@Jules000
I’m sorry that you’re having to go through this and see your father like this.
I hope that you will be able to show your father the letter. Or read it to him.
Addiction steals so much from individuals, their loved ones and friends.
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Day 175. I was antisocial as f@ yesterday. Today I have a chance to do it better. I know it’s because I feel clueless on chit chat with large groups… But I can do it easily in work mode. So today I will be more social.
Weather is pants.
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Day 34 checking in
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14 days in the bank.
2 weeks sober. Today was another good day at work. Rode my bike which is always a great start to the day.
Came home and did an early xmas with some family. Didn’t drink despite everyone else drinking. Just got back from walking with the kids to check out xmas lights.
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Day 13
These days I’m thinking about loneliness and going through sobriety alone. I am open about it to friends, but I don’t get invited much when I don’t drink. I have to say, sober me doesn’t initiate much too. I tried, but the bigger part of my social life happend around drinking and most of my friends don’t care too much for sober lunches, walks or tea.
I am an introvert and find it hard to engage with new people without a drink in hand.
I love the TS community, it’s such a big help, but sometimes I just miss these kind of conversations in real life.
Anyways, thanks for listening, as always 
Have a good one everybody! 
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Hey all, checking in on day 1280. I hope everybody has a good one!
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I’m not sure where you are, but I saw you writing Dutch here at some point right? You’re in the Netherlands like me? There’s some alternatives to 12 steps groups (AA/NA etcetera) here, not that many but some. Dharma (Buddhist) Recovery is one, they have meetings in four places in The Netherlands now I think. The Buitenveldert group is another one, totally secular. Haven’t looked much further that those myself. I found my support group here, online, also because I have a hard time socializing but through therapy I’m getting better at that.
But you are right, and I find forging a new social (sober) life hard also. The hardest thing in Recovery maybe. I did make some real new friends online, problem with those they are far away, in other countries and continents, so meeting them in person doesn’t happen often.
The friends I was around most before becoming sober were heavy drinkers as well. They didn’t have an off switch either and to me it seems they are either jealous of my sobriety, or feel guilt and shame about their own drinking. Whatever it is, they are just no fun to hang around with as a sober person.
One step I’m taking in the right direction I feel is reconnecting with older friends, friends that don’t have a problem with drugs or alcohol, friends that got lost when I spiralled down ever deeper into addiction. Making new friends face to face is still hard for me. So maybe, If you are not too far away, we could meet at some point. Who knows. I’ve had some good experiences with meeting TS peeps before. Take care anyway friend. 
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80’ Dance Party sounds like nice shot of endorphins, hope it will make you feel some better
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Congrats on reaching out and asking for help. That is always so tough!
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Day 32. Yesterday at work was good. Got home from work and fell asleep right away, did a little laundry slept mostly till this morning. I’m up and ready for work and I still feel very heavy and tired kind of but I’m up and said my gratitudes. I want to try and not sleep after work but idk part of me doesn’t know what else to do, I don’t really have anywhere to go or anyone to hang out with so laying down and relaxing after work is what I do. I would like to stay occupied, but idk I guess for now Ill take the relaxing moments. Not sure what else to say today. Much love
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Hi Naomi, I tried to send you a private message, but it won’t let me. Looking for sober female friends who want to chat with me in Dutch and maybe meet later in real life, are you interested? 
I think we have a lot in common.
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Checking in on day 140 AF
Congratulations to all of you on your sober journey.
It’s a rocky road at times but with the support of this forum and it’s wonderful people on here we’re strong together.
Have a good sober and clean weekend everyone 
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Checking in day 195 AF.
I’ve had a lazy morning in bed today and I’m contemplating how different it feels to not be racked with anxiety and depression. Outwardly it probably looks the same but I’m feeling calm and have been doing my NYT puzzles and slowly waking up to the day. The plan for the weekend is to tidy the flat and to be ready for Christmas and the winter break.
We were given tickets to the pantomime earlier in the week and we all enjoyed that.
I also managed along to yoga every day and I had a couple of meetings with my support worker during the week.
Wishing everyone an addiction free day.
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This! I feel like myself again 
I was waiting for the fear to come, but nothing happened. The whole time I was able to have a good conversation with her, very nice.
On my way home a stranger approached just to tell me that I have a very kind appearance. This never happened to me! After that it got a little strange because he (I think?) tried to flirt with me? But he wasn’t my type of guy at all, awkward situation. But still, it was nice 
I hope you have a good day? Hugs!
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Feeling a bit better this morning, wide awake at 5:30 after sleeping a lot yesterday. Just the regular crud now, cough, snot, some aches and sore throat. We are both officially negative for COVID and that’s a relief. Now to continue resting up and recovering.
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Congratulations on 10 months!
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Luck 13! Congratulations!!
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@TrustyBird Emilie, you are most certainly not a monster, the way you’re describing your relationship with your mom and the anxiety dealing with her reminds me of how I am when it comes to my dad. I never ever under any circumstances answer the phone to him. He hardly ever calls, but when he does, I just text my mom to find out what he wanted 
I think not going to the funeral and sending flower in lieu of your presense is a safe bet.
@Just_Laura Congrats on 10 months, Laura! We’re basically almost sober twins. 
@RosaCanDo Glad to hear you’re on the tail end of your sickness. Covid sucks. Hopefully you and your husband will be well enough to enjoy the holidays.
Day 336.
As the end of the year is approaching, I’m feeling more contemplative and all that jazz.
I’m depressed. Nothing new, but today I slept till 2 pm and I really seriously need to sort out my sleep pattern. Late nights and sleeping through the day means I’m not getting enough daylight, which makes my depression worse. It’s a vicious cycle.
Also, I’m on the pre-Christmas gig hunt as I lost two clients, one paid weekly and I was relying on Mondays pay to get through the holiday. Like, for presents and shit. Goal for 2024 is to finally stop living paycheck to paycheck and relying on luck and miracles to get me by. Im 33 for fucks sake, at the very least I should have a little emergency fund or something adulty like that.
The client who dropped me wrote, ‘I’m sorry to drop this on you during the Holidays.’ Like… yeah, mate, I’m sure you were very broken up about it. sigh
So… yeah, the year’s been a bit of a mixed bag, especially the last few months. Like… beaurocratic hell, death, the fucking cold/flu from hell sent by the devil himself hitting me after spending a fortune to go to the UK, and now… losing income right before Christmas. However, good things happened too. I travelled a lot, spent 6 weeks on a beautiful Croatian island (going back next summer!), and I did it all sober. And sobriety means I went through a full year without any A&E visits because I was doing something insane while blacked out. Now, that is fucking priceless.
That’s… not bad.
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Day 1,282 clean and sober. Spent my weekend cleaning up my apartment from being sick the last week and it’s back to looking nice. Relapsed on vaping but tomorrow is a new day. I hope everyone has an amazing day today, love you guys 
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Day 14 and I am really struggling with my sugar intake. Gonna try to load up on fruit and see if I can replace the candy with a healthier alternative because my body is achy. But, enough complaining 
my journey has felt pretty good… my friends are supportive of my decision now and I know that I can keep going. I don’t feel the urge to drink with friends and they even like the idea of finding new activities that do not include alcohol and it encourages me to keep going because this is the best decision anyone could make. Have a blessed day everyone!
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