@JazzyS so proud you did not drink and that you realized the bigger picture.
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Thanks Dana - I am also very relieved to not have awoken today to regret!
Much love - hope you are enjoying your time away and wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving.
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Omg girl. I am soooo thankful that u didnt drink. Ur day sounded frustrating, overwhelming, and very emotional. Im glad ur getting another drs opinion on this surgery. That sounds like very drastic measures to remove a cyst. Idk. I hope ur having a better day today. Stay strong during the holidays my friend. We are here for u 
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Doing good.
Not wanting to use at all.
I havenāt in a while now.
Sometimes the social lubricant helpsā¦ but at the end of it all, itās never worth it, at least for me.
Hope everyone has a great Holiday, with very minimal stresses, if any.
^.^
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Welcome to the forum! 
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Thank you so much!
This helps me feel less alone, and I really needed something like this!
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I agree! This is my biggest form of support when it comes to my addiction. I couldnt have got to where i am without it honestly 
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I just heard that term used yesterday in my meeting. welcome to the TS community
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Day 418 alcohol free
Day 39 social media detox
Today was the appointment with my Dr to discuss my situation.
He wanted me to first start psychotherapy and then, maybe, medication.
But here you have to wait very long for such a therapy, sometimes one year and more. And I wouldnāt be able to function in any way for so long. So I insisted to start medication right now, to not loose more time. Usually Iām not like this, usually I first want to try alternatives.
I now get a very low dose of Citalopram. Itāll take some weeks until I feel if itās working for me or not.
Next week I have to go to my Dr again because my blood pressure is too high and he also wants to be sure that my labs are good. Iāll get a monitor that checks my blood pressure for 24 hours, this will be fun and Iāll get bruises from it, but itās necessary. Maybe, if the Citalopram works, my blood pressure will go down because the permanent tension will be gone.
I hate getting blood taken, that triggers my fear more. But I know, itās only fear. Nothing bad will happen.
Who knows, but maybe this is a first big step into the right direction? To a life where I donāt feel the need to numb myself because I was able to cure the roots that cause the problems.
Have a beautiful sober day friends, stay strong 
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Grateful you dotched that bullet 
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I just made the decision to start today with setraline, from the same family. I feel relieved already that I started it. Psychotherapy doesnāt do it all and my doctor said it might make therapy easier to cope with. So from my perspective it feels like a big step in the right direction, I hope youāll feel it too
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You make me smile! You are a steady flow of good-ness. Love to youā¤
Btw I keep forgetting what a mind-blowing wonder our existence is.
We are highly complex beings that experience the world deeply through our five senses and biggie brains. We are bodies that can move freely through space and literally do what we want. Honestly letās dream our wildest dreams and go for it. We deserve to build ourselves a life that we love. Yes, love!!! Literally that is possible. Itās all possible, I know this and my source is Eminem
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Minutes after telling my Dr whatās wrong and that I want to start medication I could feel how a huge weight fell off of me.
Since months Iām suffering and I tried everything thatās on the market that could calm me down. I made tests (online) and for a short time I really felt better bc I thought I found my holy grail.
I feel relieved too 
I hope that your meds help you as fast as possible
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Awww Jasmine, I am so sorry you have to go through all that shitty stuff. And I totally agree on having a second opinion on your surgery. But let me tell you that I had my right ovar removed over 30 years ago when I was only 21 years old. I had a ruptured cyst wich was bleeding inside me so they didnāt have another chance but removing it. It was a shock when I woke up after narcotics and left me very sad. But only 2 years later I was having my first son and 3 years later my second one ( wich wasnāt actually my plan by that time 
) So I never ever struggled with my missing ovar actually, all those hormones stuff and things like that it never really had an impact on my wellbeing. So I really hope youāll find another solution for your problem but if not I hope you find a doctor you can trust and whoās caring for your best.
Stay strong my dear! Wine would never be a solution. Get rid of it asap.
Have a lovely sober Thanksgiving @JazzyS
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Checking in 604 days 
Thereās been a heatwave here this week, I love this weather.
Iāve had a challenging week, I had to take some time off work as I try taper down on some medication. And yesterday was a challenge. I have two older sisters trying to reach out to me over the Christmas period to reconnect but I have cut them out of my life for a reason.
Itās hard because I want nothing more than to have my family together, but they have hurt me so many times in the past, and their constant bad behaviour has forced me to completely cut contact with them. I still have so much anger towards them, and what they have done over the years, itās really hard to move forward when they keep trying to come back into my life. It stirs up all these feelings, it feels unresolved but there is no resolution with them, only conflict and fighting and hurt.
I stood my ground yesterday to protect myself but it still feels bad. Iāve been trying to keep up with enjoying outside walks, gentle swims, crocheting to stay calm and look after my mind.
I struggle with taking time to care for myself, it wracks me with guilt sometimes. But I have to do it, no one else is going to look after me, I am responsible for my own health!
Take care friends, happy Friday 
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.
Day 200. Feeling proud 
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Hey Jazzy,
So glad you came and shared how you were feeling and decided to put safety plans in place. Prayers that you find the right Doctor and that all will be well with your health 
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