26 days in the bank
Still sick. Slightly better though. Hopefully turned the corner and on the improve.
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36 no binge, no sugar
2 HPFs
1 dairy
Had a crazy dream about wolfing down a whole plate of danishās 
and having to reset my counter.
After yesterdayās end of year review I want to focus on the coming year today.
Need to do groceries too. Iām always very annoyed with the slow people in the market. But today I want to take my inspiration from @Rob11 and practice patience. And obviously there will be plenty of food triggers in the supermarket. Letās see how Iāll navigate these.
I wish you all patience with all the āslowā stuff in your lives today.
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Day 187. Working 7.45_3pm then 8_5 tomoro
Feeling quite healthy! Had a rubbish headache last night but thatās passed.
Today lots of admin to do for work then relaxing. Hoping for a quiet January. Booked the last week of jan and the last week of Feb off to have some planned quiet time and go walking in Cornwall
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1664
Not feeling the best today. Fourth time in a couple of moths Iām down with either some allergies or a cold. Exactly the same symptoms each time. No fever. Reminds me of a hangover a bit, with added clogged nose and sinuses. Very happy I donāt have a hangover to deal with as well. Never again.
Iāll get through this day, even when it might be not my most brilliant one. Good days and bad ones. One day at a time. Have as good a day as you can all. Sober and clean as there is nothing drinking or drugging would make much much worse.
I need another warm sunny memory this morning. Sunset in Terlingua TX 2017. Might have been dawn 
. Love.
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*Day 1927 
Quick checkin: feeling sick 
Catched a cold ore the flu, whatever.
Worked while sick yesterday. Today off from work and hope I can work my 4.5 houres tomorrow.
First focus on today and thatās: chill, sleep and doing nothing 
And maybe glance at the buddha flowerpot I got from Santa.
Zen!
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103
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Third day but if I take off the one glass of sherry Iāve only had drink once in about 3 weeks. Even though I have had a couple of blips and because Iām not drinking everyday anymore Iām feeling so much better, cravings are going away, got myself a zero beer last night.
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Great day to be sober,I have 72 days and I am still here,I am grateful today to make today better than yesterday.
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Day 348.
Today is tree day. By that, I mean Iām going on a hike to see some fucking trees and clear my head in nature.
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Day 193. Early AM. Just getting off of work. Less anxiety than normal today. Feels good. One day at a time.
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Checking in day 480! Was sick for a full week (though had some moments of feeling better so got to celebrate the holiday a bit) but finally better. Off work til Tuesday- going on a quick trip to visit my boyfriends family and my best friend through Monday. Iām looking forward to it. My ex let me know heās been dealing with medical complications related to drinking and was in the hospital- sad to hear, and also makes me grateful for sobriety.
Hope everyone is doing well. Wishing everyone a terrific sober Thursday 
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Day 44. Good morning everyone, up and at work. Work yesterday was good, got home and did throw my laundry in and vacuumed and cleaned up a little. But I did still fall asleep after that lol, I woke up around 6 and went to Walmart for a few small things I needed. And just looked around which was nice I guess, my clothes took forever to dry for some reason so I didnāt get to bed until around 12 am lol. But Iām excited my girls are coming today, we will be staying at a hotel and probably do some swimming. Excited for my day off with my girls. Grateful for my mom that she is able to help bring them down. Still feel a little lost with life, I applied for the environmental service tech in Tupper, they never called and now itās new manager so they donāt know anything about my history there, but literally they never called me back and I just noticed yesterday that they posted they were looking for a environmental service tech. So why they didnāt call me idk, but Iām assuming itās for my best interest. But I really would love to be back with my girls. Living here in Plattsburgh away from them is so hard. Idk much love everyone take care
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Day 1,294 clean and sober today. Itās Saturday for me yay!!! I have a huge headache and slept wrong last night so my neck is killing me but itās ok. Grateful for the time to relax and look forward to a peaceful day. Proud of you all, love you guys 
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Sorry youāre sick. That flower pot is gorgeous. How big is it?
