It’s done! A very friendly, calm and skilled medical assistant took my blood. No pain at all! Simply awesome! I’m so relieved, you have no idea! Now I’m waiting to talk to the Dr about our next steps 
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Oh that is lovely news … grateful it all went smoothly and calmly for you. Much love Sabrina… hope you have a wonderful Friday 
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Hey yall first time checking in twice in a day in some time. I just wanted to throw this out to anyone dealing with anxiety… i have been for a while and in the past i would drink in every and all social situation to deal. After giving up booze (16 months was my longest) i soon turned to xanax in moderation to help with anxiety during work and social situations. Now 34 days without pills I have learned a few things to help me cope. The number one thing has been change of scenery. I had been in the service industry for 10+ years working at different bars and restaraunts in the tahoe area. Fast paced, high anxiety shit. I have since been doing home remodels with another sober friend. Anxiety has been way lower. Another thing that has greatly helped has been doing cold water therapy. The “Wim Hoff” method has been my go to, and I try to practice it daily through breathing exercises and then a cold plung into the river. This mental and physical benefits are fucking amazing, and I high recommend it to anyone(anxiety or not). Yo I hope you guys all have a good one. Its my birthday tomorrow and I plan to spend it sober!
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All fine, good sleep. Looking forward to a sober weekend.
Keep on going everyone… Time will pass no matter what, use it well. 
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Day 6 in the bank.
Family have gone away for the weekend while i stay home for work and to look after the dogs. Staying sober. Time for sleep and gym in the morning
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Great to hear! I’m planning to start cold plunging and I read a bit about Wim Hoff methode.
Any tips?
(I started thread about it)
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Day 24. Orientation was good yesterday, just sat and went over some packets and then did some small tutorials on the computer and a quick exam. It did take me a couple times to pass the exam lol, but yeah then I came home and just kinda relaxed. Definitely was feeling very lazy this morning, didn’t really want to get out of bed which scares me so I need to get a better routine for that so I can be reliable. Im grateful I did wake up though and I’m about to hit the road. Grateful I have a bike to ride, grateful im here and sober and just going to try and make it the best day I possibly can. Much love everyone
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Good morning everyone 
Im still feeling low and im not surebwhat the word is, but abandoned? Jarred? Shocked? My qnxiety is back for the first time in quite some tine and this is very painful. In honesty i am not aure how to continue a relationshop with my dad. I am overwhelmed by the magnitude and darkness, and I have to somehow deal with this. I just feel so triggered, a word I dont use too often! Like deep deep deep, all my muscles are tight and sore and I feel beat up here.
Going to say a little prayer. I have to somehow find faith that I will perservere, that I have not done anything to deserve this and that I am better for this. I just cannot believe it, how long this slow poisoning has been going on my brain is blown. I need to get my brain back.
- This is not my fault.
- I am not stupid for not seeing this.
- I do not deserve it.
- I cannot control this. (This last one is where I struggle, becayse I love my dad very much)
Grateful to be sober, my Lord the anxiety and physical stress I feel. Pray pray pray, more shall be revealed and this too shall pass. Karma karma karma xo. 1
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Checking in this morning as I work through day 27. I’m just so content, not just happy but truly content. I’m just noticing so many things the more clear my mind gets, and life is beautiful. Addiction only made me see the bad things so then it could talk me into using. I worked so hard to feed my addiction and now I’m working even harder to fuel my recovery. I know that I could go back to old habits so easily but I’m not going to today. Tomorrow who knows, but I’ll worry about to tomorrow when it gets here. Have a fantabulous sober Friyay everyone!!!
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How about martial arts? Tae Kwon Do preferably haha I’m biased. You get a workout and it’s very structured.
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Going to look into some local options over the weekend - may be a good fit or something to at least try a class and see if it’s for me!
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Day 84 and all is well.
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Sending you strength. I’ve been estranged from my father about 18 years + now. My dad was abusive during our childhood and then he remarried after an awful breakup where we were tossed around and basically latch key kids with no food and no parents home. I’ll keep the story as short as I can as it’s an epic tragedy in length 
. My dad’s remarried life didn’t resemble my childhood at all, SM ruled the house and her own kids were first. After she was just picking on me so much I moved out at 16 and slept on sofas.
