Back to work this morning. I’m OK. I spent the weekend well and even saw some sunshine. So on we go. Sober and clean. Have as good a Monday as you can all. Love.
2545 days. At my women’s meeting today I went up to talk to a woman that I don’t normally talk to. I had been thinking about her b/c she had shared about her cancer in the past. I don’t normally go up to talk to people I don’t know or don’t think I would be comfortable talking to. It was such an akward conversation and I have been feeling really uncomfortable ever since!! Her cancer is better and she is in remission so that is good. But during the conversation she asked me if I was okay so I don’t know what the look was on my face. I just want to feel comfortable in my skin again. I don’t know why something that small can mess me up so much. Ugh!! It makes me not want to try again with talking to someone new.
Today felt so long. Woke up with a headache and it was pretty tough to get moving. I haven’t eaten much the past couple days, which is probably related. Work was actually pretty good, for a Sunday.
When I got my daughter after, my mom said all she did was sleep the whole time. That’s how I know when she’s sick, bc she will not normally sleep for any other reason than bedtime. She had a pretty high fever and I was relieved that I already had medicine at home for her. Whatever I had must have been mad contagious. I tested for covid, just out of curiosity. It was negative. Not that the result would effect anything. She can’t go to school within 24 hours of a fever either way, but I hope she feels better.
Should make for a pretty calm day off. My only one this week. We picked up a funeral Tuesday. We’re not even open Tuesdays this time of year, but it’s money, so we are now, and I volunteered. I need to be out of the house as much as possible and able to get ahead of things before we close for a month, in a month. That’s my least favorite time of year. Idle hands. I have to believe it could be the hardest time yet, so I stay ever vigilant in my thoughts.
Nothing too eventful today. Kids were here for breakfast. Went with the old classic hashbrowns, eggs and ham. Always good being with my kids. Did a little workout, finished some laundry, went to my friends house to fix her Traeger, pizza and football for dinner and I’m home in bed.
Up early tomorrow to hit the gym and then start my three day work week. Looking forward to five days away before the Christmas rush.
Had a little sobriety moment of thankfulness as I was driving to help my friend today. Just felt happy to be sober to be able to help. That sounds pathetic, but for me it’s huge. Any other Sunday over the last two years of my relapse I was drinking first thing every morning on the weekends. I wouldn’t have been able to drive and would have been completely unable to take a Traeger apart and put it back together. Feels good to be useful instead of useless. Happy to be sober.
Day 163. Day off today. Very dark outside this morning. May go for a dog walk by the sea and then relax. Tinnitus is really problematic at the moment but it settles during the day. Had some messages from my kids but sadly no attempts to meet up.
May do some reading later. That may help. Have a fab sober day
Nice headshot. I see some healthy sparkle in those eyes. I would imagine some good answers will come on the websites. I googled it and wasn’t sure if what I came up with was legit or not.
Nice to see your check ins.
@Alisa thank u, yes me too about online. I know they exist and I’m going to find them. I have a friend looking for them. She has a lot of connections around my town. Hopefully that works out.
1984 rocks! 
