Their judgment probably has nothing to do with you. They likely had been hurt by someone else, or more likely, many somebody elses, and you happen to be a target of their resentment. Let it be their resentment, not yours.
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Thatās the reason we need each other right. The reason us addicts are in this together. A main one anyway. Normies (as in normal in this aspect of their lives) just donāt get it. They have no idea what Recovery is. They donāt know what we do or who and what we are, us recovering addicts.
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Iām sorry youāre dealing with that buddy, that obviously wasnāt a fair thing for that person to say/do. It sounds like you are handling it alot more gracefully than I would.
Iām with @mx_elle 
lol
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Oh bro you have every right to sit in that shit for a moment. Sending you love & know Im punching at the air for you.
Finding our way through resentments is a true skill, but not being effected by shit like that. You know, I feel like its not a bad thing. Your blood is pumping, you are human & we dont need to be Saintly. āAddictsā are worth fighting for XO.
Edit: also love that you shared that moment bc many of us deal with that and its hard af. Xo.
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Its SO good to see u back!!!
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Thanks @Mira_D and @Lotusflower I appreciate youāre guys words. Today is day 13 and I canāt lie, I didnāt make it to group. I again slept all day, and I think part of it is from depression, all I know is definitely canāt do this tomorrow for my interview. I am about to go hit the gym with my buddy though and Iām sticking to that for sure. I hope everyone is having a good day much love
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Day 730
Just be advised there may be triggers in this post so please skip if you are not in a position to be ok!
Thatās right - 2 years today - probably the hardest 2 years of my life and the not drinking was one of the easiest parts.
When I look back over the last 2 years and think of the loved ones I lost it saddens me that they never got to see me at this point.
I quit drinking on 27th November 2021 - dad passed away on 10th December 2021,
March 2022, my best friend passed away, Not long after that his son (April 2022) and Wife (June 2022) took their own lives.
June 20th 2022, mum ended up in hospital and on a respiratory care ward. July 10th 2022 i end up in hospital after my airway collapsed stopping me from breathing. 3 weeks and 2 surgeries later i was released home the day after mum (3rd August).
10th August 2022 mum passed away.
9th October 2022 another friend took his life.
Then nothing until 1st October 2023, my nephew was murdered whilst out having a few drinks with friends. Stabbed because he stood up for a girl who was being harassed by some lads in a bar telling them to leave her alone and paid the ultimate price for being a nice lad.
Then to here, how did I get here sober, I canāt say it was easy but all the things that happened made me realise I was needed in my sober form, there to support people, there to help pick up the pieces and not be just someone else and to be a burden.
Through it all I have had many people here offer me comfort and words when I needed them and Iām thankful for that, a milestone does not just belong to the individual but to all those who help the milestones be achieved.
Lastly, I have to say an amazingly huge thank you to my one amazing constant in here @Twizzlers who despite all the things she has going on makes sure she checks in almost every day with me.
I send you all thanks for your support and pass on love and strength to you all!
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Checking in on day 393 AF.
Been to work, been to the gym, and had dinner. Now relaxing in front of some classic Jack Lemmon & Walter Matthau - Grumpy Old Men.
Always makes me laugh 
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Checking in
Day 652
Struggled today with my energy. Had a hard time getting going but forced myself to get up and go outside with my son. Went to the dollarstore for some christmas decorations to make our apartment a bit more festive. Now just waiting until its time to take the cab to the hospital for my sons MRI results. Im anxious to know them. Hope its good news. And hope everyone has a good day!
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Thank you Dana!
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Checking in again day 2. Group therapy was great today - all people in recovery. Really enjoyed opening up to strangers about it and hearing their stories of struggles. My mother continues to deny my experience. I told her about the recent vomiting binging and she said it must have been something I ate (ignoring that I couldnāt stand up). It really upsets me the way she challenges me - because its likely she is wanting me to prove how bad I am. Iāve already broken my collarbone, sent myself to A&E (called her during it), and got fired from a job and assaulted. What else does she want?