Me and my sister were just trash that turned up for tea every week. Then she made it hard and said she was fed up of cooking for us and different meals (her kids were fussy). It was so hard and heartbreaking but we walked away one week and just never returned. I was lucky to have my little sister because she needed me more than I needed to heal myself. I rationalised this for her and was strong for her as she loved dad and is a very emotional soul. Years turned into decades and he never tried to get in touch. She did, sending letters and trying to text to be apologetic.
I never chose to forgive and that’s my line. That’s to do with other trauma and psychological damage that I felt was unresolved and caused by them. I don’t need the trash in my life now I am older and brave and able to fend for me and my rights.
I’m so so sorry you are in the eye of the storm right now, just take care of yourself and realise that adults are responsible for their own business. Your dad has a responsibility towards you Mira. He should be ashamed.
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Hey all, checking in on day 1272. I hope everybody has a good one!
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Day 1,274 clean and sober today. My symptoms are not getting better so a doctor will be calling me between 9am and 12 today to hopefully prescribe me the Covid medication. I hope everyone has a great day today, love you guys 
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Checking in on day 187.
I’ve had more energy recently but have been struggling to fill my time with things that feel meaningful. I made it to five yoga classes this week which I’m pleased with. I’m meeting some friends for dinner on Saturday night which I’m looking forward to. They’ll all be drinking but I’m ok with that.
On Sunday I intend to get a Christmas tree and we can get it decorated. Maybe that will spur me on to feeling a bit more festive.
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Day
212 no alcohol
143 no vapes or ciggs
2 no Marijuana
Bright sunny day here in Massachusetts usa
Makes for a good day to wake up sober
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Happy Friday, all! Check8ngnin on day 149.
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Feeling so much better today! Slept really well, even if it wasn’t for very long. Working through the leftovers of this sickness but I’m grateful. I’m filled with a lot of gratitude for this community today. We really have a vital resource here together and I take it for granted at times. I get complacent or sometimes even ambivalent or even still disgruntled. It’s all normal, how I feel about things that happen in any community fluctuates. But when I see folks come together to bolster a person in need it warms my heart. We rock!
When we were buying our house this summer I was chatting with our realtor about my past career and thoughts about reentering the workforce after a long period of not working. She mentioned they would be looking for someone to help in their office part time in 6 months or so and asked if I was interested, which I said yes, because these two women realtors are strong, connected, grounded and pleasant people! I’d love to work for them. Anyway, time passed and I’d think about it every now and then. Lately I’ve been considering going back to work and looking at job listings when lo and behold I get a text from her asking if I’m still interested! Yes! We are meeting for coffee/tea next Friday and I’m super excited. I’d love to start the new year in a new chapter going back to work. I think it will contribute to feelings of confidence and reduce my isolation significantly. Wish me luck!
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77.7
I feel weak now. Somehow, somewhy I was feeling bad with these relationship after my divorce with my wife. This new woman wanted to live with me after few years of friendship, yet I did not wanted that. I don’t know if that was too early for me, or I just don’t want to start new relationships after my divorce. I tried, but most of the time I was feeling that something was ain’t ritght. I don’t want to go into too much details as I can talk forever here.
I feel good now, I can concentrate more on my spiritual path. For me relationships is not most important part in the life. It can be… but not necessarily. There are different paths in life. Some people become monks or priests. Something is calling me. Asceticism. Being alone. I feel good in those places as I am getting closer towards something bigger than myself. What is happiness? What is happiness?? Is it things or family? Happiness is a state of mind. It is important to share that. Happiness is only real when shared. Yet it must be pure. It must be true. It must be discovered within. We can feel it when we share it with our family. With our relatives. This is like a circle. It does not necessarily ends around ourselves or our family, or our relatives, or our lands… It can grow and it has no limits. Love has no limits. True love. Pure love. I am not talking about something that ends with flesh. Flesh and this world is just a sand falling between our fingers. It is limited. True kingdom starts where our ego ends. This is what is worth seeking. This is my virtues. I am standing strong towards it.
We need to find that happiness that state of mind and then share it, not take it, but give it. We need to make our hearts bigger to make more space for something bigger than ourselves that does not ends with only satisfying our scences, feeding our flesh.
I feel weak in this moment. I feel a little bit lonely and want that feeling of warmth, something more Platonic. I will overcome it. That only shows that I am still lacking of light. In moments of suffering, loneliness, darkness is where masks falls off. It is necessary to suffer as it is a big part of the life as it is necessary part of Growing.
This quote from Nietzsche always gives me a smile on my face and reminds me not to fall into temptations.
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