for us). My father in law is the sweetest, he already bought different cordials and sparkly water for me.

The friend I am seeing there is pregnant, so there’s no risk I’ll wanna drink with her.

It should be fine. It will be fine. But there’s still a niggle of worry I’ll fuck all this progress up and be back to that dreaded hangxiety.

[Nordique]

Hey all, checking in on day 1238. I hope everybody has a good one!

[zzz]

Makes a very good point here

The evidence we are living in a Simulation is everywhere. All you have to do is look.

[Barber508]

Day 55 and still sober

[JazzyS]

Many healing vibes your way my friend. I am sorry you are struggling with your symptoms. I do hope the change in meds provides some relief. Hopefully you will get some direction and insight from your test results.

Super frustrating to not be able to get straight answers regarding your referral. 4 Years of waiting is insane. Wishing you luck with getting answers and hopefully being able to get this treatment sooner.

@CATMANCAM

meditated, then watched a movie for the first time in over a year, without eating.

This is awesome Cam! Should be proud

Much love dear friend…hope you have a wonderful pain free day

[Timetochange]