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Day #25, next goal #255 and more
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@Timetochange belated congrats on 6+ months 
@zzz thank you for sharing about the Lithuanian tradition, I found it really interesting to read. Also, belated congrats on triple digits 
+
@Doreen1 belated congrats on 90+ days
@Trixie1 belated congrats on triple digits +
@EarnIt wow, sorry about your fall 
a month is a long time to be hospitalised, sending healing vibes
@Rob11 belated congrats on 1100 days
@Naomi belated congrats on 3+ weeks
@nas congrats on 2+ weeks
@ShyBert belated congrats on 50+ days
@Country welcome 
congrats on your days so far
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@Alden have you spoken to a medical professional about how youāre feeling, and the witches you are seeing and hearing? They may be able to help. Sending you strength and hope š©µš«
@Amy30 Iām sorry your Xmas was so hard, I can relate a lot to your post. Sending strength š©µ I hope the trees help 
@Tomek sorry about the fight with your ex It is a big step, but you will get through it and figure things out, one step at a time as you say. Sending strength and hope š©µ
@Dilettante belated congrats on 5+ months
@RosaCanDo sorry youāre so unwell, feel better soon š©µ seen your more recent post and Iām glad youāre feeling better. Congrats too! 
@happyfeet belated congrats on 150+ days
@Shatteredsoul welcome back sorry about the circumstances, but Iām glad you checked in, sending strength š©µ
@Frank68 belated congrats on 70+ days
@Nate2 congrats on 70 days
@Newlife89 welcome back congrats on 5 days
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@SadMemeQueen thatās awful Iām so sorry. Also sorry you were dismissed by your new doctor, I hope you can schedule another appointment to go through the rest of your symptoms soon. Sending strength as we approach NYE š©µ
@MrFantastik oh no! Feel better soon š©µ
@Daleb welcome congrats on 9 days
@JazzyS just seen your mention, thank you for thinking of me 
, Xmas day was nice, Boxing day not so much, relieved to be decompressing, despite a full night of insomnia 
š©µ
@GOKU2019 belated congrats on 800+ days
@Mno & @SoberWalker I hope you both feel better soon š©µ
@Zse welcome congrats on 25 days
1234 days no alcohol.
699 days no cocaine.
214 days no vape.
Checking-in with yesterdayās numbersā¦
Havenāt checked in for the past 4 days, so where to start!?..
I did actually manage to finish the wrapping eventually, and write everyoneās cards. I didnāt put my tree up though.
The day my brother and I visited my mumās grave for her birthday, he invited me to theirās on Xmas morning, to watch my niece open some of her presents. While I was there, he realised I was going home alone for the rest of the day, then invited me to stay for the food. I went home to give my cats their presents and some catnip, then went back to my brotherās. My SILās parents did the cooking, because my SIL is full-term pregnant, the food was sooo good! I had never spent time with my SILās parents before, but I had a lovely time.
Due to not being able to drive in the dark, I had to leave at 3pm so I could drive home safely. Then I relaxed with my cats and wrapped the extra gifts for Boxing Day.
Then, Boxing Day arrived, my brother was an hour late picking me up but didnāt communicate this to me, and waiting makes me extremely anxious so I canāt relax, even though it was no big deal. Iād bought some more flowers in water for my Mumās grave first thing, so we went there first. Afterwards, we went to my dadāsā¦
We got to my dads, we all exchanged gifts. We ate an Xmas buffet. When I went to the kitchen to get some water, my step-mum presented me with 3 big bottles of alcohol-free drinks. Out of obligation, I tried some, then preceeded to drink 2 big bottles in an alcoholic fashion, I did check the ingredients beforehand, and there was genuinely no alcohol in them (there usually is 0.05%) and if I was drinking water Iād likely have drank the equivalent or more, because I do drink 7-9 litres of squash a day anyway, but it still didnāt feel right.
I felt so left out and cast aside. At one point everyone was sitting in a square together in the lounge, and there was nowhere for me to sit so I had to sit behind them all, behind some tall cabinets so I couldnt even see anyone. I wasnāt included in the conversation. At other points everyone was in different rooms having their own convos and I was on my own. I felt like there was no point in me being there. There was also the usual judgemental xmas conversation about who they suspect is on or dealing drugs in their town, calling them low-lifes and wastes of space, I was behind them, wishing I could vanish into the chair, or even better, teleport home to my cats. (They donāt know Iāve ever used drugs, and they laugh about my alcoholism, just like they did when it was first obvious when I was 12 years old).
Anyway, enough talk about the family in which I am the black sheep. Yesterday was a new day, at home with my cats, decompressing. I was feeling low, but not scared of myself low, just trying to ride it out.
I hope those of you who celebrated, enjoyed your festivities.
I have been awake since 8am yesterday after a full night of insomnia last night. I need to stay awake now and shower, because I have a hands-on physio appointment for my back in 2.5 hours.
I ran out of 
s around 60 posts ago, sorry about that.
On we goā¦
š©µ
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Welcome to Talking Sober, Zse! Congratulations on your sober days. I hope we will see you around and joining in.
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