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Hey, is you mum a drinker also, or dependant on you being her source of friendship, social circle /fun/entertainment?
Just curious.
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Wow!!! Congratulations on your 2 years!!! You have really been through alot and remained sober the whole time. That says alot about the strength u have in ur recovery! Glad ur with us Richard!!
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Hi @Tragicfarinelli - good question. My mom is actual an anorexic and tee total but she āpretendsā to drink, like will have a small glass of wine but never drink it, its bizarre. She is competitive with everyone around her and I think her desire for others to drink means we wonāt notice she is not eating her food and means she can alwasy feel good that she has consumed the least calories on the table. So its messy. She also thinks that if we have issues then she is a āBad motherā, so me admitting I have a problem to her and othersā¦ she is thinking about her own image (I think?) Why else would she want me to deny my issues?
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Checking in sober.
Accepted the new job and turned in my resignation at my current one. Itās bittersweet because I love my current boss. But the new opportunity is amazing.
And put my foot down and set hard boundaries with the guy Iām seeing. Not sure we have a future and Iām coming to terms with that.
I make stupid decisions when it comes to guys and dating. But I now recognize that and understand why. And working through that in therapy (among a million other things).
Taking everything OFDAAT.
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Day 317.
Checking in, sober. The first few days of my UK trip were hectic, but lovely.
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Ah I see, so in her own way she is also in active addiction of some kind. I only asked as my mom used to be similar and for slightly similar reasons; āself imageā absolutely. She would do the most fucked up stuff then gush love bombs publicly, which made no sense.
Does it feel like a case of misery loves company also, in that you can both have some parts that arenāt right going on ? And therefore you can both actively ignore those bits together as a unit thatās āgood familyā? I would just be careful to set your boundaries and make sure that you are not being used as a pawn.
Despite the idealistic thought that parents want the best for their kids, Iāve found it opposite in my situation. I was only encouraged to scrabble around in the same room I was born into, never leave, donāt do different, donāt change or grow or have free thinking. Letās all pretend we are functioning well together. Considering Iāve had a black eye and septic burnt legs from some of our lovely family nights together, you can see perfection or normalcy is not even perception in this case. But why donāt we all laugh about it???
Draw your line and stick with yourself. Only you know what you need. Everyone else has to accept that. 
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608 day check in 
Back to work this week after a break. It was a tiring day yesterday and still adjusting to my decrease in meds.
All is pretty well at home, grateful for the warm weather, working from home, my family. And you guys.
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@Noshame congrats on 200 days AF 
@Freckles2 welcome back 
sorry to read youāve been struggling 
sending strength š©µ
@JazzyS thank you I hope your doctors appointment went well š©µ
@HolySquid sorry about your car 
but congrats on 265 days AF and 12 years smoke-free amazing 
@nastya_is_fighting good to read from you
@Frank68 congrats on 40 days
@Lainenicole96 congrats on your weekš
@TrustyBird happy anniversary 
@Tragicfarinelli congrats on your week
@Rockstar24777 so good to see you sorry to read youāve been struggling glad the meds are helping š©µ congrats on your continued sobriety
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@Mischa84 congrats on 150 days
@BrOKenWolf that truly is a lot of loss 
Iām so sorry š©µ extra congrats on 2 years 
@Butterflymoonwoman sending you strength I hope the appointment goes well š©µ
1204 days no alcohol.
669 days no cocaine.
184 days no vape.
Finally got a bit more sleep last night. Had such a vivid and bizarre dream and woke up wide awake at 3:30AM. Did get back to sleep around 5:30 for another hour or so.
Did my morning routine, read a chapter of my book, and did my walk to near the gym and back.
Quite worried about the state of my mental health, glad Iām seeing a psychiatrist on Thursday, and I just hope Iām able to verbalize and articulate my struggles.
š©µ
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